[newbie] Modem Setup, Help!

[Sevatio Octavio]

I have a USRobotics pnp ISA int modem.  My objective is to be able to dial into an ISP.

Now, I've gone over a pile of word-gravel (a.k.a. HOWTOs) and I don't want to know 
what a modem is or what a com port is or the
history of so and so...

Where can I go to get the straight answer on how to get my modem to dial up my ISP?  
How do you get it to recognize the modem?  How
do you assign the com port to the modem?

Thanks,
Seve