Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[Balmatmic]

Don't get me wrong, my husband Pete is  supportive and very helpful.  Heck, 
I've kind of got it made these  days.  He just retired, and makes my coffee and 
breakfast, and at night,  brings me my capucchino at night.  Not too shabby.
 
However, I feel that all of us can  benefit from some therapy dealing with 
something like this.  That's not  something he feels is necessary.  He rarely 
vents, but it's very apparent,  especially now that he's retired, that our 
lives 
are not what we expected and  planned what they would have been like when 
retirement came around.  
 
I hibernate in the winter, and I live in  California where it doesn't usually 
get below 50 degrees during the  day.  The cold feels like it goes to my 
bones, which I know isn't the way  it is, it's the nerves that are reacting to 
it. 
 They get that way even  though it's not cold in the house.  I think it's the 
barometric pressure  that actually affects them.  He hates that I hardly will 
go out of the  house, so he gets cranky sometimes.  That is all he usually 
does.  He  probably mutters other things that I don't hear too.  I hope he 
does, 
he  has to get it out sometime.  I just wish that he'd talk to somebody about 
 his feelings.  It's just not something he was exposed to growing up, so  
he's not comfortable doing it with other people.
 
Hugs, Barbara A  
 
 
 
 
 
 



**Need a new ride? Check out the largest site for U.S. used car 
listings at AOL Autos.  
(http://autos.aol.com/used?NCID=aolcmp0030002851)

[TMIC] Shower Wheelchair

[Akua]

Does anyone use a shower wheelchair?

I'm having trouble transferring off my shower chair
in my new shower.
How would I have to amend  Quickie wheelchair  to use it in the shower?
Could I?
A special pad?
Or is i bought another seat, could I leave my usual seat to dry
and have a dry set to use?

Invacare has the Mariner rehab shower chair: $625.00
http://www.improvelife.com/Sale/Bathroom-Wheelchairs/Mariner-Rehab-Shower-Commode-Chair
and Drive has for $715
REHAB/SHOWER COMMODE WHEELCHAIR
http://www.improvelife.com/Sale/Bathroom-Wheelchairs/Rehab-Shower-Commode-Wheelchair

since I'm spending $132 a month for showering, these don't seem too bad
http://ucanhealth.com/goto.php?page=detail.php&graph1=38008
$533

Akua
--

[TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[bobby jim hijar]

Well, in our case, me missus went from TM to an MS dx in less than two years 
and that was over 10 years ago.

As her caregiver, I can't feel her pain but as Sandy says, I can understand 
what she goes thru, and also sympathize and most of all, make sure that all, or 
most, of her needs are met.  
Indeed, a full time job.

I guess that some of us are more willing to be tolerant of the needs of others 
who are in need; other than those others who don't wish to understand at all or 
couldn't care less.  oh well

I know of instances where the spouse took a hike rather than deal with the 
illness of the affected one.
What creeps.

Regards from Elvisland, Bobby Jim
  From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] ; tmic-list@eskimo.com 
  Sent: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 4:06 PM
  Subject: Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM


  I don't have TM, my husband does, (8 years now).  Therefore, I will try to 
speak from the standpoint of understanding.   However, I don't FEEL his pain, 
but I SYMPATHIZE with his pain.  I sympathize with; his daily issues, his 
paralysis, his complaints, his clonus, his feeling of inadequacies, his 
feelings of frustration and pain over sexual dysfunction and bladder 
dysfunction, his loss of his past life and of OUR past lives.  I LISTEN to him. 
 I AM THERE FOR HIM.  I encourage him, I apologize for his pain and anything 
that will make him understand that I UNDERSTAND to a degree. But, I don't think 
anyone can FULLY understand unless they have TM.  He knows I understand more 
about TM than many.  But, as they say, "unless you can walk the walk".. I, 
more than likely, will never walk that walk.

  I love him, I am committed to him and I will continue to do my best to 
understand TM thru his eyes.  He is very detail oriented about it - so that in 
itself, helps me understand better.

  Anyone with a disease such as TM, needs someone to listen to them with 
compassion in their heart.  I will always do my best to be that person.

  Sandy Parker


From: Robert Pall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Sent: Tue, 15 Apr 2008 12:36 pm
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Thanks to the list.   
  Has anyone ever figured out how to make non TM'rs understand what we go thru 
24/7.
  If so please share the secret!

  Rob   
--
  From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
  Sent: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 3:30 PM
  To: Robert Pall
  Subject: Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list.


  Rob,
 That's the best thing about this list.Everyone knows how it feels to have 
tm;it's not something that a "regular" person understands.
  Cheryl in Easthampton,Mass.

  Robert Pall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
I would just like to thank all of the people on the list who responded to 
me in the past few weeks. It helped me thru a difficult time! 
I have been married for 38+ years and my wife has no idea what I go through 
on a daily basis….nor do my children, my relatives and my friends. Only the 
people on the list truly understand what it is like to get sick and never get 
better! Only the people on the list relate to terms such as banding, pins & 
needles, freezing/burning etc. Only the people who have TM can truly relate to 
TM and how (in my case) in just a few hours my life changed for the worse. 
I am sorry I and all of you have TM…but I am extremely grateful for 
the people on the list who always find the time to help!  THANK YOU ALL!
Rob in New Jersey  

Re: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Westgold]

Hello -- Sorry, Patti -- you do not understand how my program works at all. 
What you said is wrong. It is not MLM or a pyramid in any way. You do not 
call people and ask them to send you money. Last year I was looking for 
people to help me return phone calls from people who answered my ads, 
because there were so many I couldn't keep up with them.  Maybe that is what 
you saw.  I needed some people to help me call the lists of people who 
answered my ads, and invite them to listen to the information call.  That's 
all we have to do --  invite people to come to a live call where they hear 
how this program works. We do not ask people for money.  There is no selling 
or explaining, they explain everything on the call so we don't have to.  If 
anyone would like to check it out, please lte me know & I'll be happy to 
book you for a call, they're held everyday.


It is a private club where we all help each other learn how to leverage our 
money and make it grow by inviting others to join our club.  It has been 
going for over 6 years and has over 55,000 members in 16 countries.  It is 
very solid. I just found it last summer, and am averaging $10,000 a month. 
All we have to do is invite people to listen to the live call which explains 
exactly how it works, and it is their choice to join or not.  If someone you 
invited to the call joins, you get their sign-up money.  It is very 
straightforward.  There is no way to fail unless you don't invite anybody. 
Everybody is an equal member, there are no multi-levels where some people 
make more money than others.  Everybody is equal and has an equal chance to 
succeed. The more people you invite to the information call, the more will 
join, and the more money you will receive.  Very straightforward.  This is 
totally different from other things you may have seen.   Not everything on 
the web is a scam, I personally know a lot of people making $100K or more on 
the web every year.  It's a perfectly legitimate way to make a living, and 
perhaps the only way to make a good living for those who are disabled or in 
pain.


I've been trying to make a good living on the web for almost 10 years, since 
I can't go out to work anymore.  I tried a lot of different things, and this 
is by far the easiest and best.  It was a great blessing to me when my 
friend told me about this last summer, and we all pass on this blessing by 
helping as many people as we can by throwing out financial lifelines to 
those who need more money in their lives.


If you don't like this concept of people helping people to leverage their 
money, I'll be glad to get you set up in one of the businesses I was doing 
last year before I found this one.  They're more "real", with real products 
that you have to sell, etc.  It will take more work to make a decent amount 
of money, but I'll be happy to teach you how to do one or two of them.  I 
made $108,000 in 2006-7 with a couple of those businesses.  I have learned a 
lot in my 10 years on the web.  You can do well also, if you have someone 
who will teach you how to do it the right way.


I am offering to help anybody who would like to make some extra money.  I 
know how hard it is to make money when you're disabled in any way. And 
recently there have been more than the usual number of posts from people 
saying they can't afford special medical treatments, PT, pool time, extra 
nursing care, etc.  I just want to offer my help. I didn't expect to get 
shot down. My heart is pure -- I would never tell you dear souls about any 
business that is a scam.  I have a few perfectly legitimate businesses to 
show you, if anyone are interested.  If you're not, that's fine too. but 
please don't prejudge before you even know the real story.


take care -- Michelle

[TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[Jan Hargrove]

Sandy,
   
  Once again you'vd done a great job of telling what it's like and yet,
  you did it with humor
   
  Lucky Terry!!!
   
  It might be good for those whose caretakers don't have your attitude,
  to show this to their caretakers...you've made great comments
  and still, I knew how difficult it'd been for you...
   
  Lucky Terry!!
   
  Hugs. janh
   
   
   
   
  
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
  My Dear Friends,
   
  Thanks to all of you for your kind words.  Thank you to the fellow caregivers 
who are committed to helping their spouses/sig others to have a better quality 
of life, for being in their lives and staying put!   Aren't relationships 
suppose to be 50/50???   I am sorry for those that aren't.   Terry gives so 
much to me; why would I not give so much in return?
   
  Some of you old timers (on this site), know there have been struggles with 
this life and Terry's TM.  But, obviously nothing insurmountable.
   
  I will say that I was SO PISSED OFF (can I say that here?) at his wheelchair 
initially.  I took my anger out on his wheelchair every time I had to get it in 
or out of the trunk of my car.  I would cuss that SOB, (can I say that here?) 
out!  I hated it!  That's what I hated! I didn't hate the damn (can I say that 
here?) TM.  I hated that damn (can I say that here?) wheelchair!  That rigid 
piece of crap, (can I say that here)?   I can actually feel my anger right now 
as I write this.  However, I feel it with a smile on my face as that was so 
very long ago.  TM has allowed me to grow and become a better person.  It's OK 
now and he has a great wheelchair that's very easy to get in/out of the car. 
One flip of the backrest and I grab it and swing it into the back of the little 
(non gas guzzler), SUV.   (OK, so I rambled)...
   
  Aloha for now, my friends!
   
  Sandy




-
  Need a new ride? Check out the largest site for U.S. used car listings at AOL 
Autos.

RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Akua]

Agreed!
Sadly for me, it wasn't on at the time.
But my cell phone, always in my chair and at hand
saved the day.

If one lives alone and fears what will happen if they fall and can't 
get up, they should have a medic alert button or something similar 
which at a press of a button contacts medic alert who then 
dispatches medical help. I believe this is a fairly minimal 
expense...which could save our lives!


Rob in New Jersey


--

Re: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[pjv1234]

Michelle
I am a curious person so I checked into YOUR way "to make a very good living on 
the internet".  You condemned Frank, because he called it a pyramid. Yet,  many 
of us think Frank is a very smart man.  So I looked into your site myself.  I 
wonder if I was wrong in what I read.  The information that you sent to me said 
that you send lists and lists of people a request to send you money. Period. No 
strings attached. No promises. No gimmicks.  It appeared to me that if I ask 
enough people to mail me money some of them will actually do it!
Wow!  What a scheme!
My father-in-law once owned a circus.  He wasn't P. T. Barnum, however, he 
often quoated him when he told us, "There's a sucker born every minute."
Michelle, you can ask all the people you want to mail you a buck, but count me 
out!
By-the-way, I also have a friend with TM.  Actually, I have lots of friends 
with TM!

Patti - Michigan 
 Westgold <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: 
> MisunderstoodHello everybody.  I have been reading all your stories, and want 
> you to know that I pray for all of you everyday.  I do not have TM, I joined 
> this list because my dear friend has it.  I am disabled with arthritis and 
> sarcoidosis.  Because I can't go out anymore, I have learned to make a very 
> good living working on the internet, sitting down.  I will make over $100K 
> this year from my chair.  If there are any of you who would like to get a 
> little business going on the web, to either supplement your benefits or so 
> you'll be able to quit your job, please let me know.  I'll be very happy to 
> help you in any way I can, I do understand your situations.  I know that some 
> of you cannot afford PT or other therapies that would help you. It's easy to 
> bring in a couple thousand a month, or you can do more and bring in more. I 
> will work with you to help you meet your income needs.  Please contact me 
> privately if you are interested in learning more. Send me your number & I'll 
> give you a call.  [EMAIL PROTECTED]   
> 
> take care -- Michelle

Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[Parkerswebe]

My Dear Friends,
 
Thanks to all of you for your kind words.  Thank you to the  fellow 
caregivers who are committed to helping their spouses/sig others to have  a 
better 
quality of life, for being in their lives and staying put!Aren't 
relationships 
suppose to be 50/50???   I am sorry for  those that aren't.   Terry gives so 
much to me; why would I not give  so much in return?
 
Some of you old timers (on this site), know there have been struggles with  
this life and Terry's TM.  But, obviously nothing insurmountable.
 
I will say that I was SO PISSED OFF (can I say that here?) at his  wheelchair 
initially.  I took my anger out on his wheelchair every  time I had to get it 
in or out of the trunk of my car.  I would cuss that  SOB, (can I say that 
here?) out!  I hated it!  That's what I  hated! I didn't hate the damn (can I 
say that here?) TM.  I hated that damn  (can I say that here?) wheelchair!  
That 
rigid piece of crap, (can I say  that here)?   I can actually feel my anger 
right now as I write  this.  However, I feel it with a smile on my face as that 
was so very long  ago.  TM has allowed me to grow and become a  better 
person.  It's OK now and he has a great wheelchair that's very easy  to get 
in/out 
of the car. One flip of the backrest and I grab it and swing  it into the back 
of the little (non gas guzzler), SUV.   (OK, so I  rambled)...
 
Aloha for now, my friends!
 
Sandy



**Need a new ride? Check out the largest site for U.S. used car 
listings at AOL Autos.  
(http://autos.aol.com/used?NCID=aolcmp0030002851)

Re: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Westgold]

MisunderstoodHello everybody.  I have been reading all your stories, and want 
you to know that I pray for all of you everyday.  I do not have TM, I joined 
this list because my dear friend has it.  I am disabled with arthritis and 
sarcoidosis.  Because I can't go out anymore, I have learned to make a very 
good living working on the internet, sitting down.  I will make over $100K this 
year from my chair.  If there are any of you who would like to get a little 
business going on the web, to either supplement your benefits or so you'll be 
able to quit your job, please let me know.  I'll be very happy to help you in 
any way I can, I do understand your situations.  I know that some of you cannot 
afford PT or other therapies that would help you. It's easy to bring in a 
couple thousand a month, or you can do more and bring in more. I will work with 
you to help you meet your income needs.  Please contact me privately if you are 
interested in learning more. Send me your number & I'll give you a call.  
[EMAIL PROTECTED]   

take care -- Michelle 

RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Butcher, Bernard G (NY80)]

I have fallen a few times when home alone - but I usually have my cell
phone on me, call my neighbor - a NYC fireman who helps - - - other
times I have crawled to my basement stairs, down a few steps & use the
hand rail to get on my butt on a step & then stand.
 
BERNARD BUTCHER
 



From: Robert Pall [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 2:34 PM
To: Akua; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood


If one lives alone and fears what will happen if they fall and can't get
up, they should have a medic alert button or something similar which at
a press of a button contacts medic alert who then dispatches medical
help. I believe this is a fairly minimal expense...which could save our
lives!
 
Rob in New Jersey



From: Akua [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 2:26 PM
To: tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood



. I fear falling and no one will be there to help pick me up!
This is what I must come to term with.


This happened to me on February 29, 2008 at 9:45 am and November 14,
2005 at 3:04 a.m.
In 2005, I lost the ability to walk as I returned from the bathroom. I
crawled into my bedroom,  pulled on clothes
called the cat lady so that she could open the front door  then called
911 ( I didn't want them to break down the front door as I live alone).

On the 29th in my new bathroom and newly returned-to home, my char slid
away from me as I attempted
to move off my commode. God help me I said as I slid to the floor.
Workmen were right by the window
and I yelled for them to come back later

I can't even crawl and so slid a pad under me and
back-rowed/slid myself into my bedroom, rolling on the floor, dressed
myself, called 911 to put me back in the chair.

It was the perfect storm of undone stuff, the workmen were there to put
in my phone line (That they had removed and forgotten about) so i could
use my button and i was expecting some rubbermaid mats to keep the chair
from sliding.

So you can survive falling alone.
I would prefer to have companionship, but as I was living happily alone
before TM I hope to get back to independence once again.

Akua
-- 

RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Robert Pall]

If one lives alone and fears what will happen if they fall and can't get
up, they should have a medic alert button or something similar which at
a press of a button contacts medic alert who then dispatches medical
help. I believe this is a fairly minimal expense...which could save our
lives!
 
Rob in New Jersey



From: Akua [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 2:26 PM
To: tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood



. I fear falling and no one will be there to help pick me up!
This is what I must come to term with.


This happened to me on February 29, 2008 at 9:45 am and November 14,
2005 at 3:04 a.m.
In 2005, I lost the ability to walk as I returned from the bathroom. I
crawled into my bedroom,  pulled on clothes
called the cat lady so that she could open the front door  then called
911 ( I didn't want them to break down the front door as I live alone).

On the 29th in my new bathroom and newly returned-to home, my char slid
away from me as I attempted
to move off my commode. God help me I said as I slid to the floor.
Workmen were right by the window
and I yelled for them to come back later

I can't even crawl and so slid a pad under me and
back-rowed/slid myself into my bedroom, rolling on the floor, dressed
myself, called 911 to put me back in the chair.

It was the perfect storm of undone stuff, the workmen were there to put
in my phone line (That they had removed and forgotten about) so i could
use my button and i was expecting some rubbermaid mats to keep the chair
from sliding.

So you can survive falling alone.
I would prefer to have companionship, but as I was living happily alone
before TM I hope to get back to independence once again.

Akua
-- 

RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Akua]

. I fear falling and no one will be there to help pick me up! This 
is what I must come to term with.


This happened to me on February 29, 2008 at 9:45 am and November 14, 
2005 at 3:04 a.m.
In 2005, I lost the ability to walk as I returned from the bathroom. 
I crawled into my bedroom,  pulled on clothes
called the cat lady so that she could open the front door  then 
called 911 ( I didn't want them to break down the front door as I 
live alone).


On the 29th in my new bathroom and newly returned-to home, my char 
slid away from me as I attempted
to move off my commode. God help me I said as I slid to the floor. 
Workmen were right by the window

and I yelled for them to come back later

I can't even crawl and so slid a pad under me and
back-rowed/slid myself into my bedroom, rolling on the floor, dressed 
myself, called 911 to put me back in the chair.


It was the perfect storm of undone stuff, the workmen were there to 
put in my phone line (That they had removed and forgotten about) so i 
could use my button and i was expecting some rubbermaid mats to keep 
the chair from sliding.


So you can survive falling alone.
I would prefer to have companionship, but as I was living happily 
alone before TM I hope to get back to independence once again.


Akua
--

Fw: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[ROBERT DIEHL]

my care giver was a nurses aide for 21 years ...so she reads all my e mail from 
the tm web site and has read the about tm itself ...she pretty well knows whwat 
i going thru and knows i'm about a good as i going to get...
i'm very thankful for her careing for me...i have to have a catherter in me the 
rest of my life because my blatter doesn't operate any more because of tm
- Original Message - 
From: Jenna 
To: Butcher, Bernard G (NY80) ; tmic-list@eskimo.com 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 10:21 AM
Subject: Re: [TMIC] Misunderstood


Bernie, Keep your spirits up!!  We care about you and how you are doing.  
Jenna 



- Original Message 
From: "Butcher, Bernard G (NY80)" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: Robert Pall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 10:12:19 AM
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood


Hi Rob - I can relate. My wife and especially my son - seem to not care & leave 
obstacles in my way (I walk with walker only) - I think they do care, but are 
equally angry and confused about this as I am - I got promoted (or demoted) 
from TM to MS in February '08. before this all happened, I did Everything - 
mowed, shoveled snow, fixed cars and appliances, painted & patched, and played 
golf (badly), now none of those.

BERNARD BUTCHER





From: Robert Pall [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 8:51 AM
To: tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: [TMIC] Misunderstood


Thanks to all of the group who responded to my question! Other than a 
couple of  members who stated that their spouses try their best to understand, 
including going to symposiums, reading from the list etc., most of the others 
seem to share my frustrations making our loved ones understand what we go thru 
24/7. Many members have gotten divorced over our condition either because there 
spouses did not understand or did not care enough. This to me is both sad and 
frustrating! I have tried my best to explain to my wife how difficult my daily 
life is. She believes that giving sympathy will make me worse ands she chooses 
to treat me normally hoping I will act normally…I usually come close to her 
wishes…however there are times when I just need a hug, some sympathy and most 
importantly some understanding. I know this will not happen…therefore I have to 
come to terms with how I personally will deal with this. I know I want to stop 
working, move someplace warm and spend the rest of my life answering to only 
myself…this may come to pass…however deep in my mind I fear being alone. I fear 
falling and no one will be there to help pick me up! This is what I must come 
to term with.

As an aside my wife told me that when I started up the New Jersey 
support group and started talking to members I tended to feel worse about 
myself…I think this is bull but how do you explain to someone who can't 
understandand won't even try!

Thanks for letting me vent again! 

Rob In New Jersey 






Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.

[TMIC] YAY ASHLEE!!!!

[Akua]

Ashlee's accomplishments are to be celebrated and held high!
Tell her congratulations from someone who knows
that she worked hard and overcame a lot .
I am moved that you are proud, I applaud you
as a parent  who created and supports such
a wonderful young person. She is what the
world needs and I am gratified to  share
this joy.
Thank you!!

Akua
--
http://www.akuadesigns.etsy.com
http://www.artfarm.com
http://www.absolutearts.com/portfolios/a/akualezli/

Re: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Jenna]

Bernie, Keep your spirits up!!  We care about you and how you are doing.  
Jenna



- Original Message 
From: "Butcher, Bernard G (NY80)" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: Robert Pall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 10:12:19 AM
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood


Hi Rob - I can relate. My wife and especially my son - seem to not care & leave 
obstacles in my way (I walk with walker only) - I think they do care, but are 
equally angry and confused about this as I am - I got promoted (or demoted) 
from TM to MS in February '08. before this all happened, I did Everything - 
mowed, shoveled snow, fixed cars and appliances, painted & patched, and played 
golf (badly), now none of those.
 
BERNARD BUTCHER
 




From: Robert Pall [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 8:51 AM
To: tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: [TMIC] Misunderstood


Thanks to all of the group who responded to my question! Other than a 
couple of  members who stated that their spouses try their best to understand, 
including going to symposiums, reading from the list etc., most of the others 
seem to share my frustrations making our loved ones understand what we go thru 
24/7. Many members have gotten divorced over our condition either because there 
spouses did not understand or did not care enough. This to me is both sad and 
frustrating! I have tried my best to explain to my wife how difficult my daily 
life is. She believes that giving sympathy will make me worse ands she chooses 
to treat me normally hoping I will act normally…I usually come close to her 
wishes…however there are times when I just need a hug, some sympathy and most 
importantly some understanding. I know this will not happen…therefore I have to 
come to terms with how I personally will deal with this. I know I want to stop 
working, move
 someplace warm and spend the rest of my life answering to only myself…this may 
come to pass…however deep in my mind I fear being alone. I fear falling and no 
one will be there to help pick me up! This is what I must come to term with.
As an aside my wife told me that when I started up the New Jersey 
support group and started talking to members I tended to feel worse about 
myself…I think this is bull but how do you explain to someone who can't 
understandand won't even try!
Thanks for letting me vent again! 
Rob In New Jersey 


  

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RE: [TMIC] Misunderstood

[Butcher, Bernard G (NY80)]

Hi Rob - I can relate. My wife and especially my son - seem to not care
& leave obstacles in my way (I walk with walker only) - I think they do
care, but are equally angry and confused about this as I am - I got
promoted (or demoted) from TM to MS in February '08. before this all
happened, I did Everything - mowed, shoveled snow, fixed cars and
appliances, painted & patched, and played golf (badly), now none of
those.
 
BERNARD BUTCHER
 



From: Robert Pall [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 8:51 AM
To: tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: [TMIC] Misunderstood



Thanks to all of the group who responded to my question! Other
than a couple of  members who stated that their spouses try their best
to understand, including going to symposiums, reading from the list
etc., most of the others seem to share my frustrations making our loved
ones understand what we go thru 24/7. Many members have gotten divorced
over our condition either because there spouses did not understand or
did not care enough. This to me is both sad and frustrating! I have
tried my best to explain to my wife how difficult my daily life is. She
believes that giving sympathy will make me worse ands she chooses to
treat me normally hoping I will act normally...I usually come close to
her wishes...however there are times when I just need a hug, some
sympathy and most importantly some understanding. I know this will not
happen...therefore I have to come to terms with how I personally will
deal with this. I know I want to stop working, move someplace warm and
spend the rest of my life answering to only myself...this may come to
pass...however deep in my mind I fear being alone. I fear falling and no
one will be there to help pick me up! This is what I must come to term
with.

As an aside my wife told me that when I started up the New
Jersey support group and started talking to members I tended to feel
worse about myself...I think this is bull but how do you explain to
someone who can't understandand won't even try!

Thanks for letting me vent again! 

Rob In New Jersey 

Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[Jenna]

Well tell Ashlee congratulations from us!  You are a great mom, keeping up with 
this list!  I am glad her sore is getting better.  That is good news!
 Jenna 



- Original Message 
From: Tracey L. Black <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 9:49:15 AM
Subject: RE: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM


"I think there is a lot of good information on this site for caretakers. "
 
This is exactly why I stay on this list. I also want to thank you all for your 
responses when I asked about my daughter's sore. It is doing much better since 
the Dr gave me the antibiotic ointment to put on it. She has been very good 
about making sure that she treats it two times a day.
Also, if I can brag for just a moment, Ashlee got straight A's on this report 
card. She is on the Distinguished Honor Roll this term!!!  Despite what she has 
been through over the last 3 years with TM, she is still able to get straight 
A's!!!
 
 
Tracey L. Black
Certified Insurance Service Representative
Hockley & O'Donnell Insurance Agency
Phone - 717-334-6741, x 29
Fax - 717-334-3414
 
Thank you for providing information to us. Please beware that no coverage is 
bound and no change to your insurance program is confirmed until verified by a 
licensed agent during regular business hours. If you do not hear from us within 
1 business day, please re-contact us in case your information has not been 
retained.
 




From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 12:25 AM
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM


My Dear Friend Sandy,
 
I think that you are a wonderful partner for Terry.  One of the things that 
makes you this great partner is that you have gotten involved in being a part 
this group to learn about all the aspects that "we" TM'ers deal with on a daily 
basis.  That has given you a great deal of insight and I would think has made 
it easier for you to relate to his issues as a normal part of this.  Even 
though we are all different, in so many ways, we have so many common 
complaints/problems/residuals, etc.
 
This doesn't in any way mean that you weren't committed to your marriage and 
wouldn't have done the same thing that you are already doing to make your lives 
as good as you can now.  I think it just means that you have more understanding 
of what kind of things are going on and that you can also give him feedback 
from the group.
 
I certainly wish I could get my husband Pete to read some of the messages.  He 
won't, so I stopped pushing.  I think it's like therapy, it is for me anyway.  
I think there is a lot of good information on this site for caretakers. 
 
Hugs to you and Terry, Barbara
 
 






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know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile.  Try it now.  
http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ

RE: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM

[Tracey L. Black]

"I think there is a lot of good information on this site for caretakers.
"
 
This is exactly why I stay on this list. I also want to thank you all
for your responses when I asked about my daughter's sore. It is doing
much better since the Dr gave me the antibiotic ointment to put on it.
She has been very good about making sure that she treats it two times a
day.
Also, if I can brag for just a moment, Ashlee got straight A's on this
report card. She is on the Distinguished Honor Roll this term!!!
Despite what she has been through over the last 3 years with TM, she is
still able to get straight A's!!!
 
 
Tracey L. Black
Certified Insurance Service Representative
Hockley & O'Donnell Insurance Agency
Phone - 717-334-6741, x 29
Fax - 717-334-3414
 

Thank you for providing information to us. Please beware that no
coverage is bound and no change to your insurance program is confirmed
until verified by a licensed agent during regular business hours. If you
do not hear from us within 1 business day, please re-contact us in case
your information has not been retained.

 



From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 12:25 AM
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; tmic-list@eskimo.com
Subject: Re: [TMIC] Thanks to the list/understanding TM


My Dear Friend Sandy,
 
I think that you are a wonderful partner for Terry.  One of the things
that makes you this great partner is that you have gotten involved in
being a part this group to learn about all the aspects that "we" TM'ers
deal with on a daily basis.  That has given you a great deal of insight
and I would think has made it easier for you to relate to his issues as
a normal part of this.  Even though we are all different, in so many
ways, we have so many common complaints/problems/residuals, etc.
 
This doesn't in any way mean that you weren't committed to your marriage
and wouldn't have done the same thing that you are already doing to make
your lives as good as you can now.  I think it just means that you have
more understanding of what kind of things are going on and that you can
also give him feedback from the group.
 
I certainly wish I could get my husband Pete to read some of the
messages.  He won't, so I stopped pushing.  I think it's like therapy,
it is for me anyway.  I think there is a lot of good information on this
site for caretakers. 
 
Hugs to you and Terry, Barbara
 
 





It's Tax Time! Get tips, forms and advice on AOL Money & Finance
 .

[TMIC] Misunderstood

[Robert Pall]

Thanks to all of the group who responded to my question! Other
than a couple of  members who stated that their spouses try their best
to understand, including going to symposiums, reading from the list
etc., most of the others seem to share my frustrations making our loved
ones understand what we go thru 24/7. Many members have gotten divorced
over our condition either because there spouses did not understand or
did not care enough. This to me is both sad and frustrating! I have
tried my best to explain to my wife how difficult my daily life is. She
believes that giving sympathy will make me worse ands she chooses to
treat me normally hoping I will act normally...I usually come close to
her wishes...however there are times when I just need a hug, some
sympathy and most importantly some understanding. I know this will not
happen...therefore I have to come to terms with how I personally will
deal with this. I know I want to stop working, move someplace warm and
spend the rest of my life answering to only myself...this may come to
pass...however deep in my mind I fear being alone. I fear falling and no
one will be there to help pick me up! This is what I must come to term
with.
As an aside my wife told me that when I started up the New
Jersey support group and started talking to members I tended to feel
worse about myself...I think this is bull but how do you explain to
someone who can't understandand won't even try!
Thanks for letting me vent again!

Rob In New Jersey