According to Kyle:
Apparently, Google is not my friend this time, as I can find no information about this problem, and I appear to be the only one experiencing it, and only on this machine.
Correction: I actually did find [1], and that appears to be my exact problem, but it is also unsolved. Please help. Thanks.
[1] https://bbs.archlinux.org/viewtopic.php?id=130201 ~Kyle
