A programmer and a software engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from San Jose to Bangalore. The programmer leans over to the software engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The software engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The programmer persists and explains that the game is real easy and great fun. He explains "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $10. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $10.". Again, the software engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The programmer, now some what agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $10, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $100!" This catches the software engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The programmer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The software engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a ten dollar bill and hands it to the programmer. Now, it's the software engineer's turn. He asks the programmer "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The programmer looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers all to no avail. After about an hour, he wakes the software engineer and hands him $100. The software engineer politely takes the $100 and turns away to try to get back to sleep. The programmer, more than a little miffed, shakes the software engineer and asks "Well, so what's the answer?" Without a word, the software engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the programmer $10, and turns away to get back to sleep. A guy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for a week." The guy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to his pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do anything you want." Again the guy took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The guy said, "Listen, I'm a software engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool." At a recent real-time Java conference, the participants were given an awkward question to answer: "If you had just boarded an airliner and discovered that your team of programmers had been responsible for the flight control software, how many of you would disembark immediately?" Among the forest of raised hands only one man sat motionless. When asked what he would do, he replied that he would be quite content to stay aboard. With his team's software, he said, the plane was unlikely to even taxi as far as the runway, let alone take off. You Want to Marry a Software Engineer ... 1) What quality do you value most in your partner? a) A sense of humor b) Emotional maturity. c) High bandwidth. 2) When you get home at the end of the day, you like to: a) Turn on the Silicon Valley Business report, and eat dinner. b) Hook up to your ISP, and check out the hit count on your web page. c) Recharge your cell phone, laptop, and wireless modem, change batteries on your pager, and resynchronize your Palm Pilot and home computer. 3) Your ideal partner is: a) Interesting and attractive. b) Emotionally mature and understanding. c) Extensible and polymorphic. 4) In spiritually difficult times, you often turn to: a) Dilbert b) Kernighan and Ritchie c) comp.lang.c++ 5) If go over to your partner's place and think it's a mess, you would: a) Complain to him/her, and tell them to tidy up. b) Call a maid service. c) Make clean 6) What kind of car would you like to buy next, and why? a) A BMW, because people will see that I am rich and successful. b) A Jeep, because it's youthful, rugged, and won't break down. c) A Honda because the engine control computer can be hacked for more horsepower. 7) Name the 4 essential food groups: a) Fruit, vegetables, meat, dairy. b) Coffee, chocolate, takeout, ice cream. c) rec.food.cooking, rec.food.veg, ba.food, alt.food.chocolate 8) You like to travel with your partner because: a) You share new experiences together. b) You learn about each other in different situations. c) You get more use out of your wireless modem. 9) You think a relationship is ready for a permanent commitment because: a) You've successfully struggled through several years of good and bad times. b) You're already living together, so you might as well tie the knot. c) You finally got your local network configured just right. 10) If you and your partner got married, you would want to: a) Keep your last name. b) Change your last name. c) Combine your names with a hyphen. d) Combine your names with an underscore. 11) You and your partner think it's time to have children when: a) Your stock options are vested. b) You've agreed on the requirements and design. c) You've come up with a good naming convention. d) You really understand the use of multiple inheritance. _______________________________________________________________________________ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org Platinum Sponsor: www.rmsportal.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are"
