I am glad you all enjoyed it. Came from a Houstonian--your and our
friend Dil Deka.
At 7:14 PM -0500 3/12/07, Rajen & Ajanta Barua wrote:
Chandan:
That is great, funny and very intellectual I should say.
But did you noticed that they failed to mention the main event of
the Bengalis, the P for PUJA.
Rajen
----- Original Message -----
From: <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]>Chan Mahanta
To: <mailto:assam@assamnet.org>assam@assamnet.org
Sent: Monday, March 12, 2007 11:17 AM
Subject: Re: [Assam] Fwd: Bangla alphabet
Henjoy!
*A* is for Awpheesh (as in Office). This is where the average
Kolkakatan goes and spends a day hard at work. And if he works for
the 'Vest Bengal
Gawrment' he will arrive at 10, wipe his forehead till 11, have a
tea break at 12, throw around a few files at 12.30, break for lunch
at 1, smoke an
unfiltered cigarette at 2, break or tea at 3, sleep sitting down at
4 and go home at 4:30. It's a hard life!
*B* is for Bhision. For some reason many Bengalis don't have good
bhision. In fact in Kolkata most people are wearing spectacles all
the time.
*C* is for Chappell. Currently, this is the Bengali word for the
Devil, for the worst form of evil. In the night mothers put their
kids to sleep saying,
'Na ghumaley Chappell eshey dhorey niye jabe.'
*D* is for Debashish or any other name starting with Deb. By an
ancient law every fourth Bengali Child has to be named Debashish.
So you have a
Debashish everywhere and trying to get creative they are also
called Deb, Debu, Deba with variations like Debopriyo, Deboprotim,
Debojyoti, etc. thrown in at times.
*E* is for Eeesh. This is a very common Bengali exclamation made
famous by Aishwarya Rai in the movie Devdas. It is estimated that
on an average a
Bengali, especially Bengali women, use eeesh 10,089 times every
year. 'Ei Morechhey' is a close second to Eeesh.
*F* is for Feeesh. These are creatures that swim in river and seas
and are a favourite food of the Bengalis. Despite the fact that a
fish market has
such strong smells, with one sniff a Bengali knows if a fish is all
right. If not, he will say 'eeesh what feeesh is theesh!'
*G* is for Good name. Every Bengali boy will have a good name like
Debashish or Deboprotim and a pet name like Motka, Bhombol, Thobla,
etc. While every
Bengali girls will have pet names like Tia, Tuktuki, Mishti, Khuku,
et cetera.
*H* is for Harmonium. This the Bengali equivalent of a rock guitar.
Take four Bengalis and a Harmonium and you have the successors to
The Bheatles!
*I* is for lleesh. This is a feeesh with 10,000 bones which would
kill any ordinary person, but which the Bengalis eat with releeesh!
*J* is for Jhola. No selfrespecting Bengali is complete without his
Jhola. It is a shapeless cloth bag where he keeps all his
belongings and he fits an
amazing number of things in. Even as you read this there are two
million jholas bobbling around Kolkata, and they all look exactly
the same! Note
that 'Jhol' as in Maachher Jhol is a close second.
*K* is for Kee Kaando !. It used to be the favourite Bengali
exclamation till eeesh took over because of Aishwarya Rai (now Kee
Kando's agent is
trying to hire Bipasha Basu).
*L* is for Lungi, the dress for all occasions. People in Kolkata
manage to play football and cricket wearing it not to mention the
daily trip in the
morning to the local bajaar. Now there is talk of a lungi
expedition to Mt Everest.
*M* is for Minibus. These are dangerous half buses whose antics
would effortlessly frighten the living daylights out of all James
Bond stuntmen as
well as Formula 1 race car drivers.
*N* is for Nangto. This is the Bengali word for Naked. It is the
most interesting naked word in any language!
*O* is for Oil. The Bengalis believe that a touch of mustard oil
will cure anything from cold (oil in the nose), to earache (oil in
the ear), to cough
(oil on the throat) to piles (oil you know where!).
*P* is for Phootball. This is always a phavourite phassion of the
Kolkattan. Every Bengali is born an expert in this game. The two
biggest clubs there
are Mohunbagan and East Bengal and when they play the city comes to a stop.
*Q* is for Queen. This really has nothing to do with the Bengalis
or Kolkata, but it's the only Q word I could think of at this
moment. There's
also Quilt but they never use them in Kolkata.
*R* is for Robi Thakur. Many many years ago Rabindranath got the
Nobel Prize. This has given the right to all Bengalis no matter
where they are to
frame their acceptance speeches as if they were directly related to
the great poet and walk with their head held high. This also gives
Bengalis the
birthright to look down at Delhi and Mumbai and of course 'all
non-Bengawlees'! Note that 'Rawshogolla' comes a close second !
*S* is for Shourav. Now that they finally produced a genuine
cricketer and a captain, Bengalis think that he should be allowed
to play until he is 70
years old. Of course they will see to it that he stays in good form
by doing a little bit of 'jawggo' and 'maanot'.
*T* is for Trams. Hundred years later there are still trams in
Kolkata. Of course if you are in a hurry it's faster to walk.
*U* is for Aambrela. When a Bengali baby is born he is handed one.
*V* is for Bhaayolence. Bengalis are the most non-violent violent
people around. When an accident happens they will fold up their
sleeves, shout and
scream and curse and abuse, "Chherey De Bolchhi" but the last time
someone actually hit someone was in 1979.
*W* is for Water. For three months of the year the city is
underwater and every year for the last 200 years the authorities
are taken by surprise by this!
*X* is for X'mas. It's very big in Kolkata, with Park Street fully
lit up and all Bengalis agreeing that they must eat cake that day.
*Y* is for Yesshtaarday. Which is always better than today for a
Bengali (see R for Robi Thakur).
*Z* is for Jebra, Joo, Jipper and Jylophone.
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executioners - Albert Camus
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