Hi,
A few hours back I had to ask a girl to shut up in the computer lab or go outside to continue her conversation (ofcourse I was at my politest - given that this was the first time in USA I had the opportunity to ask anyone to get out.) Ofcourse she left soon with an ashen face.
On turning my back to talk to her - I found that she was an African American girl talking to a white guy --very very loudly --obviously very happy in talking about something which was the in-thing ---and might attract attention of backward looking brown skinned Asian guys (I was the only one there). She was getting great kicks about egging that guy to go after some other guy they both knew. Most likely these were from the Summer School for high school kids and did not know the rules of the computer lab --and had just met and were exchanging notes about other classmates.
She was also saying how she nearly became a lesbian also - after seeing her father mistreat her mother --i wonder about that connection!
I have noticed that girls feel very comfortable with gay men (the one or two in my batch - though not in my program) --since they do not have to fear from them --about sexual assaults etc. On the other hand -- some girls can draw a vicarious pleasure of unleashing these guys --on other guys --who might be tormenting them or avoiding them.
However, Guys are not so comfortable with gay women(lesbians) --becos Gay women would still maintain their distance with men in general --for fear of sexual assault.
A gay woman cannot sexually assault another woman - given her physical attributes ---but a gay man can --and sometimes does assault another man (Gay or otherwise - incldung boys.) Thus, men in general are much more wary of gay men --than women are vary of gay women.
Further, since --like in case of paedophile men -- in is impossible to tell from the face of person whether he is gay or not --- and even if u know that he is -- u never know when he might start trying to "ensnare" u . Some of them do ensnare boys and men to suit their ends http://www.thecouriermail.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5936,15696389%255E36399,00.html
I learnt that many of the senior people I have known at Harvard are also Gay -- so I wondered whether it is wise to still talk about Gay issues --- I feel just like women keep shrilly (rightly) talking about sexual harrassment -- though most men do not harrass them --similarly --now it is time that men also raise their voice about harrassment by Gay men --though not all gay men would be harrassing them.
Women need not raise their voice about harrassment by lesbians --becos --there is negligible chance that women in general can be raped by lesbians.
Is it wrong for men to fear attack by "some" gay men and talk about it---esp in USA where so many are around?
Umesh
PS: Some more weblinks:
A general website on this assault stuff
AIDS more in Gay men: study by John Hopkins Univ.
Photos on same sex marriage in Harvard/MIT area - Cambridge --http://www.boston.com/news/specials/gay_marriage/gallery/cambridge2/
Same Sex marriage in Massachusetts
Dog rape in US also:
Yahoo! Messenger NEW - crystal clear PC to PC calling worldwide with voicemail
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