Re: An existence for eternal freedom
I feel like the pentameter jumps all over the place, there’s no sense or pattern to it, no flow. I also feel like at some point there are too many words of the same ending being used in rather close conjunction with each other, degrading from the experience. Finally, I don’t sense a strong theme in the poem, it feels like a lot of it was slapped on the whim and with no purpose.
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