Hi Jie and Stewart,
Thank you for your replies. We have updated the document according to Jie’s
response and have a few followup questions/comments.
>>> 4) <!-- [rfced] Please review the use of RFC 4364 as a reference for
>>> L3VPN in the following text as we don't see L3VPN or layer 3 in
>>> that document.
>>>
>>> Original:
>>> Examples of technologies to provide VPN services are: IPVPN [RFC2764],
>>> L2VPN [RFC4664], L3VPN [RFC4364], and EVPN [RFC7432].
>
> Although it is well known that RFC 4364 is about L3VPN, I agree L3VPN or
> layer-3 is not used explicitly in that document. It uses IP VPN instead.
>
> In this draft we can follow that way and replace L3VPN with IP VPN.
1) Note that we have updated the citation tag for RFC 4364 to appear after
"IPVPN [RFC2764]". Additionally, should "IPVPN" have a space between "IP" and
"VPN" based on its use RFCs 2764 and 4364?
Current:
Examples of technologies to provide VPN services are
as follows: IPVPN [RFC2764] [RFC4364], L2VPN [RFC4664], and EVPN
[RFC7432].
Perhaps:
Examples of technologies to provide VPN services are
as follows: IP VPN [RFC2764] [RFC4364], L2VPN [RFC4664], and EVPN
[RFC7432].
>>>
>>> 12) <!--[rfced] FYI - we have broken this long sentence into a bulleted
>>> list for the ease of the reader. Please review and ensure we
>>> have maintained your intended meaning.
>>>
>>> Original:
>>> Based on the set of network resource partitions provided by the
>>> physical network infrastructure, multiple NRPs can be created, each
>>> with a set of dedicated or shared network resources allocated from
>>> the physical underlay network, and each can be associated with a
>>> customized logical network topology, so as to meet the requirements
>>> of different enhanced VPN services or different groups of enhanced
>>> VPN services.
>>>
>>> Current:
>>> Based on the set of network resource partitions provided by the
>>> physical network infrastructure, multiple NRPs can be created. Each
>>> of these NRPs:
>>>
>>> * has a set of dedicated or shared network resources allocated from
>>> the physical underlay network, and
>>>
>>> * can be associated with a customized logical network topology so as
>>> to meet the requirements of different enhanced VPN services or
>>> different groups of enhanced VPN services.
>>> -->
>
> Actually the last sentence "so as to meet the requirements... " is related to
> both bullets.
>
> Maybe split it as a separate bullet?
2) Thank you for your suggestion! We have updated the text as follows. Please
let us know if any additional changes are needed.
Current:
Based on the set of network resource partitions provided by the
physical network infrastructure, multiple NRPs can be created. Each
of these NRPs:
* has a set of dedicated or shared network resources allocated from
the physical underlay network,
* can be associated with a customized logical network topology, and
* meets the requirements of different enhanced VPN services or
different groups of enhanced VPN services.
The updated files have been posted here (please refresh):
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732.txt
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732.pdf
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732.html
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732.xml
The diff files have been posted here:
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732-diff.html (comprehensive diff)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732-rfcdiff.html (side by side)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732-auth48diff.html (AUTH48 updates
only)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9732-auth48rfcdiff.html (side by side)
The details of the AUTH48 status of your document are here:
https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9732
Thank you,
RFC Editor/mc
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