There is no data on the machine, I tried to install the image from
SourceForge and it was too big...  I didn't keep any on the machine's
internal drive in the first place, there simply isn't room.

I got a version of Ubuntu working from a Flash card, but it was very slow,
and almost every dialogue box fails to fit on the screen.   And it won't
play MP3s or DIVXs... 

And they called me crazy for dissing the Air / Portegé / all subnotebooks...
 
I know this may or may not help, but will it not boot from an external
source if you hook up USB CD/DVD drive?

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