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NO MORE BOGEYMEN 
B Y  J E F F R E Y  L .  B R O W N ,  M . D . 


MOST PARENTS understand that fears are a normal part
of a child's development and that parents SHOULD be
protectors for their children. So, when dealing with
these fears, the goal is not to simply make them go
away but to use them to teach a child how to cope with
stressful situations and how to determine when to
really be afraid. After all, fears are an important
tool that we all use to avoid danger.

Whereas in the past it was common to simply ignore a
child's fears or brush them aside, today, the more
common mistake is to give too much attention to fears.
The parent's own anxiety causes her to talk too much.
And too much talking causes the message to be lost and
may make the child more nervous. Even worse, the child
learns that acting afraid (without actually being
afraid) is a sure way to get her parent's attention.
As a general rule, the younger the child is, the less
talking his parent should do. Finding the right way to
address a child's worries without giving too much
attention to them takes a little practice, but the
extra effort is very worthwhile.


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