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'  a little confused. Let me see if I have this straight.....



* If you grow up  in Hawaii  , raised by your grandparents, you're 'exotic' 
and  'different.'

* If you grow up  in Alaska eating mooseburgers,  It is a quintessential 
American  story.



* If your name  is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

* If you name  your kids Willow , Trig and Track, you're a mainstream 
patriotic  American.


* If you  graduate from Harvard law  School, you are unstable.

* If you attend 5  different small colleges before graduating, you're well  
grounded.





* If you spend 3  years as a brilliant community organizer, become the first 
black President  of the Harvard Law  Review, create a voter registration drive 
that registers 150,000  new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law 
professor,  spend 8  years as a State Senator  representing a district with 
over 
750,000 people, become chairman of the  state Senate's Health and Human 
Services committee, spend 4 years in the  United  States Senate representing a 
state of  13 million people while  sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the 
Foreign 
Affairs, Environment and  Public Works and Veteran 's Affairs committees, you 
don't have any real  leadership experience.

* If your total  resume is: local weather girl,  4 years on the city council 
and 6  years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as 
the  governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to  
become the country's second highest ranking  executive.




* If you ha ve  been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 
beautiful  daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real  
Christian.

* If you cheated  on your first wife with a rich heiress, and then left your 
disfigured wife  and married the heiress the next month, you're a good  
Christian.





* If you teach  responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the 
proper use of  birth control, you are eroding the fiber of  society.

* If , while  governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other 
option in  sex education in your state's school system while your unwed 
teenage  daughter ends up pregnant , you're very responsible.  





* If your wife  is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a 
prestigious  law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community,  
then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent  
America 's.

* If you're  husband is nicknamed 'First Dude',  with at least one DWI 
conviction  and no college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 
and  
once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from  the 
USA, your family is extremely admirable. 



OK,  I'm much clearer  now.




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