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Fore!

After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the 
clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get 
his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth 
hole about twenty minutes ago?" 
"Yes," the golfer responded. 
"Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the 
course?" 
"Yes, I did. How did you know?" he asked. 
"Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway 
and crashed through a driver's windshield. The car went out of control, 
crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it 
to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about 
it?" 
The golfer thought it over carefully and responded... 
"I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right 
thumb."



If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi? 
~Unknown
"There are still places where people think that the function of the media is to 
provide information. " 
~Don Rottenberg
"Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how 
dogs spend their lives." 
~Sue Murphy.








Cartoon used with permission





R.I.P. Boom! 

A man once counseled his son that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret 
was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his cornflakes every morning.

The son did this religiously, and he lived to the age of 93. When he died, he 
left 14 children, 28 grandchildren, 35 great-grandchildren , and a 15-foot hole 
in the wall of the crematorium. 


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