Several times in the past week or so, I’ve found myself on the road in
the early morning on my way to religion-related events. And in the
process I think I’ve had an epiphany: I’ve discovered my true religious
orientation.
I’m an Afternoonitarian.
I’ve read about the biology of the diurnal clock. Some of us are larks
who love the dawn and some of us are owls who don’t. I’ve always been an
owl. In fact, if it wasn’t for 8 a.m. freshman physics, who knows what
I’d be doing today?
But enough about genetics. On to tenets of faith.
The First Law of Afternoonitarianism: Nothing good ever happens early in
the morning that didn’t start the night before.
What happens in the morning? Traffic jams. Wars start.
Kids need to be roused and dressed.
How much happier would life be if the day started a
bit later?
The faith tradition I grew up in deals with the
early morning conundrum in a particularly interesting way: The Jewish
day actually ends/begins at sundown. So morning is actually evening,
sorta?
OTOH, there are whole sets of Jewish prayers that are
supposed to be said at an hour that I prefer not to be conscious.
So what I’m really looking for is a religion that says
I don’t need to focus on anything more important than the comics section
until noon. If I find it, I’ll make a donation.
(It’s a JOKE, folks…1:-{)> )
Listero count: Bruce My Boss overestimated the numbers a bit in last
week’s Sneak Peek. We’re not quite at the 3 million mark of subscribers
to this e-mail list. We do have 1,574, which is up 19 from two weeks
ago. Which ain’t so bad.
Here are some highlights from Saturday’s Religion section (and from
dallasnews.com/religion):
LOOSED PREACHER: Bishop T.D. Jakes is already famous as a pulpit
preacher, author and televangelist. How will he do as a movie producer?
We’ll find out soon enough. The pastor of the Potter’s House is the
force behind a film slated to open next week. “Women Thou Art Loosed” is
based on his book of the same name. That was religious self-help. This
is R-rated fiction about a woman who was abused as a child. But the
basic message of the power of Christ to free women from troubles in
their past is the same. Some therapists say the movie could trigger
painful memories for abuse victims. Some film experts say downbeat
religion-themed flicks have never made much of a splash in the box
office. But Bishop Jakes has a track record of success that is hard to
argue with. He’s in the movie playing — what else? — a pastor. Rel
Squadder Ira Hadnot tells us about the movie and the bishop.
MAN FOR ALL SEASONS — Ron Gruen is an 89-year-old Dallas philanthropist
with a special affinity for Jewish causes. He helped found a Richardson
congregation in 1974. And he designed the ark for the synagogue, the
cabinet used to hold the Torahs. He’s being honored later this year with
an honorary doctorate from Yeshiva University. His attitude is well
expressed in his explanation for why he designed the ark to appear old.
“A Jew who thinks in less than centuries is not realistic,” he said. “In
our history, these years are only a minute.” Frequent contributor
Harriet P. Gross is our guide to Mr. Gruen.
THE BIBLE IS NOT RATED PG — The Song of Solomon is a section of the
bible that rabbis and pastors have struggled with for centuries. How did
it get there? Many interpretations have claimed it’s a metaphor of how
God (or Jesus) feels about the Jewish people (or the church.) But it
sure doesn’t read like metaphor. The pastor of Denton Bible Church is
taking it straight. He reads it as wonderful instruction on
relationships and sexuality. And he’s teaching it just that way in a
series of conferences. Regular contributor Robin Galiano Russell gives a
G-rated explanation of the Rev. Tommy Nelson’s conference.
BAD THINGS, GOOD PEOPLE — Harriet is back with a guest column. Her
rabbi’s wife died recently. Karen Leynor was only 38 when she fell ill
in May. Harriet explains the traditional Jewish rituals for caring for
the dead and explores just a bit the greatest mystery of most faiths:
Why a loving God allows sorrow in the world.
WoW — The website this week is www.museumofhumor.com/sermons.htm. The
“new wing’ of the Museum of Humor website is devoted to sermons with a
funny spin. It covers a wide spectrum of faiths — and levels of
humor….1:-{)>
REVIEWS — Start with books. Jeff Zell likes a new work of fiction
modeled after The Screwtape Letters. The Devil’s Inbox is an update. I
give a lukewarm review to a book that looks at the long Disney cartoons
from a faith perspective. (If you’ve seen the movies, you pretty much
know what the book is going to say.) Robin gives high marks to a book of
essays written a while back by the author of The Red Tent. Piet Levy
says a book of teen spirituality written by teens hits more than it
misses. For magazines, Robert Plocheck looks at Image, What Is
Enlightenment and AARP Magazine.
Etc.
Sincerely,
yr hmbl srvnt,
Jeffrey Weiss
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
