<~*~><~*~><
Humor-Exprezz
<~*~><~*~><
You are subscribed to Humor-Exprezz because of a
request from you or someone impersonating your email
address.
If you would rather NOT be subscribed, you can send an email to:
[EMAIL PROTECTED] with the email
address you subscribed with.
The Asylum Time for Toons
Wanna see something funny??
wanna have a laugh?
Why not let our editor Nunizo,
send ya a toon or three?
and all for free clean toons for all ages..
send a blank e-mail to:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
<~*~><~*~>
In The News
<~*~><~*~>
A bag of bills stolen from a casino was snapped up by
beavers who wove thousands of dollars in soggy currency
into the sticks and brush of their dam on a creek in eastern
Louisiana.
"They hadn't torn the bills up. They were still whole," said
Martin Crane of the local sheriff's office.
The money was part of $75,000 taken last week from a
nearby casino robbery.
Deputies searched for the money for days until a lawyer,
hoping to make a deal with prosecutors for a client, called
and said the money had been discarded in the creek.
Officers searched the creek during the weekend, finding
one money bag right away and spotting a second down-
stream against the beaver dam.
The third bag of cash couldn't be found, Crane said, so
deputies started breaking down the beaver dam to drain
the pond it was holding. That was when they saw the dam's
expensive decoration. They eventually found the missing
bag, which the beavers hadn't completely emptied
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Home Depot-ConsumerTestingPanel
Sign up to test new products!
Get a chance for prizes and a $500 Gift Card!
<a href=" http://a.websponsors.com/c/s=29539/c=48792/ "> aol</a>
*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�
Fogie's Follies, Frolics & Funnies
It ain't your grandma's web site!
The FREE humor e-zine with jokes, lists, news, pictures,
quotes, videos, links, reader mail and, of course, Fogie's
Folly!!!
http://fogiesfollies.com
*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�*�
Today's Toons:
Interesting Coincidence
http://www.sydes.net/jokes/pictures/i/interesting_coincidence.jpg
Jokeworm Pics
<a href=" http://www.jokeworm.com/newcleanpics/ "> click</a>
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
http://www.humor-exprezz.com
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Did Ya Know Or Do Ya Care?
Americans drink over 13 billion gallons of soft drinks
each year.
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
The Asylum Sidewalk Jokes
Tiger has been out on the street..
well on the sidewalk anyway..
trying to find the best of the Clean Jokes around..
if you are interested.. and not scared..
then you too can subscribe to them..
by sending a blank e-mail to:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Oh, Yeah.. did I mention that they are free too??
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
I was carpooling with my friend Craig, he noticed that the
"Check oil" light was on. He pulled into the gas station,
got out of the car, opened the hood, checked the engine
oil, closed the hood, then got back into the car.
"Can we make a quick stop?" He asked.
"Sure," I replied, "what did you need to do?"
"I need to stop by the auto parts place to get a longer
dipstick."
"What do you need a longer one for?" I inquired.
"Because the one I got isn't long enough to reach the oil!"
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Those of us who worked at the front desk of a convention
hotel in Houston, Texas prided ourselves on making the
guests feel special. When someone arrived at reception,
credit card in hand, we would sneak a quick peek at it
and address him by name.
Once, during a check-in, one of our guests presented a
corporate credit card. "Welcome to Houston, Mr. Bell,"
the desk clerk said.
"Oh, please," the man replied, "call me Taco."
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Did Ya Know Or Do Ya Care?
Coca Cola, Hires Root Beer and Dr. Pepper were all
introduced in the same year, 1886.
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
http://www.humor-exprezz.com
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Today's Links:
Survival guide for living in a car
<a href=" http://www.carliving.com/ "> aol</a>
Holidaycrosswords.com
<a href=" http://www.holidaycrosswords.com/ "> aol</a>
A List of Excuses
<a href=" http://www.excuselist.com/ "> aol</a>
Jokeworm Jokes
<a href=" http://www.jokeworm.com/cleanjokes/ "> click</a>
Jokeworm Trivia
<a href=" http://www.jokeworm.com/trivia/ "> click</a>
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
There once was a rich man who was near death. He was
very grieved because he had worked so hard for his
money and he wanted to be able to take it with him to
heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take
some of his wealth with him.
An angel hears his plea and appears to him, "Sorry, but
you can't take your wealth with you."
The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He
might bend the rules.
The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him.
The angel reappears and informs the man that God has
decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him.
Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills
it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed.
Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates
of Heaven to greet St. Peter. Seeing the suitcase Peter
says, "Hold on, you can't bring that in here!"
But the man explains to him that he has permission and
asks him to verify his story with the Lord. Sure enough,
Peter checks and comes back saying, "You're right. You
are allowed one carry-on bag, but I'm supposed to check
its contents before letting it through."
Peter opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that
the man found too precious to leave behind and exclaims,
"You brought pavement?!!!" ( streets of gold)
<~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~><~*~>
Humor-Exprezz may contain links to sites on the
Internet which are owned and operated by third
parties. We are not responsible for the
availability of, and/or the content located on or
through, any such third-party sites.
All Content � By their Creators.
Subscribe address.. [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Unsub address ... [EMAIL PROTECTED]
(`'�.�(`'�.� �.�'�) �.�'�)
��HumorExprezz`�
(�.�'�(�.�'� `'�.�)`' �.�)
�.��
( `�.�
`�.� )
�.�)�
(.��
`*.
*.
Humor-Exprezz , HumorExprezz,
and Humor_Exprezz
are owned by humor-exprezz.com
10537 E Washington St
Indianapolis, In
46229
--
___________________________________________________________
Sign-up for Ads Free at Mail.com
http://promo.mail.com/adsfreejump.htm
_______________________________________________
Humor-Exprezz mailing list
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
http://emissives.com/mailman/listinfo/humor-exprezz_emissives.com