Where do you get them all from? Lots of friends with the type of job that I want - time on your hands. Can I join your mailing list. Or do you have one of your Artificial Intelligence Machines making them up. If so.....Natasha, that's one hell of a bot you've got there ;-) Gaz ""Natasha"" wrote in message [EMAIL PROTECTED]">news:[EMAIL PROTECTED]... > The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents > to > tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. > > The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their > stories. > Kathy said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens. > One > time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of > the > pickup when we hit a bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and > broke > and made a mess." > > "And what's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher > > "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" > > "Very good," said the teacher.Next little Lucy raised and hand and said, > "Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. > We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live > chicks and the moral to this story is, > > don't count your chickens until they're hatched." > > "That was a fine story Lucy. Johnny, do you have a story to share?" > > "Yes, ma'am, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Karen. Aunt > Karen > was a flight engineer in Afghanistan and her plane got hit. She had to > bail > out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a > machine > gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't > break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 bin Laden's > troops. She > killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of > bullets, > then she killed twenty more with the machete till the blade broke and > then > she killed Osama bin Laden and the last ten with her bare hands. > > "Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did your > daddy tell you from that horrible story? > > "Don't mess with Aunt Karen when she's been drinking!" > ----------------------------------------- > > ROMANCE MATHEMATICS > > Smart man + smart woman = romance > Smart man + dumb woman = affair > Dumb man + smart woman = marriage > Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy > > OFFICE ARITHMETIC > > Smart boss + smart employee = profit > Smart boss + dumb employee = production > Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion > Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime > > SHOPPING MATH > > A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. > A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need. > > GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS > > A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. > A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. > A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. > A successful woman is one who can find such a man. > > HAPPINESS > > To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a > little. > To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to > understand her at all. > > LONGEVITY > > Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot > more willing to die. > > MEMORY > > Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two > people remembering the same thing. > > APPEARANCE > > Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow > deteriorate during the night. > > PROPENSITY TO CHANGE > > A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. > A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. > > DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE > > A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after > that is the beginning of a new argument. > > COMPREHENSION > > There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before > marriage and after marriage > > HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED: > > Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs > and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started > doing the same thing to them at funerals. > > -- > Natasha Flazynski > CCNA, MCSE > http://www.ciscobot.com > My Cisco information site. > http://www.botbuilders.com > Artificial Intelligence and Linux development > ------------------------------------------------ Message Posted at: http://www.groupstudy.com/form/read.php?f=7&i=20729&t=20606 -------------------------------------------------- FAQ, list archives, and subscription info: http://www.groupstudy.com/list/cisco.html Report misconduct and Nondisclosure violations to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
