--- Hi all, I just got back from the Drs. WBC 6 hemg 13 platelets 370,000. My platetlets are up from 270,000 in 6 weeks. I don't like that as I have had platelets in the millions. It seemed strange that my WBC stayed the same but the platelets were creeping up. Anyone else had this problem? I agree that living with CML has been hard. I am reaching my one year anniversary in Jan. The first few months were the hardest, but everyday is a struggle. I get up in the morning; ask God to give me this day; wash my face, head for the coffee pot and live the day just for the day that I have. I don't worry about the future; I might not have one; and the past is gone forever; so one day at a time. Remember the song : ONE DAY AT A TIME SWEET JESUS"? Try to do something to help someone each day and give our love ones a treat now and then. I walk everyday even when I don't feel like it. It seems I always feel better after a walk. I use to power walk but now I'm just happy to get out there and smell the roses hehe. I am a widow; lost my hubby to heart problems 6 years ago and I had a lot of grief over this; it seems after the grief lifted; I was dx with CML; always something right??? Keeping my mind busy helps a lot. I work on my hobby daily which is genealogy. Blessing to all and Merry Christmas. Jeanie<3 In [EMAIL PROTECTED], "Patricia" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > Lynne, It is such a relief to know that someone, somewhere really does > know how I feel. I try not to complain around my family but sometimes > it just subconciously comes out without me wanting it to. It's hard to > be strong for the sake of others when you feel so bad so much of the > time(like every minute that you are awake). I just get sick and tired > of being "sick and tired". I have always been such a active person, > most times working 2 jobs and doing things with my children, > occassionally going out, always loved to entertain friends and family > and now I can't even do basic house cleaning around my home. The > emotional part of living with cml is taking me down as well as the > physical part of it. And I have always been a fighter, and now I don't > have the energy to fight. I live in fear that the cml is going to take > me out, and how unfair to have to spend your last days like this. > Sometimes it just overwhelms me. And it's not just the cml, you've got > all the other stuff in life going on. My husband left me about 2 > months after I was dx'd, which we did get back together after a 6 > month seperation but things just aren't the same anymore for either of > us, and I don't have the energy to devote much to the relationship if > you know what I'm saying. So the cml and gleevec have changed my life > in every way possible. And when I'm not hiding in the bathroom crying, > I'm mad as hell at the world. I feel as though something inside me has > died. Nothing interests me....not even Christmas. I could probably > force enough energy over several days to decorate for Xmas but just > have no interest. I am depressed and I was taking lexapro but my > primary doctor changed it to Paxil CR just this week. I type all of > this about myself and when I reread it, I can't believe I am burdening > everyone with my problems. I have never been one to complain like > this. Forgive me but thank God you're here! > > Lynne, thank you and all the others for all the info. My main concern > is: you basically have to pack up and move to where ever the trial is > located and I don't know if I could afford fininacially to do that. > How long do you have to stay? I am on disability and living from one > month to another on SS. > > Sorry for the long post. Love, Peace, & Hope, Pat
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