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+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+       DRAMATIS PERSONAE
+
+
+DUKE SENIOR    living in banishment.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK his brother, an usurper of his dominions.
+
+
+AMIENS |
+       |  lords attending on the banished duke.
+JAQUES |
+
+
+LE BEAU        a courtier attending upon Frederick.
+
+CHARLES        wrestler to Frederick.
+
+
+OLIVER         |
+               |
+JAQUES (JAQUES DE BOYS:)       |  sons of Sir Rowland de Boys.
+               |
+ORLANDO                |
+
+
+ADAM   |
+       |  servants to Oliver.
+DENNIS |
+
+
+TOUCHSTONE     a clown.
+
+SIR OLIVER MARTEXT     a vicar.
+
+
+CORIN  |
+       |  shepherds.
+SILVIUS        |
+
+
+WILLIAM        a country fellow in love with Audrey.
+
+       A person representing HYMEN. (HYMEN:)
+
+ROSALIND       daughter to the banished duke.
+
+CELIA  daughter to Frederick.
+
+PHEBE  a shepherdess.
+
+AUDREY a country wench.
+
+       Lords, pages, and attendants, &c.
+       (Forester:)
+       (A Lord:)
+       (First Lord:)
+       (Second Lord:)
+       (First Page:)
+       (Second Page:)
+
+
+SCENE  Oliver's house; Duke Frederick's court; and the
+       Forest of Arden.
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT I
+
+
+
+SCENE I        Orchard of Oliver's house.
+
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO and ADAM]
+
+ORLANDO        As I remember, Adam, it was upon this fashion
+       bequeathed me by will but poor a thousand crowns,
+       and, as thou sayest, charged my brother, on his
+       blessing, to breed me well: and there begins my
+       sadness. My brother Jaques he keeps at school, and
+       report speaks goldenly of his profit: for my part,
+       he keeps me rustically at home, or, to speak more
+       properly, stays me here at home unkept; for call you
+       that keeping for a gentleman of my birth, that
+       differs not from the stalling of an ox? His horses
+       are bred better; for, besides that they are fair
+       with their feeding, they are taught their manage,
+       and to that end riders dearly hired: but I, his
+       brother, gain nothing under him but growth; for the
+       which his animals on his dunghills are as much
+       bound to him as I. Besides this nothing that he so
+       plentifully gives me, the something that nature gave
+       me his countenance seems to take from me: he lets
+       me feed with his hinds, bars me the place of a
+       brother, and, as much as in him lies, mines my
+       gentility with my education. This is it, Adam, that
+       grieves me; and the spirit of my father, which I
+       think is within me, begins to mutiny against this
+       servitude: I will no longer endure it, though yet I
+       know no wise remedy how to avoid it.
+
+ADAM   Yonder comes my master, your brother.
+
+ORLANDO        Go apart, Adam, and thou shalt hear how he will
+       shake me up.
+
+       [Enter OLIVER]
+
+OLIVER Now, sir! what make you here?
+
+ORLANDO        Nothing: I am not taught to make any thing.
+
+OLIVER What mar you then, sir?
+
+ORLANDO        Marry, sir, I am helping you to mar that which God
+       made, a poor unworthy brother of yours, with idleness.
+
+OLIVER Marry, sir, be better employed, and be naught awhile.
+
+ORLANDO        Shall I keep your hogs and eat husks with them?
+       What prodigal portion have I spent, that I should
+       come to such penury?
+
+OLIVER Know you where your are, sir?
+
+ORLANDO        O, sir, very well; here in your orchard.
+
+OLIVER Know you before whom, sir?
+
+ORLANDO        Ay, better than him I am before knows me. I know
+       you are my eldest brother; and, in the gentle
+       condition of blood, you should so know me. The
+       courtesy of nations allows you my better, in that
+       you are the first-born; but the same tradition
+       takes not away my blood, were there twenty brothers
+       betwixt us: I have as much of my father in me as
+       you; albeit, I confess, your coming before me is
+       nearer to his reverence.
+
+OLIVER What, boy!
+
+ORLANDO        Come, come, elder brother, you are too young in this.
+
+OLIVER Wilt thou lay hands on me, villain?
+
+ORLANDO        I am no villain; I am the youngest son of Sir
+       Rowland de Boys; he was my father, and he is thrice
+       a villain that says such a father begot villains.
+       Wert thou not my brother, I would not take this hand
+       from thy throat till this other had pulled out thy
+       tongue for saying so: thou hast railed on thyself.
+
+ADAM   Sweet masters, be patient: for your father's
+       remembrance, be at accord.
+
+OLIVER Let me go, I say.
+
+ORLANDO        I will not, till I please: you shall hear me. My
+       father charged you in his will to give me good
+       education: you have trained me like a peasant,
+       obscuring and hiding from me all gentleman-like
+       qualities. The spirit of my father grows strong in
+       me, and I will no longer endure it: therefore allow
+       me such exercises as may become a gentleman, or
+       give me the poor allottery my father left me by
+       testament; with that I will go buy my fortunes.
+
+OLIVER And what wilt thou do? beg, when that is spent?
+       Well, sir, get you in: I will not long be troubled
+       with you; you shall have some part of your will: I
+       pray you, leave me.
+
+ORLANDO        I will no further offend you than becomes me for my good.
+
+OLIVER Get you with him, you old dog.
+
+ADAM   Is 'old dog' my reward? Most true, I have lost my
+       teeth in your service. God be with my old master!
+       he would not have spoke such a word.
+
+       [Exeunt ORLANDO and ADAM]
+
+OLIVER Is it even so? begin you to grow upon me? I will
+       physic your rankness, and yet give no thousand
+       crowns neither. Holla, Dennis!
+
+       [Enter DENNIS]
+
+DENNIS Calls your worship?
+
+OLIVER Was not Charles, the duke's wrestler, here to speak with me?
+
+DENNIS So please you, he is here at the door and importunes
+       access to you.
+
+OLIVER Call him in.
+
+       [Exit DENNIS]
+
+       'Twill be a good way; and to-morrow the wrestling is.
+
+       [Enter CHARLES]
+
+CHARLES        Good morrow to your worship.
+
+OLIVER Good Monsieur Charles, what's the new news at the
+       new court?
+
+CHARLES        There's no news at the court, sir, but the old news:
+       that is, the old duke is banished by his younger
+       brother the new duke; and three or four loving lords
+       have put themselves into voluntary exile with him,
+       whose lands and revenues enrich the new duke;
+       therefore he gives them good leave to wander.
+
+OLIVER Can you tell if Rosalind, the duke's daughter, be
+       banished with her father?
+
+CHARLES        O, no; for the duke's daughter, her cousin, so loves
+       her, being ever from their cradles bred together,
+       that she would have followed her exile, or have died
+       to stay behind her. She is at the court, and no
+       less beloved of her uncle than his own daughter; and
+       never two ladies loved as they do.
+
+OLIVER Where will the old duke live?
+
+CHARLES        They say he is already in the forest of Arden, and
+       a many merry men with him; and there they live like
+       the old Robin Hood of England: they say many young
+       gentlemen flock to him every day, and fleet the time
+       carelessly, as they did in the golden world.
+
+OLIVER What, you wrestle to-morrow before the new duke?
+
+CHARLES        Marry, do I, sir; and I came to acquaint you with a
+       matter. I am given, sir, secretly to understand
+       that your younger brother Orlando hath a disposition
+       to come in disguised against me to try a fall.
+       To-morrow, sir, I wrestle for my credit; and he that
+       escapes me without some broken limb shall acquit him
+       well. Your brother is but young and tender; and,
+       for your love, I would be loath to foil him, as I
+       must, for my own honour, if he come in: therefore,
+       out of my love to you, I came hither to acquaint you
+       withal, that either you might stay him from his
+       intendment or brook such disgrace well as he shall
+       run into, in that it is a thing of his own search
+       and altogether against my will.
+
+OLIVER Charles, I thank thee for thy love to me, which
+       thou shalt find I will most kindly requite. I had
+       myself notice of my brother's purpose herein and
+       have by underhand means laboured to dissuade him from
+       it, but he is resolute. I'll tell thee, Charles:
+       it is the stubbornest young fellow of France, full
+       of ambition, an envious emulator of every man's
+       good parts, a secret and villanous contriver against
+       me his natural brother: therefore use thy
+       discretion; I had as lief thou didst break his neck
+       as his finger. And thou wert best look to't; for if
+       thou dost him any slight disgrace or if he do not
+       mightily grace himself on thee, he will practise
+       against thee by poison, entrap thee by some
+       treacherous device and never leave thee till he
+       hath ta'en thy life by some indirect means or other;
+       for, I assure thee, and almost with tears I speak
+       it, there is not one so young and so villanous this
+       day living. I speak but brotherly of him; but
+       should I anatomize him to thee as he is, I must
+       blush and weep and thou must look pale and wonder.
+
+CHARLES        I am heartily glad I came hither to you. If he come
+       to-morrow, I'll give him his payment: if ever he go
+       alone again, I'll never wrestle for prize more: and
+       so God keep your worship!
+
+OLIVER Farewell, good Charles.
+
+       [Exit CHARLES]
+
+       Now will I stir this gamester: I hope I shall see
+       an end of him; for my soul, yet I know not why,
+       hates nothing more than he. Yet he's gentle, never
+       schooled and yet learned, full of noble device, of
+       all sorts enchantingly beloved, and indeed so much
+       in the heart of the world, and especially of my own
+       people, who best know him, that I am altogether
+       misprised: but it shall not be so long; this
+       wrestler shall clear all: nothing remains but that
+       I kindle the boy thither; which now I'll go about.
+
+       [Exit]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT I
+
+
+
+SCENE II       Lawn before the Duke's palace.
+
+
+       [Enter CELIA and ROSALIND]
+
+CELIA  I pray thee, Rosalind, sweet my coz, be merry.
+
+ROSALIND       Dear Celia, I show more mirth than I am mistress of;
+       and would you yet I were merrier? Unless you could
+       teach me to forget a banished father, you must not
+       learn me how to remember any extraordinary pleasure.
+
+CELIA  Herein I see thou lovest me not with the full weight
+       that I love thee. If my uncle, thy banished father,
+       had banished thy uncle, the duke my father, so thou
+       hadst been still with me, I could have taught my
+       love to take thy father for mine: so wouldst thou,
+       if the truth of thy love to me were so righteously
+       tempered as mine is to thee.
+
+ROSALIND       Well, I will forget the condition of my estate, to
+       rejoice in yours.
+
+CELIA  You know my father hath no child but I, nor none is
+       like to have: and, truly, when he dies, thou shalt
+       be his heir, for what he hath taken away from thy
+       father perforce, I will render thee again in
+       affection; by mine honour, I will; and when I break
+       that oath, let me turn monster: therefore, my
+       sweet Rose, my dear Rose, be merry.
+
+ROSALIND       From henceforth I will, coz, and devise sports. Let
+       me see; what think you of falling in love?
+
+CELIA  Marry, I prithee, do, to make sport withal: but
+       love no man in good earnest; nor no further in sport
+       neither than with safety of a pure blush thou mayst
+       in honour come off again.
+
+ROSALIND       What shall be our sport, then?
+
+CELIA  Let us sit and mock the good housewife Fortune from
+       her wheel, that her gifts may henceforth be bestowed equally.
+
+ROSALIND       I would we could do so, for her benefits are
+       mightily misplaced, and the bountiful blind woman
+       doth most mistake in her gifts to women.
+
+CELIA  'Tis true; for those that she makes fair she scarce
+       makes honest, and those that she makes honest she
+       makes very ill-favouredly.
+
+ROSALIND       Nay, now thou goest from Fortune's office to
+       Nature's: Fortune reigns in gifts of the world,
+       not in the lineaments of Nature.
+
+       [Enter TOUCHSTONE]
+
+CELIA  No? when Nature hath made a fair creature, may she
+       not by Fortune fall into the fire? Though Nature
+       hath given us wit to flout at Fortune, hath not
+       Fortune sent in this fool to cut off the argument?
+
+ROSALIND       Indeed, there is Fortune too hard for Nature, when
+       Fortune makes Nature's natural the cutter-off of
+       Nature's wit.
+
+CELIA  Peradventure this is not Fortune's work neither, but
+       Nature's; who perceiveth our natural wits too dull
+       to reason of such goddesses and hath sent this
+       natural for our whetstone; for always the dulness of
+       the fool is the whetstone of the wits. How now,
+       wit! whither wander you?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Mistress, you must come away to your father.
+
+CELIA  Were you made the messenger?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     No, by mine honour, but I was bid to come for you.
+
+ROSALIND       Where learned you that oath, fool?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Of a certain knight that swore by his honour they
+       were good pancakes and swore by his honour the
+       mustard was naught: now I'll stand to it, the
+       pancakes were naught and the mustard was good, and
+       yet was not the knight forsworn.
+
+CELIA  How prove you that, in the great heap of your
+       knowledge?
+
+ROSALIND       Ay, marry, now unmuzzle your wisdom.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Stand you both forth now: stroke your chins, and
+       swear by your beards that I am a knave.
+
+CELIA  By our beards, if we had them, thou art.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     By my knavery, if I had it, then I were; but if you
+       swear by that that is not, you are not forsworn: no
+       more was this knight swearing by his honour, for he
+       never had any; or if he had, he had sworn it away
+       before ever he saw those pancakes or that mustard.
+
+CELIA  Prithee, who is't that thou meanest?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     One that old Frederick, your father, loves.
+
+CELIA  My father's love is enough to honour him: enough!
+       speak no more of him; you'll be whipped for taxation
+       one of these days.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what
+       wise men do foolishly.
+
+CELIA  By my troth, thou sayest true; for since the little
+       wit that fools have was silenced, the little foolery
+       that wise men have makes a great show. Here comes
+       Monsieur Le Beau.
+
+ROSALIND       With his mouth full of news.
+
+CELIA  Which he will put on us, as pigeons feed their young.
+
+ROSALIND       Then shall we be news-crammed.
+
+CELIA  All the better; we shall be the more marketable.
+
+       [Enter LE BEAU]
+
+       Bon jour, Monsieur Le Beau: what's the news?
+
+LE BEAU        Fair princess, you have lost much good sport.
+
+CELIA  Sport! of what colour?
+
+LE BEAU        What colour, madam! how shall I answer you?
+
+ROSALIND       As wit and fortune will.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Or as the Destinies decree.
+
+CELIA  Well said: that was laid on with a trowel.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Nay, if I keep not my rank,--
+
+ROSALIND       Thou losest thy old smell.
+
+LE BEAU        You amaze me, ladies: I would have told you of good
+       wrestling, which you have lost the sight of.
+
+ROSALIND       You tell us the manner of the wrestling.
+
+LE BEAU        I will tell you the beginning; and, if it please
+       your ladyships, you may see the end; for the best is
+       yet to do; and here, where you are, they are coming
+       to perform it.
+
+CELIA  Well, the beginning, that is dead and buried.
+
+LE BEAU        There comes an old man and his three sons,--
+
+CELIA  I could match this beginning with an old tale.
+
+LE BEAU        Three proper young men, of excellent growth and presence.
+
+ROSALIND       With bills on their necks, 'Be it known unto all men
+       by these presents.'
+
+LE BEAU        The eldest of the three wrestled with Charles, the
+       duke's wrestler; which Charles in a moment threw him
+       and broke three of his ribs, that there is little
+       hope of life in him: so he served the second, and
+       so the third. Yonder they lie; the poor old man,
+       their father, making such pitiful dole over them
+       that all the beholders take his part with weeping.
+
+ROSALIND       Alas!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     But what is the sport, monsieur, that the ladies
+       have lost?
+
+LE BEAU        Why, this that I speak of.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Thus men may grow wiser every day: it is the first
+       time that ever I heard breaking of ribs was sport
+       for ladies.
+
+CELIA  Or I, I promise thee.
+
+ROSALIND       But is there any else longs to see this broken music
+       in his sides? is there yet another dotes upon
+       rib-breaking? Shall we see this wrestling, cousin?
+
+LE BEAU        You must, if you stay here; for here is the place
+       appointed for the wrestling, and they are ready to
+       perform it.
+
+CELIA  Yonder, sure, they are coming: let us now stay and see it.
+
+       [Flourish. Enter DUKE FREDERICK, Lords, ORLANDO,
+       CHARLES, and Attendants]
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Come on: since the youth will not be entreated, his
+       own peril on his forwardness.
+
+ROSALIND       Is yonder the man?
+
+LE BEAU        Even he, madam.
+
+CELIA  Alas, he is too young! yet he looks successfully.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK How now, daughter and cousin! are you crept hither
+       to see the wrestling?
+
+ROSALIND       Ay, my liege, so please you give us leave.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK You will take little delight in it, I can tell you;
+       there is such odds in the man. In pity of the
+       challenger's youth I would fain dissuade him, but he
+       will not be entreated. Speak to him, ladies; see if
+       you can move him.
+
+CELIA  Call him hither, good Monsieur Le Beau.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Do so: I'll not be by.
+
+LE BEAU        Monsieur the challenger, the princesses call for you.
+
+ORLANDO        I attend them with all respect and duty.
+
+ROSALIND       Young man, have you challenged Charles the wrestler?
+
+ORLANDO        No, fair princess; he is the general challenger: I
+       come but in, as others do, to try with him the
+       strength of my youth.
+
+CELIA  Young gentleman, your spirits are too bold for your
+       years. You have seen cruel proof of this man's
+       strength: if you saw yourself with your eyes or
+       knew yourself with your judgment, the fear of your
+       adventure would counsel you to a more equal
+       enterprise. We pray you, for your own sake, to
+       embrace your own safety and give over this attempt.
+
+ROSALIND       Do, young sir; your reputation shall not therefore
+       be misprised: we will make it our suit to the duke
+       that the wrestling might not go forward.
+
+ORLANDO        I beseech you, punish me not with your hard
+       thoughts; wherein I confess me much guilty, to deny
+       so fair and excellent ladies any thing. But let
+       your fair eyes and gentle wishes go with me to my
+       trial: wherein if I be foiled, there is but one
+       shamed that was never gracious; if killed, but one
+       dead that was willing to be so: I shall do my
+       friends no wrong, for I have none to lament me, the
+       world no injury, for in it I have nothing; only in
+       the world I fill up a place, which may be better
+       supplied when I have made it empty.
+
+ROSALIND       The little strength that I have, I would it were with you.
+
+CELIA  And mine, to eke out hers.
+
+ROSALIND       Fare you well: pray heaven I be deceived in you!
+
+CELIA  Your heart's desires be with you!
+
+CHARLES        Come, where is this young gallant that is so
+       desirous to lie with his mother earth?
+
+ORLANDO        Ready, sir; but his will hath in it a more modest working.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK You shall try but one fall.
+
+CHARLES        No, I warrant your grace, you shall not entreat him
+       to a second, that have so mightily persuaded him
+       from a first.
+
+ORLANDO        An you mean to mock me after, you should not have
+       mocked me before: but come your ways.
+
+ROSALIND       Now Hercules be thy speed, young man!
+
+CELIA  I would I were invisible, to catch the strong
+       fellow by the leg.
+
+       [They wrestle]
+
+ROSALIND       O excellent young man!
+
+CELIA  If I had a thunderbolt in mine eye, I can tell who
+       should down.
+
+       [Shout. CHARLES is thrown]
+
+DUKE FREDERICK No more, no more.
+
+ORLANDO        Yes, I beseech your grace: I am not yet well breathed.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK How dost thou, Charles?
+
+LE BEAU        He cannot speak, my lord.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Bear him away. What is thy name, young man?
+
+ORLANDO        Orlando, my liege; the youngest son of Sir Rowland de Boys.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK I would thou hadst been son to some man else:
+       The world esteem'd thy father honourable,
+       But I did find him still mine enemy:
+       Thou shouldst have better pleased me with this deed,
+       Hadst thou descended from another house.
+       But fare thee well; thou art a gallant youth:
+       I would thou hadst told me of another father.
+
+       [Exeunt DUKE FREDERICK, train, and LE BEAU]
+
+CELIA  Were I my father, coz, would I do this?
+
+ORLANDO        I am more proud to be Sir Rowland's son,
+       His youngest son; and would not change that calling,
+       To be adopted heir to Frederick.
+
+ROSALIND       My father loved Sir Rowland as his soul,
+       And all the world was of my father's mind:
+       Had I before known this young man his son,
+       I should have given him tears unto entreaties,
+       Ere he should thus have ventured.
+
+CELIA  Gentle cousin,
+       Let us go thank him and encourage him:
+       My father's rough and envious disposition
+       Sticks me at heart. Sir, you have well deserved:
+       If you do keep your promises in love
+       But justly, as you have exceeded all promise,
+       Your mistress shall be happy.
+
+ROSALIND       Gentleman,
+
+       [Giving him a chain from her neck]
+
+       Wear this for me, one out of suits with fortune,
+       That could give more, but that her hand lacks means.
+       Shall we go, coz?
+
+CELIA                    Ay. Fare you well, fair gentleman.
+
+ORLANDO        Can I not say, I thank you? My better parts
+       Are all thrown down, and that which here stands up
+       Is but a quintain, a mere lifeless block.
+
+ROSALIND       He calls us back: my pride fell with my fortunes;
+       I'll ask him what he would. Did you call, sir?
+       Sir, you have wrestled well and overthrown
+       More than your enemies.
+
+CELIA  Will you go, coz?
+
+ROSALIND       Have with you. Fare you well.
+
+       [Exeunt ROSALIND and CELIA]
+
+ORLANDO        What passion hangs these weights upon my tongue?
+       I cannot speak to her, yet she urged conference.
+       O poor Orlando, thou art overthrown!
+       Or Charles or something weaker masters thee.
+
+       [Re-enter LE BEAU]
+
+LE BEAU        Good sir, I do in friendship counsel you
+       To leave this place. Albeit you have deserved
+       High commendation, true applause and love,
+       Yet such is now the duke's condition
+       That he misconstrues all that you have done.
+       The duke is humorous; what he is indeed,
+       More suits you to conceive than I to speak of.
+
+ORLANDO        I thank you, sir: and, pray you, tell me this:
+       Which of the two was daughter of the duke
+       That here was at the wrestling?
+
+LE BEAU        Neither his daughter, if we judge by manners;
+       But yet indeed the lesser is his daughter
+       The other is daughter to the banish'd duke,
+       And here detain'd by her usurping uncle,
+       To keep his daughter company; whose loves
+       Are dearer than the natural bond of sisters.
+       But I can tell you that of late this duke
+       Hath ta'en displeasure 'gainst his gentle niece,
+       Grounded upon no other argument
+       But that the people praise her for her virtues
+       And pity her for her good father's sake;
+       And, on my life, his malice 'gainst the lady
+       Will suddenly break forth. Sir, fare you well:
+       Hereafter, in a better world than this,
+       I shall desire more love and knowledge of you.
+
+ORLANDO        I rest much bounden to you: fare you well.
+
+       [Exit LE BEAU]
+
+       Thus must I from the smoke into the smother;
+       From tyrant duke unto a tyrant brother:
+       But heavenly Rosalind!
+
+       [Exit]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT I
+
+
+
+SCENE III      A room in the palace.
+
+
+       [Enter CELIA and ROSALIND]
+
+CELIA  Why, cousin! why, Rosalind! Cupid have mercy! not a word?
+
+ROSALIND       Not one to throw at a dog.
+
+CELIA  No, thy words are too precious to be cast away upon
+       curs; throw some of them at me; come, lame me with reasons.
+
+ROSALIND       Then there were two cousins laid up; when the one
+       should be lamed with reasons and the other mad
+       without any.
+
+CELIA  But is all this for your father?
+
+ROSALIND       No, some of it is for my child's father. O, how
+       full of briers is this working-day world!
+
+CELIA  They are but burs, cousin, thrown upon thee in
+       holiday foolery: if we walk not in the trodden
+       paths our very petticoats will catch them.
+
+ROSALIND       I could shake them off my coat: these burs are in my heart.
+
+CELIA  Hem them away.
+
+ROSALIND       I would try, if I could cry 'hem' and have him.
+
+CELIA  Come, come, wrestle with thy affections.
+
+ROSALIND       O, they take the part of a better wrestler than myself!
+
+CELIA  O, a good wish upon you! you will try in time, in
+       despite of a fall. But, turning these jests out of
+       service, let us talk in good earnest: is it
+       possible, on such a sudden, you should fall into so
+       strong a liking with old Sir Rowland's youngest son?
+
+ROSALIND       The duke my father loved his father dearly.
+
+CELIA  Doth it therefore ensue that you should love his son
+       dearly? By this kind of chase, I should hate him,
+       for my father hated his father dearly; yet I hate
+       not Orlando.
+
+ROSALIND       No, faith, hate him not, for my sake.
+
+CELIA  Why should I not? doth he not deserve well?
+
+ROSALIND       Let me love him for that, and do you love him
+       because I do. Look, here comes the duke.
+
+CELIA  With his eyes full of anger.
+
+       [Enter DUKE FREDERICK, with Lords]
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Mistress, dispatch you with your safest haste
+       And get you from our court.
+
+ROSALIND       Me, uncle?
+
+DUKE FREDERICK You, cousin
+       Within these ten days if that thou be'st found
+       So near our public court as twenty miles,
+       Thou diest for it.
+
+ROSALIND                         I do beseech your grace,
+       Let me the knowledge of my fault bear with me:
+       If with myself I hold intelligence
+       Or have acquaintance with mine own desires,
+       If that I do not dream or be not frantic,--
+       As I do trust I am not--then, dear uncle,
+       Never so much as in a thought unborn
+       Did I offend your highness.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Thus do all traitors:
+       If their purgation did consist in words,
+       They are as innocent as grace itself:
+       Let it suffice thee that I trust thee not.
+
+ROSALIND       Yet your mistrust cannot make me a traitor:
+       Tell me whereon the likelihood depends.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Thou art thy father's daughter; there's enough.
+
+ROSALIND       So was I when your highness took his dukedom;
+       So was I when your highness banish'd him:
+       Treason is not inherited, my lord;
+       Or, if we did derive it from our friends,
+       What's that to me? my father was no traitor:
+       Then, good my liege, mistake me not so much
+       To think my poverty is treacherous.
+
+CELIA  Dear sovereign, hear me speak.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Ay, Celia; we stay'd her for your sake,
+       Else had she with her father ranged along.
+
+CELIA  I did not then entreat to have her stay;
+       It was your pleasure and your own remorse:
+       I was too young that time to value her;
+       But now I know her: if she be a traitor,
+       Why so am I; we still have slept together,
+       Rose at an instant, learn'd, play'd, eat together,
+       And wheresoever we went, like Juno's swans,
+       Still we went coupled and inseparable.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK She is too subtle for thee; and her smoothness,
+       Her very silence and her patience
+       Speak to the people, and they pity her.
+       Thou art a fool: she robs thee of thy name;
+       And thou wilt show more bright and seem more virtuous
+       When she is gone. Then open not thy lips:
+       Firm and irrevocable is my doom
+       Which I have pass'd upon her; she is banish'd.
+
+CELIA  Pronounce that sentence then on me, my liege:
+       I cannot live out of her company.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK You are a fool. You, niece, provide yourself:
+       If you outstay the time, upon mine honour,
+       And in the greatness of my word, you die.
+
+       [Exeunt DUKE FREDERICK and Lords]
+
+CELIA  O my poor Rosalind, whither wilt thou go?
+       Wilt thou change fathers? I will give thee mine.
+       I charge thee, be not thou more grieved than I am.
+
+ROSALIND       I have more cause.
+
+CELIA                    Thou hast not, cousin;
+       Prithee be cheerful: know'st thou not, the duke
+       Hath banish'd me, his daughter?
+
+ROSALIND       That he hath not.
+
+CELIA  No, hath not? Rosalind lacks then the love
+       Which teacheth thee that thou and I am one:
+       Shall we be sunder'd? shall we part, sweet girl?
+       No: let my father seek another heir.
+       Therefore devise with me how we may fly,
+       Whither to go and what to bear with us;
+       And do not seek to take your change upon you,
+       To bear your griefs yourself and leave me out;
+       For, by this heaven, now at our sorrows pale,
+       Say what thou canst, I'll go along with thee.
+
+ROSALIND       Why, whither shall we go?
+
+CELIA  To seek my uncle in the forest of Arden.
+
+ROSALIND       Alas, what danger will it be to us,
+       Maids as we are, to travel forth so far!
+       Beauty provoketh thieves sooner than gold.
+
+CELIA  I'll put myself in poor and mean attire
+       And with a kind of umber smirch my face;
+       The like do you: so shall we pass along
+       And never stir assailants.
+
+ROSALIND       Were it not better,
+       Because that I am more than common tall,
+       That I did suit me all points like a man?
+       A gallant curtle-axe upon my thigh,
+       A boar-spear in my hand; and--in my heart
+       Lie there what hidden woman's fear there will--
+       We'll have a swashing and a martial outside,
+       As many other mannish cowards have
+       That do outface it with their semblances.
+
+CELIA  What shall I call thee when thou art a man?
+
+ROSALIND       I'll have no worse a name than Jove's own page;
+       And therefore look you call me Ganymede.
+       But what will you be call'd?
+
+CELIA  Something that hath a reference to my state
+       No longer Celia, but Aliena.
+
+ROSALIND       But, cousin, what if we assay'd to steal
+       The clownish fool out of your father's court?
+       Would he not be a comfort to our travel?
+
+CELIA  He'll go along o'er the wide world with me;
+       Leave me alone to woo him. Let's away,
+       And get our jewels and our wealth together,
+       Devise the fittest time and safest way
+       To hide us from pursuit that will be made
+       After my flight. Now go we in content
+       To liberty and not to banishment.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE I        The Forest of Arden.
+
+
+       [Enter DUKE SENIOR, AMIENS, and two or three Lords,
+       like foresters]
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Now, my co-mates and brothers in exile,
+       Hath not old custom made this life more sweet
+       Than that of painted pomp? Are not these woods
+       More free from peril than the envious court?
+       Here feel we but the penalty of Adam,
+       The seasons' difference, as the icy fang
+       And churlish chiding of the winter's wind,
+       Which, when it bites and blows upon my body,
+       Even till I shrink with cold, I smile and say
+       'This is no flattery: these are counsellors
+       That feelingly persuade me what I am.'
+       Sweet are the uses of adversity,
+       Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,
+       Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;
+       And this our life exempt from public haunt
+       Finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,
+       Sermons in stones and good in every thing.
+       I would not change it.
+
+AMIENS Happy is your grace,
+       That can translate the stubbornness of fortune
+       Into so quiet and so sweet a style.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Come, shall we go and kill us venison?
+       And yet it irks me the poor dappled fools,
+       Being native burghers of this desert city,
+       Should in their own confines with forked heads
+       Have their round haunches gored.
+
+First Lord     Indeed, my lord,
+       The melancholy Jaques grieves at that,
+       And, in that kind, swears you do more usurp
+       Than doth your brother that hath banish'd you.
+       To-day my Lord of Amiens and myself
+       Did steal behind him as he lay along
+       Under an oak whose antique root peeps out
+       Upon the brook that brawls along this wood:
+       To the which place a poor sequester'd stag,
+       That from the hunter's aim had ta'en a hurt,
+       Did come to languish, and indeed, my lord,
+       The wretched animal heaved forth such groans
+       That their discharge did stretch his leathern coat
+       Almost to bursting, and the big round tears
+       Coursed one another down his innocent nose
+       In piteous chase; and thus the hairy fool
+       Much marked of the melancholy Jaques,
+       Stood on the extremest verge of the swift brook,
+       Augmenting it with tears.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    But what said Jaques?
+       Did he not moralize this spectacle?
+
+First Lord     O, yes, into a thousand similes.
+       First, for his weeping into the needless stream;
+       'Poor deer,' quoth he, 'thou makest a testament
+       As worldlings do, giving thy sum of more
+       To that which had too much:' then, being there alone,
+       Left and abandon'd of his velvet friends,
+       ''Tis right:' quoth he; 'thus misery doth part
+       The flux of company:' anon a careless herd,
+       Full of the pasture, jumps along by him
+       And never stays to greet him; 'Ay' quoth Jaques,
+       'Sweep on, you fat and greasy citizens;
+       'Tis just the fashion: wherefore do you look
+       Upon that poor and broken bankrupt there?'
+       Thus most invectively he pierceth through
+       The body of the country, city, court,
+       Yea, and of this our life, swearing that we
+       Are mere usurpers, tyrants and what's worse,
+       To fright the animals and to kill them up
+       In their assign'd and native dwelling-place.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    And did you leave him in this contemplation?
+
+Second Lord    We did, my lord, weeping and commenting
+       Upon the sobbing deer.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Show me the place:
+       I love to cope him in these sullen fits,
+       For then he's full of matter.
+
+First Lord     I'll bring you to him straight.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE II       A room in the palace.
+
+
+       [Enter DUKE FREDERICK, with Lords]
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Can it be possible that no man saw them?
+       It cannot be: some villains of my court
+       Are of consent and sufferance in this.
+
+First Lord     I cannot hear of any that did see her.
+       The ladies, her attendants of her chamber,
+       Saw her abed, and in the morning early
+       They found the bed untreasured of their mistress.
+
+Second Lord    My lord, the roynish clown, at whom so oft
+       Your grace was wont to laugh, is also missing.
+       Hisperia, the princess' gentlewoman,
+       Confesses that she secretly o'erheard
+       Your daughter and her cousin much commend
+       The parts and graces of the wrestler
+       That did but lately foil the sinewy Charles;
+       And she believes, wherever they are gone,
+       That youth is surely in their company.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Send to his brother; fetch that gallant hither;
+       If he be absent, bring his brother to me;
+       I'll make him find him: do this suddenly,
+       And let not search and inquisition quail
+       To bring again these foolish runaways.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE III      Before OLIVER'S house.
+
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO and ADAM, meeting]
+
+ORLANDO        Who's there?
+
+ADAM   What, my young master? O, my gentle master!
+       O my sweet master! O you memory
+       Of old Sir Rowland! why, what make you here?
+       Why are you virtuous? why do people love you?
+       And wherefore are you gentle, strong and valiant?
+       Why would you be so fond to overcome
+       The bonny priser of the humorous duke?
+       Your praise is come too swiftly home before you.
+       Know you not, master, to some kind of men
+       Their graces serve them but as enemies?
+       No more do yours: your virtues, gentle master,
+       Are sanctified and holy traitors to you.
+       O, what a world is this, when what is comely
+       Envenoms him that bears it!
+
+ORLANDO        Why, what's the matter?
+
+ADAM   O unhappy youth!
+       Come not within these doors; within this roof
+       The enemy of all your graces lives:
+       Your brother--no, no brother; yet the son--
+       Yet not the son, I will not call him son
+       Of him I was about to call his father--
+       Hath heard your praises, and this night he means
+       To burn the lodging where you use to lie
+       And you within it: if he fail of that,
+       He will have other means to cut you off.
+       I overheard him and his practises.
+       This is no place; this house is but a butchery:
+       Abhor it, fear it, do not enter it.
+
+ORLANDO        Why, whither, Adam, wouldst thou have me go?
+
+ADAM   No matter whither, so you come not here.
+
+ORLANDO        What, wouldst thou have me go and beg my food?
+       Or with a base and boisterous sword enforce
+       A thievish living on the common road?
+       This I must do, or know not what to do:
+       Yet this I will not do, do how I can;
+       I rather will subject me to the malice
+       Of a diverted blood and bloody brother.
+
+ADAM   But do not so. I have five hundred crowns,
+       The thrifty hire I saved under your father,
+       Which I did store to be my foster-nurse
+       When service should in my old limbs lie lame
+       And unregarded age in corners thrown:
+       Take that, and He that doth the ravens feed,
+       Yea, providently caters for the sparrow,
+       Be comfort to my age! Here is the gold;
+       And all this I give you. Let me be your servant:
+       Though I look old, yet I am strong and lusty;
+       For in my youth I never did apply
+       Hot and rebellious liquors in my blood,
+       Nor did not with unbashful forehead woo
+       The means of weakness and debility;
+       Therefore my age is as a lusty winter,
+       Frosty, but kindly: let me go with you;
+       I'll do the service of a younger man
+       In all your business and necessities.
+
+ORLANDO        O good old man, how well in thee appears
+       The constant service of the antique world,
+       When service sweat for duty, not for meed!
+       Thou art not for the fashion of these times,
+       Where none will sweat but for promotion,
+       And having that, do choke their service up
+       Even with the having: it is not so with thee.
+       But, poor old man, thou prunest a rotten tree,
+       That cannot so much as a blossom yield
+       In lieu of all thy pains and husbandry
+       But come thy ways; well go along together,
+       And ere we have thy youthful wages spent,
+       We'll light upon some settled low content.
+
+ADAM   Master, go on, and I will follow thee,
+       To the last gasp, with truth and loyalty.
+       From seventeen years till now almost fourscore
+       Here lived I, but now live here no more.
+       At seventeen years many their fortunes seek;
+       But at fourscore it is too late a week:
+       Yet fortune cannot recompense me better
+       Than to die well and not my master's debtor.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE IV       The Forest of Arden.
+
+
+       [Enter ROSALIND for Ganymede, CELIA for Aliena,
+       and TOUCHSTONE]
+
+ROSALIND       O Jupiter, how weary are my spirits!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     I care not for my spirits, if my legs were not weary.
+
+ROSALIND       I could find in my heart to disgrace my man's
+       apparel and to cry like a woman; but I must comfort
+       the weaker vessel, as doublet and hose ought to show
+       itself courageous to petticoat: therefore courage,
+       good Aliena!
+
+CELIA  I pray you, bear with me; I cannot go no further.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     For my part, I had rather bear with you than bear
+       you; yet I should bear no cross if I did bear you,
+       for I think you have no money in your purse.
+
+ROSALIND       Well, this is the forest of Arden.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Ay, now am I in Arden; the more fool I; when I was
+       at home, I was in a better place: but travellers
+       must be content.
+
+ROSALIND       Ay, be so, good Touchstone.
+
+       [Enter CORIN and SILVIUS]
+
+       Look you, who comes here; a young man and an old in
+       solemn talk.
+
+CORIN  That is the way to make her scorn you still.
+
+SILVIUS        O Corin, that thou knew'st how I do love her!
+
+CORIN  I partly guess; for I have loved ere now.
+
+SILVIUS        No, Corin, being old, thou canst not guess,
+       Though in thy youth thou wast as true a lover
+       As ever sigh'd upon a midnight pillow:
+       But if thy love were ever like to mine--
+       As sure I think did never man love so--
+       How many actions most ridiculous
+       Hast thou been drawn to by thy fantasy?
+
+CORIN  Into a thousand that I have forgotten.
+
+SILVIUS        O, thou didst then ne'er love so heartily!
+       If thou remember'st not the slightest folly
+       That ever love did make thee run into,
+       Thou hast not loved:
+       Or if thou hast not sat as I do now,
+       Wearying thy hearer in thy mistress' praise,
+       Thou hast not loved:
+       Or if thou hast not broke from company
+       Abruptly, as my passion now makes me,
+       Thou hast not loved.
+       O Phebe, Phebe, Phebe!
+
+       [Exit]
+
+ROSALIND       Alas, poor shepherd! searching of thy wound,
+       I have by hard adventure found mine own.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     And I mine. I remember, when I was in love I broke
+       my sword upon a stone and bid him take that for
+       coming a-night to Jane Smile; and I remember the
+       kissing of her batlet and the cow's dugs that her
+       pretty chopt hands had milked; and I remember the
+       wooing of a peascod instead of her, from whom I took
+       two cods and, giving her them again, said with
+       weeping tears 'Wear these for my sake.' We that are
+       true lovers run into strange capers; but as all is
+       mortal in nature, so is all nature in love mortal in folly.
+
+ROSALIND       Thou speakest wiser than thou art ware of.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Nay, I shall ne'er be ware of mine own wit till I
+       break my shins against it.
+
+ROSALIND       Jove, Jove! this shepherd's passion
+       Is much upon my fashion.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     And mine; but it grows something stale with me.
+
+CELIA  I pray you, one of you question yond man
+       If he for gold will give us any food:
+       I faint almost to death.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Holla, you clown!
+
+ROSALIND       Peace, fool: he's not thy kinsman.
+
+CORIN  Who calls?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Your betters, sir.
+
+CORIN                    Else are they very wretched.
+
+ROSALIND       Peace, I say. Good even to you, friend.
+
+CORIN  And to you, gentle sir, and to you all.
+
+ROSALIND       I prithee, shepherd, if that love or gold
+       Can in this desert place buy entertainment,
+       Bring us where we may rest ourselves and feed:
+       Here's a young maid with travel much oppress'd
+       And faints for succor.
+
+CORIN  Fair sir, I pity her
+       And wish, for her sake more than for mine own,
+       My fortunes were more able to relieve her;
+       But I am shepherd to another man
+       And do not shear the fleeces that I graze:
+       My master is of churlish disposition
+       And little recks to find the way to heaven
+       By doing deeds of hospitality:
+       Besides, his cote, his flocks and bounds of feed
+       Are now on sale, and at our sheepcote now,
+       By reason of his absence, there is nothing
+       That you will feed on; but what is, come see.
+       And in my voice most welcome shall you be.
+
+ROSALIND       What is he that shall buy his flock and pasture?
+
+CORIN  That young swain that you saw here but erewhile,
+       That little cares for buying any thing.
+
+ROSALIND       I pray thee, if it stand with honesty,
+       Buy thou the cottage, pasture and the flock,
+       And thou shalt have to pay for it of us.
+
+CELIA  And we will mend thy wages. I like this place.
+       And willingly could waste my time in it.
+
+CORIN  Assuredly the thing is to be sold:
+       Go with me: if you like upon report
+       The soil, the profit and this kind of life,
+       I will your very faithful feeder be
+       And buy it with your gold right suddenly.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE V        The Forest.
+
+
+       [Enter AMIENS, JAQUES, and others]
+       
+       SONG.
+AMIENS Under the greenwood tree
+       Who loves to lie with me,
+       And turn his merry note
+       Unto the sweet bird's throat,
+       Come hither, come hither, come hither:
+       Here shall he see No enemy
+       But winter and rough weather.
+
+JAQUES More, more, I prithee, more.
+
+AMIENS It will make you melancholy, Monsieur Jaques.
+
+JAQUES I thank it. More, I prithee, more. I can suck
+       melancholy out of a song, as a weasel sucks eggs.
+       More, I prithee, more.
+
+AMIENS My voice is ragged: I know I cannot please you.
+
+JAQUES I do not desire you to please me; I do desire you to
+       sing. Come, more; another stanzo: call you 'em stanzos?
+
+AMIENS What you will, Monsieur Jaques.
+
+JAQUES Nay, I care not for their names; they owe me
+       nothing. Will you sing?
+
+AMIENS More at your request than to please myself.
+
+JAQUES Well then, if ever I thank any man, I'll thank you;
+       but that they call compliment is like the encounter
+       of two dog-apes, and when a man thanks me heartily,
+       methinks I have given him a penny and he renders me
+       the beggarly thanks. Come, sing; and you that will
+       not, hold your tongues.
+
+AMIENS Well, I'll end the song. Sirs, cover the while; the
+       duke will drink under this tree. He hath been all
+       this day to look you.
+
+JAQUES And I have been all this day to avoid him. He is
+       too disputable for my company: I think of as many
+       matters as he, but I give heaven thanks and make no
+       boast of them. Come, warble, come.
+       
+       SONG.
+       Who doth ambition shun
+
+       [All together here]
+
+       And loves to live i' the sun,
+       Seeking the food he eats
+       And pleased with what he gets,
+       Come hither, come hither, come hither:
+       Here shall he see No enemy
+       But winter and rough weather.
+
+JAQUES I'll give you a verse to this note that I made
+       yesterday in despite of my invention.
+
+AMIENS And I'll sing it.
+
+JAQUES Thus it goes:--
+
+       If it do come to pass
+       That any man turn ass,
+       Leaving his wealth and ease,
+       A stubborn will to please,
+       Ducdame, ducdame, ducdame:
+       Here shall he see
+       Gross fools as he,
+       An if he will come to me.
+
+AMIENS What's that 'ducdame'?
+
+JAQUES 'Tis a Greek invocation, to call fools into a
+       circle. I'll go sleep, if I can; if I cannot, I'll
+       rail against all the first-born of Egypt.
+
+AMIENS And I'll go seek the duke: his banquet is prepared.
+
+       [Exeunt severally]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE VI       The forest.
+
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO and ADAM]
+
+ADAM   Dear master, I can go no further. O, I die for food!
+       Here lie I down, and measure out my grave. Farewell,
+       kind master.
+
+ORLANDO        Why, how now, Adam! no greater heart in thee? Live
+       a little; comfort a little; cheer thyself a little.
+       If this uncouth forest yield any thing savage, I
+       will either be food for it or bring it for food to
+       thee. Thy conceit is nearer death than thy powers.
+       For my sake be comfortable; hold death awhile at
+       the arm's end: I will here be with thee presently;
+       and if I bring thee not something to eat, I will
+       give thee leave to die: but if thou diest before I
+       come, thou art a mocker of my labour. Well said!
+       thou lookest cheerly, and I'll be with thee quickly.
+       Yet thou liest in the bleak air: come, I will bear
+       thee to some shelter; and thou shalt not die for
+       lack of a dinner, if there live any thing in this
+       desert. Cheerly, good Adam!
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT II
+
+
+
+SCENE VII      The forest.
+
+
+       [A table set out. Enter DUKE SENIOR, AMIENS, and
+       Lords like outlaws]
+
+DUKE SENIOR    I think he be transform'd into a beast;
+       For I can no where find him like a man.
+
+First Lord     My lord, he is but even now gone hence:
+       Here was he merry, hearing of a song.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    If he, compact of jars, grow musical,
+       We shall have shortly discord in the spheres.
+       Go, seek him: tell him I would speak with him.
+
+       [Enter JAQUES]
+
+First Lord     He saves my labour by his own approach.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Why, how now, monsieur! what a life is this,
+       That your poor friends must woo your company?
+       What, you look merrily!
+
+JAQUES A fool, a fool! I met a fool i' the forest,
+       A motley fool; a miserable world!
+       As I do live by food, I met a fool
+       Who laid him down and bask'd him in the sun,
+       And rail'd on Lady Fortune in good terms,
+       In good set terms and yet a motley fool.
+       'Good morrow, fool,' quoth I. 'No, sir,' quoth he,
+       'Call me not fool till heaven hath sent me fortune:'
+       And then he drew a dial from his poke,
+       And, looking on it with lack-lustre eye,
+       Says very wisely, 'It is ten o'clock:
+       Thus we may see,' quoth he, 'how the world wags:
+       'Tis but an hour ago since it was nine,
+       And after one hour more 'twill be eleven;
+       And so, from hour to hour, we ripe and ripe,
+       And then, from hour to hour, we rot and rot;
+       And thereby hangs a tale.' When I did hear
+       The motley fool thus moral on the time,
+       My lungs began to crow like chanticleer,
+       That fools should be so deep-contemplative,
+       And I did laugh sans intermission
+       An hour by his dial. O noble fool!
+       A worthy fool! Motley's the only wear.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    What fool is this?
+
+JAQUES O worthy fool! One that hath been a courtier,
+       And says, if ladies be but young and fair,
+       They have the gift to know it: and in his brain,
+       Which is as dry as the remainder biscuit
+       After a voyage, he hath strange places cramm'd
+       With observation, the which he vents
+       In mangled forms. O that I were a fool!
+       I am ambitious for a motley coat.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Thou shalt have one.
+
+JAQUES It is my only suit;
+       Provided that you weed your better judgments
+       Of all opinion that grows rank in them
+       That I am wise. I must have liberty
+       Withal, as large a charter as the wind,
+       To blow on whom I please; for so fools have;
+       And they that are most galled with my folly,
+       They most must laugh. And why, sir, must they so?
+       The 'why' is plain as way to parish church:
+       He that a fool doth very wisely hit
+       Doth very foolishly, although he smart,
+       Not to seem senseless of the bob: if not,
+       The wise man's folly is anatomized
+       Even by the squandering glances of the fool.
+       Invest me in my motley; give me leave
+       To speak my mind, and I will through and through
+       Cleanse the foul body of the infected world,
+       If they will patiently receive my medicine.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Fie on thee! I can tell what thou wouldst do.
+
+JAQUES What, for a counter, would I do but good?
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Most mischievous foul sin, in chiding sin:
+       For thou thyself hast been a libertine,
+       As sensual as the brutish sting itself;
+       And all the embossed sores and headed evils,
+       That thou with licence of free foot hast caught,
+       Wouldst thou disgorge into the general world.
+
+JAQUES Why, who cries out on pride,
+       That can therein tax any private party?
+       Doth it not flow as hugely as the sea,
+       Till that the weary very means do ebb?
+       What woman in the city do I name,
+       When that I say the city-woman bears
+       The cost of princes on unworthy shoulders?
+       Who can come in and say that I mean her,
+       When such a one as she such is her neighbour?
+       Or what is he of basest function
+       That says his bravery is not of my cost,
+       Thinking that I mean him, but therein suits
+       His folly to the mettle of my speech?
+       There then; how then? what then? Let me see wherein
+       My tongue hath wrong'd him: if it do him right,
+       Then he hath wrong'd himself; if he be free,
+       Why then my taxing like a wild-goose flies,
+       Unclaim'd of any man. But who comes here?
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO, with his sword drawn]
+
+ORLANDO        Forbear, and eat no more.
+
+JAQUES Why, I have eat none yet.
+
+ORLANDO        Nor shalt not, till necessity be served.
+
+JAQUES Of what kind should this cock come of?
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Art thou thus bolden'd, man, by thy distress,
+       Or else a rude despiser of good manners,
+       That in civility thou seem'st so empty?
+
+ORLANDO        You touch'd my vein at first: the thorny point
+       Of bare distress hath ta'en from me the show
+       Of smooth civility: yet am I inland bred
+       And know some nurture. But forbear, I say:
+       He dies that touches any of this fruit
+       Till I and my affairs are answered.
+
+JAQUES An you will not be answered with reason, I must die.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    What would you have? Your gentleness shall force
+       More than your force move us to gentleness.
+
+ORLANDO        I almost die for food; and let me have it.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Sit down and feed, and welcome to our table.
+
+ORLANDO        Speak you so gently? Pardon me, I pray you:
+       I thought that all things had been savage here;
+       And therefore put I on the countenance
+       Of stern commandment. But whate'er you are
+       That in this desert inaccessible,
+       Under the shade of melancholy boughs,
+       Lose and neglect the creeping hours of time
+       If ever you have look'd on better days,
+       If ever been where bells have knoll'd to church,
+       If ever sat at any good man's feast,
+       If ever from your eyelids wiped a tear
+       And know what 'tis to pity and be pitied,
+       Let gentleness my strong enforcement be:
+       In the which hope I blush, and hide my sword.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    True is it that we have seen better days,
+       And have with holy bell been knoll'd to church
+       And sat at good men's feasts and wiped our eyes
+       Of drops that sacred pity hath engender'd:
+       And therefore sit you down in gentleness
+       And take upon command what help we have
+       That to your wanting may be minister'd.
+
+ORLANDO        Then but forbear your food a little while,
+       Whiles, like a doe, I go to find my fawn
+       And give it food. There is an old poor man,
+       Who after me hath many a weary step
+       Limp'd in pure love: till he be first sufficed,
+       Oppress'd with two weak evils, age and hunger,
+       I will not touch a bit.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Go find him out,
+       And we will nothing waste till you return.
+
+ORLANDO        I thank ye; and be blest for your good comfort!
+
+       [Exit]
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Thou seest we are not all alone unhappy:
+       This wide and universal theatre
+       Presents more woeful pageants than the scene
+       Wherein we play in.
+
+JAQUES All the world's a stage,
+       And all the men and women merely players:
+       They have their exits and their entrances;
+       And one man in his time plays many parts,
+       His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
+       Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms.
+       And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
+       And shining morning face, creeping like snail
+       Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
+       Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
+       Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
+       Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,
+       Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
+       Seeking the bubble reputation
+       Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
+       In fair round belly with good capon lined,
+       With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
+       Full of wise saws and modern instances;
+       And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
+       Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
+       With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
+       His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
+       For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
+       Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
+       And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
+       That ends this strange eventful history,
+       Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
+       Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.
+
+       [Re-enter ORLANDO, with ADAM]
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Welcome. Set down your venerable burthen,
+       And let him feed.
+
+ORLANDO        I thank you most for him.
+
+ADAM   So had you need:
+       I scarce can speak to thank you for myself.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    Welcome; fall to: I will not trouble you
+       As yet, to question you about your fortunes.
+       Give us some music; and, good cousin, sing.
+       
+       SONG.
+AMIENS Blow, blow, thou winter wind.
+       Thou art not so unkind
+       As man's ingratitude;
+       Thy tooth is not so keen,
+       Because thou art not seen,
+       Although thy breath be rude.
+       Heigh-ho! sing, heigh-ho! unto the green holly:
+       Most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
+       Then, heigh-ho, the holly!
+       This life is most jolly.
+       Freeze, freeze, thou bitter sky,
+       That dost not bite so nigh
+       As benefits forgot:
+       Though thou the waters warp,
+       Thy sting is not so sharp
+       As friend remember'd not.
+       Heigh-ho! sing, &c.
+
+DUKE SENIOR    If that you were the good Sir Rowland's son,
+       As you have whisper'd faithfully you were,
+       And as mine eye doth his effigies witness
+       Most truly limn'd and living in your face,
+       Be truly welcome hither: I am the duke
+       That loved your father: the residue of your fortune,
+       Go to my cave and tell me. Good old man,
+       Thou art right welcome as thy master is.
+       Support him by the arm. Give me your hand,
+       And let me all your fortunes understand.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT III
+
+
+
+SCENE I        A room in the palace.
+
+
+       [Enter DUKE FREDERICK, Lords, and OLIVER]
+
+DUKE FREDERICK Not see him since? Sir, sir, that cannot be:
+       But were I not the better part made mercy,
+       I should not seek an absent argument
+       Of my revenge, thou present. But look to it:
+       Find out thy brother, wheresoe'er he is;
+       Seek him with candle; bring him dead or living
+       Within this twelvemonth, or turn thou no more
+       To seek a living in our territory.
+       Thy lands and all things that thou dost call thine
+       Worth seizure do we seize into our hands,
+       Till thou canst quit thee by thy brothers mouth
+       Of what we think against thee.
+
+OLIVER O that your highness knew my heart in this!
+       I never loved my brother in my life.
+
+DUKE FREDERICK More villain thou. Well, push him out of doors;
+       And let my officers of such a nature
+       Make an extent upon his house and lands:
+       Do this expediently and turn him going.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT III
+
+
+
+SCENE II       The forest.
+
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO, with a paper]
+
+ORLANDO        Hang there, my verse, in witness of my love:
+       And thou, thrice-crowned queen of night, survey
+       With thy chaste eye, from thy pale sphere above,
+       Thy huntress' name that my full life doth sway.
+       O Rosalind! these trees shall be my books
+       And in their barks my thoughts I'll character;
+       That every eye which in this forest looks
+       Shall see thy virtue witness'd every where.
+       Run, run, Orlando; carve on every tree
+       The fair, the chaste and unexpressive she.
+
+       [Exit]
+
+       [Enter CORIN and TOUCHSTONE]
+
+CORIN  And how like you this shepherd's life, Master Touchstone?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Truly, shepherd, in respect of itself, it is a good
+       life, but in respect that it is a shepherd's life,
+       it is naught. In respect that it is solitary, I
+       like it very well; but in respect that it is
+       private, it is a very vile life. Now, in respect it
+       is in the fields, it pleaseth me well; but in
+       respect it is not in the court, it is tedious. As
+       is it a spare life, look you, it fits my humour well;
+       but as there is no more plenty in it, it goes much
+       against my stomach. Hast any philosophy in thee, shepherd?
+
+CORIN  No more but that I know the more one sickens the
+       worse at ease he is; and that he that wants money,
+       means and content is without three good friends;
+       that the property of rain is to wet and fire to
+       burn; that good pasture makes fat sheep, and that a
+       great cause of the night is lack of the sun; that
+       he that hath learned no wit by nature nor art may
+       complain of good breeding or comes of a very dull kindred.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Such a one is a natural philosopher. Wast ever in
+       court, shepherd?
+
+CORIN  No, truly.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Then thou art damned.
+
+CORIN  Nay, I hope.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Truly, thou art damned like an ill-roasted egg, all
+       on one side.
+
+CORIN  For not being at court? Your reason.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Why, if thou never wast at court, thou never sawest
+       good manners; if thou never sawest good manners,
+       then thy manners must be wicked; and wickedness is
+       sin, and sin is damnation. Thou art in a parlous
+       state, shepherd.
+
+CORIN  Not a whit, Touchstone: those that are good manners
+       at the court are as ridiculous in the country as the
+       behavior of the country is most mockable at the
+       court. You told me you salute not at the court, but
+       you kiss your hands: that courtesy would be
+       uncleanly, if courtiers were shepherds.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Instance, briefly; come, instance.
+
+CORIN  Why, we are still handling our ewes, and their
+       fells, you know, are greasy.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Why, do not your courtier's hands sweat? and is not
+       the grease of a mutton as wholesome as the sweat of
+       a man? Shallow, shallow. A better instance, I say; come.
+
+CORIN  Besides, our hands are hard.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Your lips will feel them the sooner. Shallow again.
+       A more sounder instance, come.
+
+CORIN  And they are often tarred over with the surgery of
+       our sheep: and would you have us kiss tar? The
+       courtier's hands are perfumed with civet.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Most shallow man! thou worms-meat, in respect of a
+       good piece of flesh indeed! Learn of the wise, and
+       perpend: civet is of a baser birth than tar, the
+       very uncleanly flux of a cat. Mend the instance, shepherd.
+
+CORIN  You have too courtly a wit for me: I'll rest.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Wilt thou rest damned? God help thee, shallow man!
+       God make incision in thee! thou art raw.
+
+CORIN  Sir, I am a true labourer: I earn that I eat, get
+       that I wear, owe no man hate, envy no man's
+       happiness, glad of other men's good, content with my
+       harm, and the greatest of my pride is to see my ewes
+       graze and my lambs suck.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     That is another simple sin in you, to bring the ewes
+       and the rams together and to offer to get your
+       living by the copulation of cattle; to be bawd to a
+       bell-wether, and to betray a she-lamb of a
+       twelvemonth to a crooked-pated, old, cuckoldly ram,
+       out of all reasonable match. If thou beest not
+       damned for this, the devil himself will have no
+       shepherds; I cannot see else how thou shouldst
+       'scape.
+
+CORIN  Here comes young Master Ganymede, my new mistress's brother.
+
+       [Enter ROSALIND, with a paper, reading]
+
+ROSALIND            From the east to western Ind,
+       No jewel is like Rosalind.
+       Her worth, being mounted on the wind,
+       Through all the world bears Rosalind.
+       All the pictures fairest lined
+       Are but black to Rosalind.
+       Let no fair be kept in mind
+       But the fair of Rosalind.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     I'll rhyme you so eight years together, dinners and
+       suppers and sleeping-hours excepted: it is the
+       right butter-women's rank to market.
+
+ROSALIND       Out, fool!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     For a taste:
+       If a hart do lack a hind,
+       Let him seek out Rosalind.
+       If the cat will after kind,
+       So be sure will Rosalind.
+       Winter garments must be lined,
+       So must slender Rosalind.
+       They that reap must sheaf and bind;
+       Then to cart with Rosalind.
+       Sweetest nut hath sourest rind,
+       Such a nut is Rosalind.
+       He that sweetest rose will find
+       Must find love's prick and Rosalind.
+       This is the very false gallop of verses: why do you
+       infect yourself with them?
+
+ROSALIND       Peace, you dull fool! I found them on a tree.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Truly, the tree yields bad fruit.
+
+ROSALIND       I'll graff it with you, and then I shall graff it
+       with a medlar: then it will be the earliest fruit
+       i' the country; for you'll be rotten ere you be half
+       ripe, and that's the right virtue of the medlar.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     You have said; but whether wisely or no, let the
+       forest judge.
+
+       [Enter CELIA, with a writing]
+
+ROSALIND       Peace! Here comes my sister, reading: stand aside.
+
+CELIA  [Reads]
+
+       Why should this a desert be?
+       For it is unpeopled? No:
+       Tongues I'll hang on every tree,
+       That shall civil sayings show:
+       Some, how brief the life of man
+       Runs his erring pilgrimage,
+       That the stretching of a span
+       Buckles in his sum of age;
+       Some, of violated vows
+       'Twixt the souls of friend and friend:
+       But upon the fairest boughs,
+       Or at every sentence end,
+       Will I Rosalinda write,
+       Teaching all that read to know
+       The quintessence of every sprite
+       Heaven would in little show.
+       Therefore Heaven Nature charged
+       That one body should be fill'd
+       With all graces wide-enlarged:
+       Nature presently distill'd
+       Helen's cheek, but not her heart,
+       Cleopatra's majesty,
+       Atalanta's better part,
+       Sad Lucretia's modesty.
+       Thus Rosalind of many parts
+       By heavenly synod was devised,
+       Of many faces, eyes and hearts,
+       To have the touches dearest prized.
+       Heaven would that she these gifts should have,
+       And I to live and die her slave.
+
+ROSALIND       O most gentle pulpiter! what tedious homily of love
+       have you wearied your parishioners withal, and never
+       cried 'Have patience, good people!'
+
+CELIA  How now! back, friends! Shepherd, go off a little.
+       Go with him, sirrah.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Come, shepherd, let us make an honourable retreat;
+       though not with bag and baggage, yet with scrip and scrippage.
+
+       [Exeunt CORIN and TOUCHSTONE]
+
+CELIA  Didst thou hear these verses?
+
+ROSALIND       O, yes, I heard them all, and more too; for some of
+       them had in them more feet than the verses would bear.
+
+CELIA  That's no matter: the feet might bear the verses.
+
+ROSALIND       Ay, but the feet were lame and could not bear
+       themselves without the verse and therefore stood
+       lamely in the verse.
+
+CELIA  But didst thou hear without wondering how thy name
+       should be hanged and carved upon these trees?
+
+ROSALIND       I was seven of the nine days out of the wonder
+       before you came; for look here what I found on a
+       palm-tree. I was never so be-rhymed since
+       Pythagoras' time, that I was an Irish rat, which I
+       can hardly remember.
+
+CELIA  Trow you who hath done this?
+
+ROSALIND       Is it a man?
+
+CELIA  And a chain, that you once wore, about his neck.
+       Change you colour?
+
+ROSALIND       I prithee, who?
+
+CELIA  O Lord, Lord! it is a hard matter for friends to
+       meet; but mountains may be removed with earthquakes
+       and so encounter.
+
+ROSALIND       Nay, but who is it?
+
+CELIA  Is it possible?
+
+ROSALIND       Nay, I prithee now with most petitionary vehemence,
+       tell me who it is.
+
+CELIA  O wonderful, wonderful, and most wonderful
+       wonderful! and yet again wonderful, and after that,
+       out of all hooping!
+
+ROSALIND       Good my complexion! dost thou think, though I am
+       caparisoned like a man, I have a doublet and hose in
+       my disposition? One inch of delay more is a
+       South-sea of discovery; I prithee, tell me who is it
+       quickly, and speak apace. I would thou couldst
+       stammer, that thou mightst pour this concealed man
+       out of thy mouth, as wine comes out of a narrow-
+       mouthed bottle, either too much at once, or none at
+       all. I prithee, take the cork out of thy mouth that
+       may drink thy tidings.
+
+CELIA  So you may put a man in your belly.
+
+ROSALIND       Is he of God's making? What manner of man? Is his
+       head worth a hat, or his chin worth a beard?
+
+CELIA  Nay, he hath but a little beard.
+
+ROSALIND       Why, God will send more, if the man will be
+       thankful: let me stay the growth of his beard, if
+       thou delay me not the knowledge of his chin.
+
+CELIA  It is young Orlando, that tripped up the wrestler's
+       heels and your heart both in an instant.
+
+ROSALIND       Nay, but the devil take mocking: speak, sad brow and
+       true maid.
+
+CELIA  I' faith, coz, 'tis he.
+
+ROSALIND       Orlando?
+
+CELIA  Orlando.
+
+ROSALIND       Alas the day! what shall I do with my doublet and
+       hose? What did he when thou sawest him? What said
+       he? How looked he? Wherein went he? What makes
+       him here? Did he ask for me? Where remains he?
+       How parted he with thee? and when shalt thou see
+       him again? Answer me in one word.
+
+CELIA  You must borrow me Gargantua's mouth first: 'tis a
+       word too great for any mouth of this age's size. To
+       say ay and no to these particulars is more than to
+       answer in a catechism.
+
+ROSALIND       But doth he know that I am in this forest and in
+       man's apparel? Looks he as freshly as he did the
+       day he wrestled?
+
+CELIA  It is as easy to count atomies as to resolve the
+       propositions of a lover; but take a taste of my
+       finding him, and relish it with good observance.
+       I found him under a tree, like a dropped acorn.
+
+ROSALIND       It may well be called Jove's tree, when it drops
+       forth such fruit.
+
+CELIA  Give me audience, good madam.
+
+ROSALIND       Proceed.
+
+CELIA  There lay he, stretched along, like a wounded knight.
+
+ROSALIND       Though it be pity to see such a sight, it well
+       becomes the ground.
+
+CELIA  Cry 'holla' to thy tongue, I prithee; it curvets
+       unseasonably. He was furnished like a hunter.
+
+ROSALIND       O, ominous! he comes to kill my heart.
+
+CELIA  I would sing my song without a burden: thou bringest
+       me out of tune.
+
+ROSALIND       Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must
+       speak. Sweet, say on.
+
+CELIA  You bring me out. Soft! comes he not here?
+
+       [Enter ORLANDO and JAQUES]
+
+ROSALIND       'Tis he: slink by, and note him.
+
+JAQUES I thank you for your company; but, good faith, I had
+       as lief have been myself alone.
+
+ORLANDO        And so had I; but yet, for fashion sake, I thank you
+       too for your society.
+
+JAQUES God be wi' you: let's meet as little as we can.
+
+ORLANDO        I do desire we may be better strangers.
+
+JAQUES I pray you, mar no more trees with writing
+       love-songs in their barks.
+
+ORLANDO        I pray you, mar no more of my verses with reading
+       them ill-favouredly.
+
+JAQUES Rosalind is your love's name?
+
+ORLANDO        Yes, just.
+
+JAQUES I do not like her name.
+
+ORLANDO        There was no thought of pleasing you when she was
+       christened.
+
+JAQUES What stature is she of?
+
+ORLANDO        Just as high as my heart.
+
+JAQUES You are full of pretty answers. Have you not been
+       acquainted with goldsmiths' wives, and conned them
+       out of rings?
+
+ORLANDO        Not so; but I answer you right painted cloth, from
+       whence you have studied your questions.
+
+JAQUES You have a nimble wit: I think 'twas made of
+       Atalanta's heels. Will you sit down with me? and
+       we two will rail against our mistress the world and
+       all our misery.
+
+ORLANDO        I will chide no breather in the world but myself,
+       against whom I know most faults.
+
+JAQUES The worst fault you have is to be in love.
+
+ORLANDO        'Tis a fault I will not change for your best virtue.
+       I am weary of you.
+
+JAQUES By my troth, I was seeking for a fool when I found
+       you.
+
+ORLANDO        He is drowned in the brook: look but in, and you
+       shall see him.
+
+JAQUES There I shall see mine own figure.
+
+ORLANDO        Which I take to be either a fool or a cipher.
+
+JAQUES I'll tarry no longer with you: farewell, good
+       Signior Love.
+
+ORLANDO        I am glad of your departure: adieu, good Monsieur
+       Melancholy.
+
+       [Exit JAQUES]
+
+ROSALIND       [Aside to CELIA]  I will speak to him, like a saucy
+       lackey and under that habit play the knave with him.
+       Do you hear, forester?
+
+ORLANDO        Very well: what would you?
+
+ROSALIND       I pray you, what is't o'clock?
+
+ORLANDO        You should ask me what time o' day: there's no clock
+       in the forest.
+
+ROSALIND       Then there is no true lover in the forest; else
+       sighing every minute and groaning every hour would
+       detect the lazy foot of Time as well as a clock.
+
+ORLANDO        And why not the swift foot of Time? had not that
+       been as proper?
+
+ROSALIND       By no means, sir: Time travels in divers paces with
+       divers persons. I'll tell you who Time ambles
+       withal, who Time trots withal, who Time gallops
+       withal and who he stands still withal.
+
+ORLANDO        I prithee, who doth he trot withal?
+
+ROSALIND       Marry, he trots hard with a young maid between the
+       contract of her marriage and the day it is
+       solemnized: if the interim be but a se'nnight,
+       Time's pace is so hard that it seems the length of
+       seven year.
+
+ORLANDO        Who ambles Time withal?
+
+ROSALIND       With a priest that lacks Latin and a rich man that
+       hath not the gout, for the one sleeps easily because
+       he cannot study, and the other lives merrily because
+       he feels no pain, the one lacking the burden of lean
+       and wasteful learning, the other knowing no burden
+       of heavy tedious penury; these Time ambles withal.
+
+ORLANDO        Who doth he gallop withal?
+
+ROSALIND       With a thief to the gallows, for though he go as
+       softly as foot can fall, he thinks himself too soon there.
+
+ORLANDO        Who stays it still withal?
+
+ROSALIND       With lawyers in the vacation, for they sleep between
+       term and term and then they perceive not how Time moves.
+
+ORLANDO        Where dwell you, pretty youth?
+
+ROSALIND       With this shepherdess, my sister; here in the
+       skirts of the forest, like fringe upon a petticoat.
+
+ORLANDO        Are you native of this place?
+
+ROSALIND       As the cony that you see dwell where she is kindled.
+
+ORLANDO        Your accent is something finer than you could
+       purchase in so removed a dwelling.
+
+ROSALIND       I have been told so of many: but indeed an old
+       religious uncle of mine taught me to speak, who was
+       in his youth an inland man; one that knew courtship
+       too well, for there he fell in love. I have heard
+       him read many lectures against it, and I thank God
+       I am not a woman, to be touched with so many
+       giddy offences as he hath generally taxed their
+       whole sex withal.
+
+ORLANDO        Can you remember any of the principal evils that he
+       laid to the charge of women?
+
+ROSALIND       There were none principal; they were all like one
+       another as half-pence are, every one fault seeming
+       monstrous till his fellow fault came to match it.
+
+ORLANDO        I prithee, recount some of them.
+
+ROSALIND       No, I will not cast away my physic but on those that
+       are sick. There is a man haunts the forest, that
+       abuses our young plants with carving 'Rosalind' on
+       their barks; hangs odes upon hawthorns and elegies
+       on brambles, all, forsooth, deifying the name of
+       Rosalind: if I could meet that fancy-monger I would
+       give him some good counsel, for he seems to have the
+       quotidian of love upon him.
+
+ORLANDO        I am he that is so love-shaked: I pray you tell me
+       your remedy.
+
+ROSALIND       There is none of my uncle's marks upon you: he
+       taught me how to know a man in love; in which cage
+       of rushes I am sure you are not prisoner.
+
+ORLANDO        What were his marks?
+
+ROSALIND       A lean cheek, which you have not, a blue eye and
+       sunken, which you have not, an unquestionable
+       spirit, which you have not, a beard neglected,
+       which you have not; but I pardon you for that, for
+       simply your having in beard is a younger brother's
+       revenue: then your hose should be ungartered, your
+       bonnet unbanded, your sleeve unbuttoned, your shoe
+       untied and every thing about you demonstrating a
+       careless desolation; but you are no such man; you
+       are rather point-device in your accoutrements as
+       loving yourself than seeming the lover of any other.
+
+ORLANDO        Fair youth, I would I could make thee believe I love.
+
+ROSALIND       Me believe it! you may as soon make her that you
+       love believe it; which, I warrant, she is apter to
+       do than to confess she does: that is one of the
+       points in the which women still give the lie to
+       their consciences. But, in good sooth, are you he
+       that hangs the verses on the trees, wherein Rosalind
+       is so admired?
+
+ORLANDO        I swear to thee, youth, by the white hand of
+       Rosalind, I am that he, that unfortunate he.
+
+ROSALIND       But are you so much in love as your rhymes speak?
+
+ORLANDO        Neither rhyme nor reason can express how much.
+
+ROSALIND       Love is merely a madness, and, I tell you, deserves
+       as well a dark house and a whip as madmen do: and
+       the reason why they are not so punished and cured
+       is, that the lunacy is so ordinary that the whippers
+       are in love too. Yet I profess curing it by counsel.
+
+ORLANDO        Did you ever cure any so?
+
+ROSALIND       Yes, one, and in this manner. He was to imagine me
+       his love, his mistress; and I set him every day to
+       woo me: at which time would I, being but a moonish
+       youth, grieve, be effeminate, changeable, longing
+       and liking, proud, fantastical, apish, shallow,
+       inconstant, full of tears, full of smiles, for every
+       passion something and for no passion truly any
+       thing, as boys and women are for the most part
+       cattle of this colour; would now like him, now loathe
+       him; then entertain him, then forswear him; now weep
+       for him, then spit at him; that I drave my suitor
+       from his mad humour of love to a living humour of
+       madness; which was, to forswear the full stream of
+       the world, and to live in a nook merely monastic.
+       And thus I cured him; and this way will I take upon
+       me to wash your liver as clean as a sound sheep's
+       heart, that there shall not be one spot of love in't.
+
+ORLANDO        I would not be cured, youth.
+
+ROSALIND       I would cure you, if you would but call me Rosalind
+       and come every day to my cote and woo me.
+
+ORLANDO        Now, by the faith of my love, I will: tell me
+       where it is.
+
+ROSALIND       Go with me to it and I'll show it you and by the way
+       you shall tell me where in the forest you live.
+       Will you go?
+
+ORLANDO        With all my heart, good youth.
+
+ROSALIND       Nay you must call me Rosalind. Come, sister, will you go?
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT III
+
+
+
+SCENE III      The forest.
+
+
+       [Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY; JAQUES behind]
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Come apace, good Audrey: I will fetch up your
+       goats, Audrey. And how, Audrey? am I the man yet?
+       doth my simple feature content you?
+
+AUDREY Your features! Lord warrant us! what features!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     I am here with thee and thy goats, as the most
+       capricious poet, honest Ovid, was among the Goths.
+
+JAQUES [Aside]  O knowledge ill-inhabited, worse than Jove
+       in a thatched house!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     When a man's verses cannot be understood, nor a
+       man's good wit seconded with the forward child
+       Understanding, it strikes a man more dead than a
+       great reckoning in a little room. Truly, I would
+       the gods had made thee poetical.
+
+AUDREY I do not know what 'poetical' is: is it honest in
+       deed and word? is it a true thing?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     No, truly; for the truest poetry is the most
+       feigning; and lovers are given to poetry, and what
+       they swear in poetry may be said as lovers they do feign.
+
+AUDREY Do you wish then that the gods had made me poetical?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     I do, truly; for thou swearest to me thou art
+       honest: now, if thou wert a poet, I might have some
+       hope thou didst feign.
+
+AUDREY Would you not have me honest?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     No, truly, unless thou wert hard-favoured; for
+       honesty coupled to beauty is to have honey a sauce to sugar.
+
+JAQUES [Aside]  A material fool!
+
+AUDREY  Well, I am not fair; and therefore I pray the gods
+       make me honest.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Truly, and to cast away honesty upon a foul slut
+       were to put good meat into an unclean dish.
+
+AUDREY I am not a slut, though I thank the gods I am foul.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Well, praised be the gods for thy foulness!
+       sluttishness may come hereafter. But be it as it may
+       be, I will marry thee, and to that end I have been
+       with Sir Oliver Martext, the vicar of the next
+       village, who hath promised to meet me in this place
+       of the forest and to couple us.
+
+JAQUES [Aside]  I would fain see this meeting.
+
+AUDREY Well, the gods give us joy!
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Amen. A man may, if he were of a fearful heart,
+       stagger in this attempt; for here we have no temple
+       but the wood, no assembly but horn-beasts. But what
+       though? Courage! As horns are odious, they are
+       necessary. It is said, 'many a man knows no end of
+       his goods:' right; many a man has good horns, and
+       knows no end of them. Well, that is the dowry of
+       his wife; 'tis none of his own getting. Horns?
+       Even so. Poor men alone? No, no; the noblest deer
+       hath them as huge as the rascal. Is the single man
+       therefore blessed? No: as a walled town is more
+       worthier than a village, so is the forehead of a
+       married man more honourable than the bare brow of a
+       bachelor; and by how much defence is better than no
+       skill, by so much is a horn more precious than to
+       want. Here comes Sir Oliver.
+
+       [Enter SIR OLIVER MARTEXT]
+
+       Sir Oliver Martext, you are well met: will you
+       dispatch us here under this tree, or shall we go
+       with you to your chapel?
+
+SIR OLIVER MARTEXT     Is there none here to give the woman?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     I will not take her on gift of any man.
+
+SIR OLIVER MARTEXT     Truly, she must be given, or the marriage is not lawful.
+
+JAQUES [Advancing]
+
+       Proceed, proceed        I'll give her.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     Good even, good Master What-ye-call't: how do you,
+       sir? You are very well met: God 'ild you for your
+       last company: I am very glad to see you: even a
+       toy in hand here, sir: nay, pray be covered.
+
+JAQUES Will you be married, motley?
+
+TOUCHSTONE     As the ox hath his bow, sir, the horse his curb and
+       the falcon her bells, so man hath his desires; and
+       as pigeons bill, so wedlock would be nibbling.
+
+JAQUES And will you, being a man of your breeding, be
+       married under a bush like a beggar? Get you to
+       church, and have a good priest that can tell you
+       what marriage is: this fellow will but join you
+       together as they join wainscot; then one of you will
+       prove a shrunk panel and, like green timber, warp, warp.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     [Aside]  I am not in the mind but I were better to be
+       married of him than of another: for he is not like
+       to marry me well; and not being well married, it
+       will be a good excuse for me hereafter to leave my wife.
+
+JAQUES Go thou with me, and let me counsel thee.
+
+TOUCHSTONE     'Come, sweet Audrey:
+       We must be married, or we must live in bawdry.
+       Farewell, good Master Oliver: not,--
+       O sweet Oliver,
+       O brave Oliver,
+       Leave me not behind thee: but,--
+       Wind away,
+       Begone, I say,
+       I will not to wedding with thee.
+
+       [Exeunt JAQUES, TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY]
+
+SIR OLIVER MARTEXT     'Tis no matter: ne'er a fantastical knave of them
+       all shall flout me out of my calling.
+
+       [Exit]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT III
+
+
+
+SCENE IV       The forest.
+
+
+       [Enter ROSALIND and CELIA]
+
+ROSALIND       Never talk to me; I will weep.
+
+CELIA  Do, I prithee; but yet have the grace to consider
+       that tears do not become a man.
+
+ROSALIND       But have I not cause to weep?
+
+CELIA  As good cause as one would desire; therefore weep.
+
+ROSALIND       His very hair is of the dissembling colour.
+
+CELIA  Something browner than Judas's marry, his kisses are
+       Judas's own children.
+
+ROSALIND       I' faith, his hair is of a good colour.
+
+CELIA  An excellent colour: your chestnut was ever the only colour.
+
+ROSALIND       And his kissing is as full of sanctity as the touch
+       of holy bread.
+
+CELIA  He hath bought a pair of cast lips of Diana: a nun
+       of winter's sisterhood kisses not more religiously;
+       the very ice of chastity is in them.
+
+ROSALIND       But why did he swear he would come this morning, and
+       comes not?
+
+CELIA  Nay, certainly, there is no truth in him.
+
+ROSALIND       Do you think so?
+
+CELIA  Yes; I think he is not a pick-purse nor a
+       horse-stealer, but for his verity in love, I do
+       think him as concave as a covered goblet or a
+       worm-eaten nut.
+
+ROSALIND       Not true in love?
+
+CELIA  Yes, when he is in; but I think he is not in.
+
+ROSALIND       You have heard him swear downright he was.
+
+CELIA  'Was' is not 'is:' besides, the oath of a lover is
+       no stronger than the word of a tapster; they are
+       both the confirmer of false reckonings. He attends
+       here in the forest on the duke your father.
+
+ROSALIND       I met the duke yesterday and had much question with
+       him: he asked me of what parentage I was; I told
+       him, of as good as he; so he laughed and let me go.
+       But what talk we of fathers, when there is such a
+       man as Orlando?
+
+CELIA  O, that's a brave man! he writes brave verses,
+       speaks brave words, swears brave oaths and breaks
+       them bravely, quite traverse, athwart the heart of
+       his lover; as a puisny tilter, that spurs his horse
+       but on one side, breaks his staff like a noble
+       goose: but all's brave that youth mounts and folly
+       guides. Who comes here?
+
+       [Enter CORIN]
+
+CORIN  Mistress and master, you have oft inquired
+       After the shepherd that complain'd of love,
+       Who you saw sitting by me on the turf,
+       Praising the proud disdainful shepherdess
+       That was his mistress.
+
+CELIA  Well, and what of him?
+
+CORIN  If you will see a pageant truly play'd,
+       Between the pale complexion of true love
+       And the red glow of scorn and proud disdain,
+       Go hence a little and I shall conduct you,
+       If you will mark it.
+
+ROSALIND       O, come, let us remove:
+       The sight of lovers feedeth those in love.
+       Bring us to this sight, and you shall say
+       I'll prove a busy actor in their play.
+
+       [Exeunt]
+
+
+
+
+       AS YOU LIKE IT
+
+
+ACT III
+
+
+
+SCENE V        Another part of the forest.
+
+
+       [Enter SILVIUS and PHEBE]
+
+SILVIUS        Sweet Phebe, do not scorn me; do not, Phebe;
+       Say that you love me not, but say not so
+       In bitterness. The common executioner,
+       Whose heart the accustom'd sight of death makes hard,
+       Falls not the axe upon the humbled neck
+       But first begs pardon: will you sterner be
+       Than he that dies and lives by bloody drops?
+
+       [Enter ROSALIND, CELIA, and CORIN, behind]
+
+PHEBE  I would not be thy executioner:
+       I fly thee, for I would not injure thee.
+       Thou tell'st me there is murder in mine eye:
+       'Tis pretty, sure, and very probable,
+       That eyes, that are the frail'st and softest things,
+       Who shut their coward gates on atomies,
+       Should be call'd tyrants, butchers, murderers!
+       Now I do frown on thee with all my heart;
+       And if mine eyes can wound, now let them kill thee:
+       Now counterfeit to swoon; why now fall down;
+       Or if thou canst not, O, for shame, for shame,
+       Lie not, to say mine eyes are murderers!
+       Now show the wound mine eye hath made in thee:
+       Scratch thee but with a pin, and there remains
+       Some scar of it; lean but upon a rush,
+       The cicatrice and capable impressure
+       Thy palm some moment keeps; but now mine eyes,
+       Which I have darted at thee, hurt thee not,
+       Nor, I am sure, there is no force in eyes
+       That can do hurt.
+
+SILVIUS                          O dear Phebe,
+       If ever,--as that ever may be near,--
+       You meet in some fresh cheek the power of fancy,
+       Then shall you know the wounds invisible
+       That love's keen arrows make.
+
+PHEBE  But till that time
+       Come not thou near me: and when that time comes,
+       Afflict me with thy mocks, pity me not;
+       As till that time I shall not pity thee.
+
+ROSALIND       And why, I pray you? Who might be your mother,
+       That you insult, exult, and all at once,
+       Over the wretched? What though you have no beauty,--
+       As, by my faith, I see no more in you
+       Than without candle may go dark to bed--
+       Must you be therefore proud and pitiless?
+       Why, what means this? Why do you look on me?
+       I see no more in you than in the ordinary
+       Of nature's sale-work. 'Od's my little life,
+       I think she means to tangle my eyes too!
+       No, faith, proud mistress, hope not after it:
+       'Tis not your inky brows, your black silk hair,
+       Your bugle eyeballs, nor your cheek of cream,
+       That can entame my spirits to your worship.
+       You foolish shepherd, wherefore do you follow her,
+       Like foggy south puffing with wind and rain?
+       You are a thousand times a properer man
+       Than she a woman: 'tis such fools as you
+       That makes the world full of ill-favour'd children:
+       'Tis not her glass, but you, that flatters her;
+       And out of you she sees herself more proper
+       Than any of her lineaments can show her.
+       But, mistress, know yourself: down on your knees,
+       And thank heaven, fasting, for a good man's love:
+       For I must tell you friendly in your ear,
+       Sell when you can: you are not for all markets:
+       Cry the man mercy; love him; take his offer:
+       Foul is most foul, being foul to be a scoffer.
+       So take her to thee, shepherd: fare you well.
+
+PHEBE  Sweet youth, I pray you, chide a year together:
+       I had rather hear you chide than this man woo.
+
+ROSALIND       He's fallen in love with your foulness and she'll
+       fall in love with my anger. If it be so, as fast as
+       she answers thee with frowning looks, I'll sauce her
+       with bitter words. Why look you so upon me?
+
+PHEBE  For no ill will I bear you.
+
+ROSALIND       I pray you, do not fall in love with me,
+       For I am falser than vows made in wine:
+       Besides, I like you not. If you will know my house,
+       'Tis at the tuft of olives here hard by.
+       Will you go, sister? Shepherd, ply her hard.
+       Come, sister. Shepherdess, look on him better,
+       And be not proud: though all the world could see,
+       None could be so abused in sight as he.
+       Come, to our flock.
+
+       [Exeunt ROSALIND, CELIA and CORIN]
+
+PHEBE  Dead Shepherd, now I find thy saw of might,
+       'Who ever loved that loved not at first sight?'
+
+SILVIUS        Sweet Phebe,--
+
+PHEBE                    Ha, what say'st thou, Silvius?
+
+SILVIUS        Sweet Phebe, pity me.
+
+PHEBE  Why, I am sorry for thee, gentle Silvius.
+
+SILVIUS        Wherever sorrow is, relief would be:
+       If you do sorrow at my grief in love,
+       By giving love your sorrow and my grief
+       Were both extermined.
+
+PHEBE  Thou hast my love: is not that neighbourly?
+
+SILVIUS        I would have you.
+
+PHEBE                    Why, that were covetousness.
+       Silvius, the time was that I hated thee,
+       And yet it is not that I bear thee love;
+       But since that thou canst talk of love so well,
+       Thy company, which erst was irksome to me,
+       I will endure, and I'll employ thee too:
+       But do not look for further recompense
+       Than thine own gladness that thou art employ'd.
+
+SILVIUS        So holy and so perfect is my love,
+       And I in such a poverty of grace,
+       That I shall think it a most plenteous crop
+       To glean the broken ears after the man
+       That the main harvest reaps: loose now and then
+       A scatter'd smile, and that I'll live upon.
+
+PHEBE  Know'st now the youth that spoke to me erewhile?
+
+SILVIUS        Not very well, but I have met him oft;
+       And he hath bought the cottage and the bounds
+       That the old carlot once was master of.
+
+PHEBE  Think not I love him, though I ask for him:
+       'Tis but a peevish boy; yet he talks well;
+       But what care I for words? yet words do well
+       When he that speaks them pleases those that hear.
+       It is a pretty youth: not very pretty:
+       But, sure, he's proud, and yet his pride becomes him:
+       He'll make a proper man: the best thing in him
+       Is his complexion; and faster than his tongue
+       Did make offence his eye did heal it up.
+       He is not very tall; yet for his years he's tall:
+       His leg is but so so; and yet 'tis well:
+       There was a pretty redness in his lip,
+       A little riper and more lusty red
+       Than that mix'd in his cheek; 'twas just the difference
+       Between the constant red and mingled damask.
+       There be some women, Silvius, had they mark'd him
+       In parcels as I did, would have gone near
+       To fall in love with him; but, for my part,
+       I love him not nor hate him not; and yet
+       I have more cause to hate him than to love him:
+       For what had he to do to chide at me?
+       He said mine eyes were black and my hair black:
+       And, now I am remember'd, scorn'd at me:
+       I marvel why I answer'd not again:
+       But that's all one; omittance is no quittance.
+       I'll write to him a very taunting letter,
+       And thou shalt bear it: wilt thou, Silvius?
+
+SILVIUS        Phebe, with all my heart.
+
+PHEBE  I'll write it straight;
+       The matter's in my head and in my heart:
+       I will be bitter with him and passing short.
+       Go with me, 

<TRUNCATED>

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