2009/11/30 Brolin Empey <bro...@brolin.be>: > 2009/11/12 Brolin Empey <bro...@brolin.be> >> >> Hello list, >> >> I am writing a follow-up/update to my original post just over 2 months >> later. >> >> What has changed since my original post? > > Another update. What has changed since my last update?
I finally chose and ordered a laptop (a Dell Vostro V13) so I can use the same PC at home and work. Of course, I am already regretting my choice, but at least I chose something. I always seem to regret my computer purchases. I have started moving most of the crap I am packratting to my new apartment. I have to wait until Sat, 2010-01-09 to move my furniture because that is when I planned to have my sister and friend help me. I am afraid I am going to be even lonelier living alone instead of with my parents, but at least I will have more privacy. I am also afraid I am going to starve because I dislike having to stop what I am doing to buy food, prepare meals, clean up after meals, etc. Food preparation does not interest me because the results seem so extremely ephemeral. I am an intellectual and emotional animal (person) who wants to understand himself by self-study and communication without having to (what seems like) always worry about eating because my mind is embodied in the body of an animal, which I do not understand. I really wish I did not have to eat because it would make my life so much easier. I do not know how to describe my mental state properly, but I always seem to be seeking an answer which cannot be found. I know, this sounds like Neo in The Matrix. :P I wonder if my mental processes are really so unusual because they usually seem strange to me. I am still lonely because I have no female companion, but at least I have my male friends, even if I rarely meet them in person. I know I have to try new things (go to unfamiliar events and/or places) to meet girls, but I have been isolating myself more again because that is how I am. I do not know what is wrong with me, but I end up making myself so lonely because I am so inclined to isolate myself. My parents and teachers have noticed my lack of (face-to-face/in person) peer interaction and have been concerned about it since elementary/primary school. I do not understand how non-autistic people can seem to function so much better than me and easily have more close friendships than me. _______________________________________________ Openmoko community mailing list community@lists.openmoko.org http://lists.openmoko.org/mailman/listinfo/community