Second the Grand March, super simple square-ish dance, and some kind of Virginia Reel—especially for more thematic weddings. Also a scatter promenade (WITH partner), Big Circle with no partners needed, and La Bastringue.
I would not bother with ballroom swings, and building to a contra is only relevant if that’s what the couple wants and they are specifically inviting people to a DANCE. One thing I haven’t seen mentioned is Favor of the Rose: it is an absolute favorite of mine and my dance community. Favor of the Rose -Line up three chairs and get a rose (or whatever). -Form two lines of people, one on either side (any criteria, inequal is 💯 fine). -Position the bride or groom in the middle chair and give them the rose. -Bring two people from one line and have them sit. Center person gives rose to one, dances up center with the other. -Remaining person moves to center chair. Repeat, alternating lines. Neal Schlein On Tue, Jul 4, 2023 at 3:14 PM Mac Mckeever via Contra Callers < contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > I always start with a grand march - no teaching and eases some of the fear > of doing other dances > > You can put the bride and groom in the second slot and announce they > request participation from all guests > > Mac > > On Tuesday, July 4, 2023 at 04:10:09 PM CDT, Rich Sbardella via Contra > Callers <contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > > I am enjoying this thread. > > I have called weddings with a full dance floor with long periods of > dancing, and others which have a few dancers who only dance for a short > period. I had always felt like I failed when I did not get the > participation I imagined, but I too have learned that our dances flavor the > event, but we are not the main attraction. > > I do not generally require deposits for party dances, but I do for > weddings and outdoor events. I had a wedding to call last month that was > cancelled about seven days before the scheduled date, and without > an explanation. It was the first time in 30 years that I kept a deposit, > and I am still conflicted about it. Any previous cancellations were > weather related, and I applied the deposit to a rescheduled event. > > I have also called several wedding rehearsal dances, and generally get > great participation from the attendees. > > One of my favorite dances for weddings and rehearsal dinners is Rural > Felicity. > At such events I rename the dance to Tunnel of Love, and I have the Bride > and Groom as the 1st Top Couple. > > A1 LL F&B, Top Pair Sashay to foot > A2 LL F&B, Same Pair Sashay to top > B1 P DSD, 2 Hand Turn and Make an Arch (Tunnel) > B2 Top Pair lead down under the Arches > > I have a wedding to call this weekend, and I am looking forward to it. > > Rich Sbardella > Stafford Springs, CT > > On Tue, Jul 4, 2023 at 2:43 PM Erik Hoffman via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > I, too, have called for a lot of parties and weddings. Keeping it > simple—whole set dances such as The Virginia Reel (without the reel). > > > > And, I actually wrote a book about it: *Old-Time Dance Calling for > Weddings, Parties, and One-Night Stands*. > > > > I do differentiate weddings from other parties that are organized around > the idea that there will be a dance, such as schools, some sort of a club, > or even a birthday party: > > > > Weddings are to gather families and friends of the Bride & Groom to get > together and meet each other—often for the first time—and get a chance to > get to know each other. Weddings are not to get together to dance. We > callers serve a wonderful service to use dance to get these friends and > families to interact with each other. > > > > Tony says he rarely uses a mixer at a wedding. Maybe it’s that I live in > Oakland, California, and don’t often go far from the “Liberal” west. I > always start simple circle left, circle right, into the center & back X2, > Swing Somebody (elbow swing or two hand swing). I might add: and Promenade. > End with: … “into the middle if you’ve just got married!” Then the Virginia > Reel. > > > > Often, after that the dancing crowd gets a lot thinner. One of the first > weddings I called, I think I got trough three dances. After that, waltzes > and tunes. I thought, “I barely did anything…” Then I got the thank you > notes: Comments about how great the dance created what the bride and groom > wanted. I started realizing at weddings we’re offering a service of helping > people connect with each other, and that can be successful with two or > three dances. If people use the rest of the time to talk with each other, > the job can be done. > > > > That’s not to say I’ve called a lot of weddings when it’s clear a number > of guests want to keep dancing, and might even get to one hands-four dance > as Haste to the Wedding or Jefferson & Liberty, but that’s a judgement > call. It’s just that many times two or three dances brings people together > in ways other dance forms often fail to do. > > > > ~Erik Hoffman > > Oakland, CA > > > > > > *From:* Tony Parkes via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> > *Sent:* Tuesday, July 4, 2023 7:31 AM > *To:* Shared Weight Callers <contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> > *Subject:* [Callers] Re: calling weddings > > > > > > It looks as if we’re all agreed that **really** easy dances are the way > to go at weddings (and similar events where no one is there to learn), but > disagree on what constitutes “really easy.” > > > > The sequence that John Rogers describes is similar to the Scatter Sanita > that I use at nearly every one-nighter, including weddings. But I think the > loss of original partner would feel to most wedding guests like “one thing > too many” – and a much bigger “thing” than any of the moves such as dosido > or swing. > > > > At all my one-nighters – heck, at all my events, including contra-series > dances – I use a combination of (1) my best pre-event guess of what’s > needed, based on my experience with similar events, and (2) reading the > room when I get there. Although I absolutely love mixers (and always call > one at series dances, though I know a few contra dancers say they dislike > them), my sense is that wedding guests feel shaky enough about joining in > the dancing and that losing their partner and having to search for a new > one would add a major dose of shakiness with nothing positive to > compensate. If I use any mixer at all, it will likely be Heel and Toe (aka > Pattycake Polka), where the next partner is right there and they don’t have > to decide on one – and although I use it fairly often at one-nighters, I’m > much less likely to use it at weddings. > > > > Time allowed for dancing: I’ve found that at the vast majority of my > one-nighters, including weddings, I end up doing either 2 or 3 sets of > 30-40 minutes each, usually 2. (The first one is often a bit longer than > the others, as it takes a while to get everyone quiet and listening.) So I > tell the couple (or whoever is my contact) in advance that that’s what I > envision, but that it’s subject to modifying as things unfold. My average > is probably about 6 dance numbers total, but a few times I’ve done only the > initial big circle and a Virginia Reel; once I did only the big circle. > It’s important to remember that the organizers and guests have no > preconceived idea of what constitutes a dance event; they’re not expecting > 12 aerobic dances and a waltz. You may feel you haven’t earned your keep, > but the clients are more than satisfied. (I always make it clear that I’m > willing to call as long as there are a few couples who want to dance; > almost never do I get taken up on the offer.) > > > > Every caller will have a slightly different way of turning vision into > reality (and that’s as it should be with a folk art), but hopefully always > with a view to what will give the greatest number of people a taste of the > joy that we know is there in the dance. > > > > Tony Parkes > > Billerica, Mass. > > www.hands4.com > > New book! Square Dance Calling: An Old Art for a New Century > > (available now) > > > > > > *From:* Adam Carlson via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> > *Sent:* Tuesday, July 4, 2023 2:24 AM > *To:* Shared Weight Callers <contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> > *Subject:* [Callers] Re: calling weddings > > > > Heck, even that sounds too complex. Forming circles of 4, finding another > group, that took too long, what am I doing now, which one's my partner > again, and which is my opposite? Nah, Stick with longways lines, circles > and couple mixers until and unless people seem like they're actually into > it and want something more complicated. > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023 at 10:26 PM John Rogers via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > I’ll add two points of my own. I was once hired to call dances at a > wedding and I didn’t find out until the bride and groom emerged from the > chapel that the whole dance idea was orchestrated by others as a surprise > for the bride and groom. Since them I have had a strict policy that no > matters who hires me, I WILL discuss the program directly with the bride. > > > > The other thing I have learned about “one night stands” is to always try > to imagine the mindset of one of the participants as they enter the room. > Are they looking forward to a dance program, or are they there for other > reasons. (Weddings fall heavily in the “for other reasons” category.) > Unless it is the wedding of two contradancers and everybody there is a > dancer, keep in mind that participants did not come to the event thinking > they were going to learn anything that day. > > > > My last point (which follows from the above) is that there is no dance > that is too simple to call at a wedding. It is very easy to call a dance > that is too hard, but impossible to call one that is too simple. To give > an example, this simple scatter mixer works extremely well at weddings: > Circle left, circle right. Men DSD, Ladies DSD. Partner DSD, Opposites L > elbow swing, Scoop up opposite and promenade to find a different opposite > couple. (This is plenty complex enough to be entertaining at a wedding!) > > > > Good luck! > > Sent from my iPhone > > > > On Jul 3, 2023, at 4:07 PM, Roberta Kogut via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > > > I agree with a lot of what was said. I'll just add a couple of things. > > I always talk to the wedding couple, or mother or whoever is hiring me and > make sure I know their expectations and they know mine. If they are > serious contra dancers, I always make sure they understand that a dance > like what they are used to is not probably going to happen. I also ask > that they pass on to wedding guests that it is the couples wish that their > guests will dance together and wear or bring appropriate shoes. I always > start off with something like La Bastringue. Keep it easy and fun. Don't > go too long on any dance, but long enough that they really get it and are > having fun. I love doing mixers because they keep the guests mingling > together. I think that really pleases the B & G. > > I usually see a lot of people turned on to contra, so I do tell people > that if they have had a lot of fun they should "google" 'contra dancing > near me' when they get home, stressing that a regular contra dance can be > found all over the country. I try to stay as invisible as I can so it's > really about the wedding couple and their family and friends. > > Spread the love! > > Roberta Kogut > > > Get TypeApp for Android <http://www.typeapp.com/r> > > On Jul 3, 2023, at 5:44 PM, Lorraine Sutton via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > Hi > > > > I have done a lot of weddings.... > > > > Keep it very, very simple...yes... Barn dance, family dance, community > dance dances,. > > > > Never any contras ...too much work ...it all needs to be fun. > > > > Have the Bride and Groom done any trad dancing before this event? If not, > do impress on them that it is pretty essential that they dance the full > first set otherwise their guests will not feel required to do so. > > > > Two hand turn not a swing ...too hard to teach ( especially if they have > been drinking) > > > > Let the B & G know that they should let their guests know that there will > be traditional dancing and their participation is expected. Have them ask > the women to bring shoes for dancing ...flats , lace up s, NO FLIP FLOPS > or stiletto hells. > > > > Alcohol ...well ...Impress at some point that Booze does not help you > dance ..... > > > > Space....the standard " floor" in a wedding tent is never big enough, so > ask for a min of 40 square feet. > > > > Charge what is a decent fee (and if you have to drive more than 1.5 hours > each way charge a gas fee) > > or you will not be valued...Last Time I checked a DJ was charging about > $1,000 a night. Do you have a relaxed band (only need 2 fiddle and > keyboard) and if so can they bring the sound system? > > > > Lots of mixers....long way sets ...1 active couple ( ie Virginia Reel, > Bridge of Athlone etc) > > > > Easy Sicilian Circles...to have them practice right and left elbow, > do-si-do etc > > > > Will there be small children ...another issue. > > > > Timing ...Every wedding I have ever done is late ...speeches run over > time, catering gets delayed.etc. etc. etc. You may be invited to take part > in the dinner, however that usually means another extra 2-3 hours before > the dance... Once after waiting more than an extra hour I let the MC know > that ( given we had been paid , and we each had a 2 hour drive home) that > we would be leaving in 15 minutes if he did not get speeches wrapped up. > Harsh but real. > > > > Good Luck.... > > > > Lorraine Sutton Ontario, Canada > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023 at 4:30 PM Jerome Grisanti via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > I would release any idea that wedding guests will have any interest in > dancing beyond this event. Keep things VERY simple. You can do an hour with > dances containing only allemandes, do-si-dos, circles and promenades. Maybe > a modified swing/2-hand turn. > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023, 3:53 PM Joe Harrington via Contra Callers < > contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > Any advice for calling weddings? I've been asked to call my first one and > I don't see a lot of wedding-specific advice online. What do you ask them > in advance, how do you approach it, what are good dances to call? > > > > I'm assuming that a workshop is impractical, so it's barn dances and maybe > working up to a contra by the end? Try to teach a swing? Some advice I've > gotten so far: > > > > Band - can they play contras, am I DJing instead, if so what kind of > music, trad or pop? > > Floor - make sure it's big enough, get length, width, and surface > > Sound system - what is it and is there a sound tech? > > Duration - how long they'll want to dance > > Dancers - how many, any experienced guests? > > Special dances - first, parents, bouquet, last? > > Will the bride and groom dance? (If not, nobody will) > > Will there be alcohol? (one person suggested doubling the fee if there is) > > Will many women be in high heels? > > > > I welcome any advice! My main goal in taking wedding gigs is recruiting > new dancers to our local scene, if that matters. > > > > Thanks, > > > > --jh-- > > > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > ------------------------------ > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net > To unsubscribe send an email to contracallers-le...@lists.sharedweight.net > -- Neal Schlein Librarian, MSLIS
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