-Caveat Lector-

-----Original Message-----
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Cc: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Date: Sunday, January 17, 1999 2:29 PM
Subject: Re: [SC] Y2K bombs [was: SkeptiNews 990115a]


>>The obvious solution is to force the Pentagon to improve its software
>>and all other operations, by introducing competition - create two more
>>Pentagons, or at least have three agencies for every DoD function, each
>>agency competing with the others for quality/accuracy/economy/etc.  It's
>>this military monopoly that engenders all the Pentagon's dysfunctions.
>>Apply antitrust law to every military/police/gov't entity in the world,
>>and free-market forces would quickly optimize our public institutions.
>
>Request for Tender No. D99/0004
>IRAQI AIR STRIKES
>
>The federal government wishes to outsource its air strikes on Iraq.  The
exact
>schedule of targets is detailed in the attached specification.  The work is
>to be carried out in accordance with the terms and conditions of the
attached
>"slaughtering services contract".
>
>Tenders close 4 February 1998.  The winner shall be selected on the
following
>criteria :
>
>1) accuracy
>2) level of desructiveness vs price (value for money)
>3) ability to time attacks to divert people from Tricky dicky Willy
Clinton's
>latest sex scandal
>4) Local industry involvement in the task.
>
>Your tender should include the following information:
>
>1) number of cruise missiles available
>2) aircraft carriers and air wings available for deployment.
>3) proposed plan to assassinate Saddam Hussein.
>4) proposed methodology to prevent the media being at the marines first
landing
>point.
>5)ability to con the Brits and others into sending a 3 or 4 fighters so it
looks
>multi-national
>6) proposed emollient statement to use at the UN to explain why we ignored
them
>yet again.  (Saying "We ignored you because the UN is a futile, impotent
group
>of morons" will be considered tactless)
>
>If you have any queries about the military nature of this project please
telephone
>Tricky Dicky Willy Clinton on 555-12345
>
>If you have any qualms about the contract, or wish to ensure that the
tender
>is conducted fairly and openly, FOAD.
>
>Yours sincerely,
>
>
>J R Nasty
>for the Joint Chiefs of Staff
>Department of Defence
>hiefs of Staff
>Department of Defence
>Defence
>D%0AIf you have any qualms about the contract%2C or wish to ensure that the
tender is conducted fairly and openly%2C FOAD.%0D%0A%0D%0AYours
sincerely%2C%0D%0A%0D%0A%0D%0AJ R Nasty%0D%0Afor the Joint Chiefs of
Staff%0D%0ADepartment of Defence
>
>*** SkeptiChat: Ver. 0.98.09.27 *** depending on your needs,
>email "subscribe skeptichat" or "unsubscribe skeptichat" or
>"info skeptichat" or "help" to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
>

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