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--- Begin Message ----Caveat Lector-(satire alert) Al Qaeda Endores Bush for Re-Election by Al Qaeda â Friday March 19, 2004 at 03:01 PM Terrorists Thank Allah For America's 'Holy Idiot' POSTED: 11:19 a.m. EST March 18, 2004 CAIRO, Egypt -- An Islamic militant group claiming responsibility for the train bombings in Spain endorsed a second term for President George W. Bush yesterday, praising his "idiocy and religious fanaticism," which the group said is helping to "wake up" the Islamic world. In the statement, the group praised Allah for raising up the perfect leader to advance their cause, citing direct and plenary inspiration in Bush's calling the War on Terror a "crusade," turning the stomach of the entire world with constant lying and aggression, and placing thousands of U.S. soldiers in hopeless battle positions in the heart of the Middle East. "Truly we are blessed," said Mullah Omar from his mountain hideout in Afghanistan. "Never in our wildest imaginings could we have hoped for a gift more precious than Bush. He is the poster boy of our international movement." Even many Western analysts say that Bush's "Operation Sitting Duck" in Iraq is providing cheap and accessible apprenticeships for aspiring terrorists intending to graduate to targets inside the U.S. after getting some local experience under their belt. Islamic recruiters from Cairo to Western China say the phone has been ringing off the wall since Bush launched his world domination crusade. "I get no peace," complained a Moroccan recruiter. "All day and far into the night it's the same thing, one desperate voice after another begging to be allowed to help expel 'The Mother of all Idiots.'" "I barely get a chance to see my family anymore." Nevertheless, some recruiters are daring to speculate that Bush's penchant for self-destruction may eventually make Al Qaeda terror obsolete. "It's not hard to foresee a situation where Bush economic policies will destroy the U.S. outright without the aid of a single terrorist bombing," said Diaa Rashwan of the Institute For Suicide Analysis in Islamabad. "At that point blowing up individual targets in a collapsing infrastructure won't make much sense." Western terror experts are expressing concern over increasing perceptions of Bush as the world's number one terrorist even among non-Muslims. According to a recent Pew poll 94% of the world's non-Muslim population rates Bush more destructive than the H-bomb. "At least with the H-bomb, there is a way to dismantle it," said one respondent. "But with Bush, the scale of disaster just keeps widening. There's no end to it." Al Qaeda's endorsement of Bush raises the intriguing possibility of its sleeper cells in the U.S. campaigning for his election. With lots of ready cash the organization may find that leafleting for the GOP is the most cost-effective way to bring down the United States. Apparently many Al Qaeda recruits are beginning to feel that the self-hatred of the Republicans is more powerful than the purest streams of anti-American loathing on their part. Since very few self-respecting terrorists are prepared to admit they have superiors in the hatred department, this type of conclusion tends to be faced only gradually. "It's a psychological barrier, a kind of denial mechanism," says Psychiatrist John Blodgett at Johns Hopkins University. "Terrorists pride themselves on belonging to the most destructive and fearsome group in the world. But this Bush gang is a nihilist's wet dream. No one really compares to them in the power of their malevolence. Hard as it is to face, more and more Al Qaeda members are reluctantly beginning to admit it." The obvious policy conclusion has been stated in the latest and shortest video ever from Osama Bin Laden. "Four more years!" Copyright 2004 by The GWB Press. All rights reserved. This material may be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. PS: New Rules of 'Murkan Mockracy 1. Those with the gold make the rules. 2. Kiss up and shit down. 3. Image trumps reality. 4. Lie 'till you die. ------------------------------------------------------ Evan Ravitz 303 440 6838 [EMAIL PROTECTED] Please Ratify the National Initiative! http://Vote.org Photo Adventures: http://Vote.org/photos Bush vs the Pope! http://Vote.org/Bush Sins of the father Bush http://Vote.org/silence NORAD's website a 9/11 "smoking gun"? http://Vote.org/911 Volunteer to hand count 2004 election http://Vote.org/hand www.ctrl.org DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substanceânot soap-boxingâplease! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'âwith its many half-truths, mis- directions and outright fraudsâis used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. ======================================================================== Archives Available at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ <A HREF="http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/">ctrl</A> ======================================================================== To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
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