From:

http://www.bostonherald.com/news/columnists/carr05192000.htm

Patches' stance on tort reform may soon shift

by Howie Carr Friday, May 19, 2000

Pity poor Patches Kennedy.  Always the runt of the litter, never the
sharpest knife in the drawer, now the Boy Congressman from Rhode Island
is really confused.

He thought these people were his friends.

And after all he's done for them.

I mean, if a Kennedy, a member of the House Democratic leadership, can't
rely on rapacious tort lawyers and women of color to do the right thing,
well, what exactly is this world coming to?

It appears now that Patches Kennedy is going to be sued, just because he
pushed somebody.

But now she's looking for .  .  .  six figures.  Say, $210,000.  I throw
that number out because it's easy to divide into thirds - $140,000 for
Granny and $70,000 for her attorney, mouthpiece Mallory.

Oh, the multiple ironies in this Patches Kennedy hate crime, which is
exactly what this would be called if a Republican congressman had
attacked a woman, and not just any woman, either.

The victim is an African-American woman.  An elderly (well, 58)
African-American woman.  That's three protected classes - it's a triple
hate crime.

Oh yeah, and after 11 years on the job at LAX, Della is making only
$9.64 an hour.  That makes her poor, and now Patches is angrier than
ever.

He voted for the increase in the minimum wage, gosh darn it.  Where's
the gratitude?

``I've said I'm sorry for the last time,'' he says, sounding like Dick
Armey.  ``Enough is enough, and I'm not going to become a human ATM
machine.'' Well, Patches, now perhaps you can understand how taxpayers
feel about you and your Dad using us as an ATM for all your crackpot
schemes to expand the non-working classes.

As soon as he finished battering Granny, Patches went straight to the
Clinton playbook.  First he denied everything.  Then, when he found out
there was videotape, he apologized.  Now he's surly.  Why can't we all
just get along?

How great is it that Patches was busted as he returned from a
fund-raiser for the House Democratic leadership?  He and Gephardt and
Rangel and the rest of these pandering pols have been running around the
country, shaking down, among others, trial lawyers, by promising to
fight off all Republican risky schemes, most especially including any
attempt to enact tort reform.

Those evil Republicans - they want to reduce the number of frivolous
lawsuits.  How dare they, Patches would thunder - well squeak, anyway.

Now Patches is about to be the defendant in a frivolous lawsuit.  What
goes around, comes around.  Is there no honor among thieves?

Clint Eastwood was in D.C.  yesterday, testifying before Congress about
the lucrative new racket that Patches' fat cat lawyer pals have
developed, suing small businesses for exorbitant sums under the
Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA).  Do you think Patches listened to
Dirty Harry's arguments a little less dismissively after his brush with
the ambulance-chaser bar?

Patches' hate crime at LAX is even affecting his bloated Papa.  If Jack
E.  Robinson III can limp over the 10,000-signature requirement, Teddy
will not be able to challenge enough of them to knock him off the
ballot.  One attack on a black person could be an aberration.  Twice, it
becomes what the feds call a pattern.  The RICO statute kicks in.

Still, despite Patches' crash course in reality, I still don't think he
gets it.  Why else would he insist on releasing the LAX surveillance
video?
First of all, his ``carry-on'' was larger than the state he represents
in Congress.  Not a good way to win sympathy with the American flying
public.

Secondly, he shoves the woman but somehow believes he comes across
well.  Doesn't he have any clue about the jury pool he's trying to
taint?  If this goes to trial, they'll be drawing jurors from the same
population that acquitted O.J.  Simpson.

Don't settle, Patches, demand a jury trial in South Central L.A.  As
your new ally Clint Eastwood would say, `Do you feel lucky, punk?' Go
ahead, Patches, make her day.



=================================================================
             Kadosh, Kadosh, Kadosh, YHVH, TZEVAOT

  FROM THE DESK OF:                    <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
                      *Mike Spitzer*     <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
                         ~~~~~~~~          <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>

   The Best Way To Destroy Enemies Is To Change Them To Friends
       Shalom, A Salaam Aleikum, and to all, A Good Day.
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