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Break up the monotony of waiting on the results
of the election!!!
SMILE!!
:-) ......even LAUGH!!!
A dose of humor never hurt
anyone....
>>>>> > HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF
INSANITY
> > 1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a > hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. > > 2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice. >
> 3) Insist that your email address is: > Xena Warrior Princess <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Elvis-the-King > <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]> or <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>. >
> 4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries > with that. >
> 5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair > dancing. >
> 6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN - BASKET." >
> 7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers. >
> 8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten > over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. >
> 9) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favors.' >
> 10 Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think." >
> 11) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy." >
> 12) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights > up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way. >
> 13) Dont use any punctuation >
> 14) As often as possible, skip rather than walk. >
> 15) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer. >
> 16) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." >
> 17) Sing along at the opera. >
> 18) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme. >
> 19) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. > Wear them one day > >>after your boss does. (This is especially > effective if your boss is of the opposite gender.) >
> 20) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. > For example, "If anyone needs me, I'll
be in the bathroom, in Stall #3."
> > 21) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle > sounds all day. >
> 22) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party > because you're not in > >> the mood. >
> 23) Call 911 and ask if 911 is for emergencies. >
> 24) Call the psychic hotline and don't say anything. >
> 25) Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard. >
> 26) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" "3rd > time this week!!!" >
> 27) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling > "Run for your lives, they're loose!" >
> 28) Tell your boss, "It's not the voices in my head that bother me, its > the voices in your head that do." >
> 29) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to > have to let one of you go." >
> 30) Every time you see a broom, yell "Honey, your mother is here!" >
> And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.... >
> 31) Send this email to everyone in your address book, even if they sent > it to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this. > > <<< ======================================================
Remember Chester!
***Lock up antifreeze and any automotive products containing ethelyne glycol and make sure your vehicles are not leaking antifreeze or refrigerants, regardless of the time of year. Less than 1/2 a teaspoon is lethal to a 7 lb. cat.**** ./
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