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}}}>Begin As the Smoke Clears in Israel: A Radical Solution to a Radical Problem By J.J. Johnson Published 04. 4. 02 at 22:15 Sierra Time xxx Dear Israeli Citizen, It’s us again. Those Real Americans who warned you that the American government would sell you out in a Texas Minute. There is a global sigh of relief that full scale World War III has been averted (for now), and as the troops are pulling back, everyone’s being told to play nice in sandbox. Since you know not to take your hands off those triggers yet, you now understand you have a serious problem. Just as you probably didn’t like our last suggestions, you probably won’t like the following too well either, but we think we may have the ultimate solution to this problem in the Middle East. I am not a political idealist. I am not a theorist. I am a realist. This means I seek solutions not of what should be, or what I wish it to be, but what would actually work. What will be proposed here won’t be too popular among you, or for that matter many Americans. Sometimes the truth hurts, but since the world is apparently against you, there seems to be only two choices left: start a nuclear war or….well, keep reading. First, let’s look at the big picture. I’m not talking about that big picture that starts with King David, etc. Actually, I lose interest in the whole debate as soon as the date 70 AD comes up (as many have sought to lament us about). We’ve got Bibles here; read the stories, yeah – we get the drift. The big picture in this case is that due to Jews getting kicked out of virtually every country they’ve resided (so they tell me), Israel was created as a safe haven for Jews so that evils such as the Holocaust never happen again. Now, let’s be honest: Do you feel safe in Israel right now? You know as well as the rest of us that it will only be a matter of time before those folks strap on explosives or something worse and continue their campaign against you. Sure, you could fight back, as well you should. But the strategy at work to destroy Israel is repeatedly proven to work. As everyone sits down to talk ‘peace’, many of you are already checking the real-estate market, wondering how much you can get for your property, and checking El Al Airlines for tickets prices to a safer place. No, you aren’t being traitorous to your faith or to your people. You’re thinking about what kind of society your children will be raised in. Many of you just don’t trust your safety there anymore. You’re being a ‘realist’. You thought you had the Great Protector over your land. That may be God, but certainly not the United States of America. Let me explain. I wasn’t around then, but maybe it was a noble idea in the beginning - to give you folks a piece of dirt in the middle of the desert. You fought well to protect it. But this thing called ‘oil’ happened. Rather than Israel and the West taking control of those lands, we all somehow felt it was more noble to allow the natives (your enemies) profit from it. As the world became more dependent on crude oil, your safety and security became somehow less important as time went on. Sure, we could simply have pumped more here, and even made technological advances to become less dependent on oil. But our energy policy became ‘political’, and still is today. Hence, your adversaries are now rich, powerful, and hell bent on your destruction. As we stated before, your biggest problem has been and is still the government of the United States. Each time you were well on your way to vanquishing this problem that has been plaguing the earth, the need to ‘maintain’ good relations with your enemies (to keep that oil flowing) takes precedence, and you are stalled once again. Take a look at a map of the area around you. That 9-mile strip really scares you, doesn’t it? But just think of how much area around you would be controlled by Israel if some American President didn’t keep making a phone call ordering you to cease- fire. (The Sinai, the West Bank, Gaza, all of Lebanon, etc.) Actually, when I saw one Andrew Shapiro, a Jewish kid from Brooklyn, having breakfast with Yasser Arafat, I pretty much knew your goose was cooked. This guy is considered a 'dual citizen' - partly of your country. As a nation, you’re done – unless God steps in directly. If He doesn’t, let’s look down the road: The recent political actions have proven that sending suicide bombers against innocent Jews (and even Arabs) works. If (read when) you respond, the left-wingers (including some of your own people) complain to America and – you know the drill. Now you’ll never take the West Bank, and you know that when they want more of what you have left, they’ll just send more disposable soldiers your way. Your enemy has solidified a base camp right in your back yard. No matter what kind of so-called ‘peace treaty’ your government and your adversary come up with, will you ever trust those folks again? Given the rate of technological advancement, it is only a matter of time (perhaps this generation) until they acquire weapons of mass destruction. You know they will attempt to use them against you. You’ll have virtually no time to defend yourselves, and only the remote chance to react. Your enemy also has a higher birth rate, so there is also that ‘war of attrition’ you’ll have to deal with as well. They will eventually push you into the sea, and I regret that we may not be around to help you. Here’s a solution that may work best for everyone: Leave. That’s right, we’ve got plenty of room here. And even though some of you think that Anti-Semitism runs rampent here, you’re probably safer here than anywhere else on earth. Here’s more: Many of your surrogate organizations here have unfairly labeled people here as Anti-Semitic, right-wing, antigovernment extremists, but during your latest incursion, those same labeled folks were the only ones rooting for you. Frankly, I think the United States could benefit from having you here. How about New Mexico? Arizona? Plenty of room there, and since you folks seem to take defending a national border a lot more seriously than our government, there would be plenty for you to do there. Don’t worry about any disputes about whose land it is. Since you were trying to do what we did in these areas a long time ago, those who could hold a claim to the land have long been relegated to small reservations. And as Americans, you can travel the 50 states once you settle in – you'll find plenty of elbow room. No dual citizenship (you’ll be Americans), no more need for a big political lobby, we save a lot of money, and political capital, and your children (and ours) get to grow up in a much safer environment. Perhaps your folks can come over here and help us pump domestic oil? We have what is known as a ‘brain drain’ here anyway, with many intelligent people leaving. You could help balance that, and we can sure use some more folks here who believe in the right to keep and bear arms. Yes, I’m being selfish. I figure we can offer the Muslims in the Middle East the ultimate peace deal: We take all Israeli citizens into the U.S, the land becomes Palestine (or whatever they want to call it), and they remove the 300,000 illegal middle- easterners hidden somewhere in this country waiting for orders to meet Allah with thousands of infidels in tow. You see, we hear they are here because of our relationship with you over there. This should make everyone happy; with a clause in the treaty that one more act of aggression against the US that causes massive loss of life after you are relocated here will guarantee the destruction of major metropolitan areas in the Middle East. Much easier to back up that statement if we don’t have to worry about you being in the crossfire. As for the land that you love and built from a dry desert: don’t worry. If it’s meant to be yours someday, it will be. You can trust that once they take it all back, it won’t be the same. They'll go back to fighting each other– possibly with weapons of mass destruction, – which is just fine by us. But right now (and please don’t call us Anti-Semitic for saying this): Keeping your butts in that kill-zone known as the Middle East just isn’t worth World War III, or an army of suicide bombers on our own soil. If living in the “Holy land” means your people and ours are targeted by these freaks, then obviously, it isn’t that holy. Hey, it was a nice idea but as they say…. Who knew? Think about it. But while you’re pondering the idea, I should tell you that the press over here about what you’re doing isn’t looking good right now. Don’t blame me - you know who owns much of the press here. Yeah, we're getting the anti-Semitic hate mail, too. Yes, I know this idea will be considered ‘unthinkable’ and even cowardly. But heck, this country has been populated by folks from overseas – and we know many of you came from here anyway. You can still have Saturday’s off. We always had a problem staffing people on Sundays and Christmas anyway. A good part of New York, Los Angeles, and South Florida already celebrate your holidays. Unlike some other folks migrating here these days, you folks probably won’t have a problem with speaking English. Plenty of beach, and I’ll bet our CIA guys could learn a thing or two from your guys. Throughout history, radical problems have sometimes been solved by radical ideas. This idea is just that – pretty radical. This is called ‘thinking outside of the box’, or more importantly, thinking past the next election, and hopefully preventing the next war. This ‘crazy’ proposal will sound less crazy and may become more popular with every suicide bomber taking action. Think about it. © Permission to reprint/republish granted, as long as you include the name of our site, the author, and our URL. www.SierraTimes.com All Sierra Times news reports, and all editorials are © 2002 SierraTimes.com (unless otherwise noted) SierraTimes.com™ A Subsidiary of J.J. 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