Andreas Tille wrote:
> I'd like to propose the following text from the Debian Med team for
> the Stretch release notes:
>
>
> <title>News from Debian Med Blend</title>
>
> <para>Besides several new packages and updates for software targeting
There might be a better alternative to "Besides" here, but if so I'm
not sure what it is.
> life sciences and medicine the Debian Med team has again put a focus on
^
Maybe a comma after "medicine".
> the quality of the provided packages. In a GSoC project and an
> Outreachy project two students worked hard to add Continuous Integration
^
Maybe a comma after "project", and just possibly make it "In one GSoC
and one Outreachy project".
> support to the packages with the highest usage statistics due to
s/due/according/, or just say "the highest popularity-contest usage
statistics".
> popularity contest. The latest Debian Med sprint in Bukarest was also
> targeting at testing packages.
s/Bukarest/Bucharest/ (if we aren't using "București").
s/was also targeting/also targeted/, but we've already used this verb,
so switch to "concentrated on".
s/testing packages/package testing/ (assuming it means software QA as
opposed to packages in Debian testing, or indeed medical testing).
> </para><para>
> To install packages maintained by the Debian Med team install the
^
Probably a comma after "team".
> metapackages named med-* which are at version 3.0.1 for Debian Stretch
^
Definitely needs a comma before "which" (to make it a description
rather than a definition), and definitely a full stop after "Stretch"!
Also, we're standardising on lowercase releasenames: "stretch".
> Feel free to visit the
> <ulink url="http://blends.debian.org/med/tasks";>Debian Med tasks
> pages</ulink>
> to see the full range of biological and medical software inside Debian.
> </para>
s/inside/in/, but this feels like a weak ending... slightly better
would be "available in".
So my revised version:
<title>News from Debian Med Blend</title>
<para>Besides several new packages and updates for software targeting
life sciences and medicine, the Debian Med team has again put a focus on
the quality of the provided packages. In a GSoC project and an
Outreachy project, two students worked hard to add Continuous Integration
support to the packages with the highest popularity-contest usage
statistics. The latest Debian Med sprint in Bucharest also
concentrated on package testing.
</para><para>
To install packages maintained by the Debian Med team, install the
metapackages named med-*, which are at version 3.0.1 for Debian stretch.
Feel free to visit the
<ulink url="http://blends.debian.org/med/tasks";>Debian Med tasks
pages</ulink>
to see the full range of biological and medical software available in
Debian.
</para>
--
JBR with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
