[
https://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DERBY-2390?page=com.atlassian.jira.plugin.system.issuetabpanels:comment-tabpanel#action_12498750
]
Kim Haase commented on DERBY-2390:
----------------------------------
This is a terrific job, Laura -- I think you've done a great job merging the
manuals. These comments are on the individual sections. I don't think these
answer every question you had, though. Let me see -- question 5 -- I think it
would be good to update the output to 10.3 if possible, but getting the svn
version right is probably not possible since code hasn't frozen. Question 7 --
I believe both "mode" and "environment" are used but in slightly different
situations -- it might be worth adding the mention of "mode" to the Terminology
section? I think "configuration" is used only in "Deployment options" -- not
sure.
Introduction to Derby
Nice synthesis.
Last sentence -- you might reverse the order of "system requirements and
deployment options" to make it the same order as the sections that follow.
Deployment options
Here, probably, is where "Network Server" needs to be defined. But even the
Admin Guide doesn't seem to define it exactly. It talks about what it *does*
but doesn't say what it *is*. I don't know the answer to that question.
System requirements
I think for 10.3 the JDK version is 1.4 or higher? Maybe you were figuring on
dealing with this stuff later.
Product documentation for Derby
Glad you changed this from "library" -- that's a confusing term in software!
Getting Started introduces dblook as well as sysinfo and ij, I think -- at
least briefly?
The last paragraph mentions "Version 10.2" -- is that from one of the conrefs
that need to be changed for the next release?
Installing Derby
I like the reordering here.
Setting up your environment
In step 2, the common usage is "Set the environment variables", not "Set up".
Choosing a method to run the Derby tools and startup utilities
A table works really well here!
First row, middle column: second sentence repeats content of first column so
may be removable.
Third row, first column: should be "the java command", I think.
Third column: in both the second and third rows, the last paragraph is in
bigger type than the other(s) in the PDF. Any idea why? I see this happens in
other tables; it may just be a quirk of the DITA tools...
Also, in the third row, shouldn't CLASSPATH be included in the list of
environment variables to set?
Syntax for the derbyrun.jar file
I'm wondering if this section shouldn't come after the next one (Setting the
environment variables). The information is less basic.
Also, I think the first sentence should be more general because we're not
talking just about the CLASSPATH here. Maybe "If you use the derbyrun.jar file,
you do not need to remember which jar file to use for a particular purpose (as
described in Libraries provided by Derby)."
Setting the environment variables
Second sentence: The common usage is that you set an environment variable, not
set it up.
Step 1: I wonder why DERBY_10 is in code font in the second occurrence in the
sentence but not in the first?
Step 2: Is there some reason why one command looks in the bin directory and the
other just in the main DERBY_HOME directory? It is less distracting if they are
the same.
Step 3: I think you need a "the" in the Windows entry ("add the JAVA_HOME
environment variable").
Also you might use a more recent version of the 1.4.2 SDK -- the current
version is j2sdk1.4.2_14. (By default it installs as j2sdk, not j2se.) Or even
(gasp!) 1.5, the current version of which is jdk1.5.0_11. (They changed the
naming convention for 1.5.) We previously used the version one up from the
minimum -- we might continue that. Not necessary if it's too much work.
The Note here is a bit confusing. The thing is, if you have a Java executable
in your path, that almost invariably means that you have set JAVA_HOME
previously (and then set your PATH to include $JAVA_HOME/bin). So the note is
in effect saying, "If you have already set JAVA_HOME, you don't need to set
JAVA_HOME", which pretty much goes without saying. People who have JAVA_HOME
set will know that and will skip the step anyway. So you could remove the note,
I think.
Possibly what really needs to be here is something about adding $JAVA_HOME/bin
to your PATH and using java -version to verify that it's set correctly. (See
discussion later about "Verifying the Derby system configuration".)
Step 4: In the sentence about the control panel, there should not be a
semicolon after "bin".
Step 5: I don't think you need the second "the" (before JAVA_HOME).
I think in the Note "very" should be "verify"?
In the second paragraph after that, "follow" should be "following".
Using the Derby tools and startup utilities
I think it is not quite accurate to say that "These scripts also help you set
up your CLASSPATH environment variable." The scripts that start the Derby tools
set the CLASSPATH variable while they are being run, but they don't leave it
set. It would be better to leave out the sentence, I think.
There are additional scripts in the bin directory that can be used to set the
classpath (setEmbeddedCP, etc.). I think they all work fine if DERBY_HOME is
set. I don't know if they need to be mentioned at this point.
Running sysinfo, etc.
I notice the language on running the commands is not exactly parallel in all
three sections (sysinfo, ij, dblook) -- you might look closely at these and
sync them up.
I notice the first sentence in the second table row about sysinfo actually
mentions dblook -- cut/paste error apparently.
I'm glad you added dblook to this -- it was missing before, for some reason.
There is a bullet under "Running sysinfo", after "To run the sysinfo script" --
but there is only one bullet item, so maybe the two sentences should be merged
into "Choose the method for running the sysinfo script that you want to use",
or something like that. Similarly, there is a "1." in front of a sentence under
dblook, but this is the only item in the numbered list -- so it should probably
be a plain paragraph, similar to whatever you use for sysinfo. (With ij there
are actually three bullet items so there is no problem there.)
In the sentence above that there is a minor parallel-structure glitch -- should
be either
"to either a console or a file"
or
"either to a console or to a file"
Manually setting the CLASSPATH environment variable
See what Stan says about this, but we might want to de-emphasize these scripts.
Using derbyrun.jar simplifies matters considerably -- not only do you not need
to figure out which classpath script to run, you don't need to set the
classpath at all.
Verifying the Derby system configuration
Another JDK 1.3 mention.
Hm, there's a mention of using java -version back under System Requirements,
but that was before all the info about setting JAVA_HOME -- I wondered about
that. But I think most of the material in this current section is redundant at
this point? The "echo DERBY_HOME" material is under "Setting the environment
variables". In order for "java -version" to work, $JAVA_HOME/bin has to be in
your PATH, just as $DERBY_HOME/bin has to be in your path in order for the
standalone commands to work. So maybe that should be in the earlier section
about setting environment variables.
You do have at least one xref to this section that would need changing...
Self-study tutorial for users new to Derby
Under "Tutorial skills and software requirements," you might want to change
"run" to "use" in the second sentence. (You run commands, but you don't run
syntax.)
Another JDK 1.3 mention (and Derby 10.2).
Under "Problems and feedback on the tutorial activities" maybe "even more
useful" should be changed to "more useful" -- seems a bit presumptuous
otherwise. I missed this one before.
Activity 1
The way you reorganized this is excellent.
Creating a directory and copying scripts into the directory
Step 1: I would suggest that you should NOT change to the directory where you
installed Derby. It's not a great idea to add stuff to a Derby installation.
The DERBYTUTOR directory should be in your home directory or some other place
where you do your work.
Step 4: Period missing after second sentence.
Remove the sentence "In the following examples, substitute the correct path for
the DERBY_HOME variable:". In fact, if you have the DERBY_HOME variable set,
you can use exactly the commands shown, and it saves typing. (No need to put
DERBY_HOME in italics.)
Also, at the end of this step I would recommend adding the "Important" note
from Step 1 of Activity 3, since it applies here as well.
Creating a Derby database and running SQL statements
Step 7a: Missing period at end.
Activity 2: Run SQL using the client driver
Step 2: We should use derbyrun.jar here, I think. Replace
derbynet.jar start
with
derbyrun.jar server start
Step 4: "java" could be in code font in the third sentence.
Step 11: Replace
derbynet.jar shutdown
with
derbyrun.jar server shutdown
Activity 4
Steps 2 and 4 -- replace derbynet.jar with derbyrun.jar as in Activity 2.
Step 3: I think you can replace derbyclient.jar with derbyrun.jar -- but check
with Stan on this.
For the Activity notes at the end, you might want to check with Rick Hillegas
to see if this needs any updating to reflect the security changes for this
release.
Database connection URL
There's some inconsistency in how the syntax is specified -- server and port
are in angle brackets, but databaseName and URLAttributes are in italics. Since
they are all meant to be replaceable items, they should all be in the same
format (italics, I think) -- unless there's something I'm not understanding.
Typographical conventions
Were we going to try to update these so that people would use the correct
conventions going forward? You have used our proposed doc conventions for this
book, at least. Or is this an item for later when we have time to actually make
corresponding changes to the other docs? (Maybe we could update one item at a
time, say starting with fixed width for file and directory names.)
Libraries provided by Derby
First sentence: I think "their functions" would be more correct.
The format of this table seems confusing but I am not sure how to fix it; maybe
it needs to be a 3-column table, "Library", "Library file name(s)", "Use"?
Libraries not provided by Derby
Looks like this can be cut now, since it relates to JDK 1.3.
Scripts included with Derby
The sentence introducing the list should be changed from
The complete list of scripts that are included with Derby are:
to
The complete list of scripts that are included with Derby is:
> DOCS - Merge Working with Derby and Getting Started Guide
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> Key: DERBY-2390
> URL: https://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DERBY-2390
> Project: Derby
> Issue Type: Improvement
> Components: Documentation
> Reporter: Laura Stewart
> Assigned To: Laura Stewart
> Fix For: 10.3.0.0
>
> Attachments: cgsintro.html, getstartderby.pdf, rgsdocs17307.html
>
>
> The activities in the Working with Derby guide should be merged into the
> Getting Started Guide.
> Review Getting Started Guide for any reference info that should be either
> "shared" with another guide
> or moved to another guide. For example, the SQL Syntax section in the Getting
> Started Guide should
> be moved to the Reference Manual.
--
This message is automatically generated by JIRA.
-
You can reply to this email to add a comment to the issue online.
