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> Note: For those that don't know, "The Sled" is the
> SR-71 Blackbird spy plane from the 1960's and still
> the fastest airplane.
> In his book, "Sled Driver", SR-71 Blackbird pilot
> Brian Shul writes: "I'll always remember a certain
> radio exchange that occurred one day as Walt (my
> back-seater) and I were screaming across Southern
> California 13 miles high. We were monitoring various
> radio transmissions from other aircraft as we
> entered Los Angeles airspace. Though they didn't
> really control us, they did monitor our movement
> across their scope.
> I heard a Cessna ask for a readout of its ground
> speed."90 knots" Center replied. Moments later, a
> Twin Beech required the same. "120 knots," Center
> answered. We weren't the only ones proud of our
> ground speed that day as almost instantly an F-18
> smugly transmitted, "Ah, Center, Dusty 52 requests
> ground speed readout." There was a slight pause,
> then the response, "525 knots on the ground, Dusty."
> Another silent pause. As I was thinking to myself
> how ripe a situation this was, I heard a familiar
> click of a radio transmission coming from my
> back-seater. It was at that precise moment I
> realized Walt and I had become a real crew, for we
> were both thinking in unison. "Center, Aspen 20, you
> got a ground speed readout for us?" There was a
> longer than normal pause.... "Aspen , I show 1,742
> knots" (That's about 2004.658 mph for those who
> don't know) No further inquiries were heard on that
> frequency.
> --------------------------------------------------
> In another famous SR-71 story, Los Angeles Center
> reported receiving a request for clearance to FL 600
> (60,000ft). The incredulous controller, with some
> disdain in his voice, asked, "How do you plan to get
> up to 60,000 feet?
> The pilot (obviously a sled driver), responded, "We
> don't plan to go up to it; we plan to go down to
> it." He was cleared.
> ----------------------
> The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a
> .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument
> panel, and then asked the navigator, "Do you know
> what I use this for?"
> The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"
> The pilot rsponded, "I use this on navigators who
> get me lost!"
> The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place
> it on his chart table.
> The pilot asked, "What's that for?" "To be honest
> sir," the navigator
> replied, "I'll know we're lost before you will."
> --------------------------------------------
> When Hillary Clinton visited Iraq last month the
> Army Blackhawk helicopter used to transport the
> Senator was given the call sign "broomstick one".
> And they say the Army has no sense of humor!
>
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>
> Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6
> miles!" Delta 351:"Give us another hint! We have
> digital watches!"
>
--------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the
> tower to hold short of the runway while a MD80
> landed. The MD80 landed, rolled out, turned around,
> and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted
> comedian in the MD80 crew got on the radio and said,
> "What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by
> yourself?"
> Our hero the Cherokee pilot, not about to let the
> insult go by, came back with: "I made it out of MD80
> parts. Another landing like that and I'll have
> enough parts for another one."
> --------------------------------------------------
> There's a story about the military pilot calling for
> a priority landing
> because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a
> bit peaked." Air
> Traffic Control told the fighter jock that he was
> number two behind a B-52 that had one engine shut
> down.
> "Ah," the pilot remarked, "the dreaded seven-engine
> approach."
> ----------------------------------------------
> A student became lost during a solo cross-country
> flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on
> radar, ATC asked, "What was your last known
> position?"
> Student: "When I was number one for takeoff."
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> Taxiing down the tarmac, the 757 abruptly stopped,
> turned around and returned to the gate. After an
> hour-long wait, it finally took off.
> A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant,
> "What was the problem?"
> "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the
> engine," explained the flight attendant," and it
> took us a while to find a new pilot."
> --------------------------------------------------
> "Flight 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45
> degrees."
> "But Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise
> can we make up here?"
> "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when
> it hits a 727?
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