*Some humor in sign ads
*
Advertisement In A Long Island Shop: Guitar, for sale....... Cheap.......
....no strings attached .

Ad.. In Hospital Waiting Room: Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At
A Time!

Seen on a bulletin board: Success Is Relative.  More The Success, More The
Relatives.

When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...I Gave Up Reading.

My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses... He Drinks
Straight Out Of The Bottle.

You Know Your kids Have Grown Up When: Your Daughter Begins To Put On
Lipstick.. Or Your Son Starts To Wipe It Off .

Sign In A Bar: "Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In
Advance."

Sign In Driving School: If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In
Her Way.

Behind Every Great Man, There Is A Surprised Woman.

The Reason Men Lie Is Because Women Ask So Many Questions.

Getting Caught Is The Mother Of Invention.

Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Snore And You sleep Alone.

The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe Is
The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.

Sign At A Barber's Saloon In Detroit: We Need Your Heads To Run Our
Business.

A Traffic Slogan: Don't Let Your Kids Drive If They  are Not Old Enough Or
Else They Will Never Be.

Sign In A Restaurant: All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been
Personally Passed By The Manager.

Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window: Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out
>From Here. She May Be Your Grandmother !

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