Joe,
Even tough "death" is not the right word for it but rather
"dropping the body" or "moving own" whatever term we use
the pain and hurt is still there and it only brings little 
consolation.

The best thing, imo, is to find supporting friends 
or even professional "good listener"
and talk and talk about it  :) and talk and ...



--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "rudra_joe" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> 
wrote:
> Yesterday commemorated my father death. I was there at North 
Hollywood High Schoool jogging the track with him. Then we were 
climbing the fence to return home when he fell off. He died pretty 
quickly. To me, looking in his eyes he was just gone. And then in the 
coming weeks it felt like he had never been. He was erased from my 
mental sphere as far as presence.  I therefore have this one nagging 
doubt in my mind about all our hocus pocus called religious 
experience that if I could figure out I would have faith but without 
it which leaves me bereft of true hope in all man's concocted 
thought, and that doubt is this, will I die, and when I die will I 
die completely like it seems my father did. 
> 
> ...(Of course his memory lives on in me and perhaps his genes. He 
was a chef/restauranteur and I had never figured I would do that when 
I was going to law school but when I flunked out it was the only 
thing to do.)...





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