--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "Premanand Paul Mason" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > It's interesting to see that recently posters have used the > suggestion that someone might be angry as a way of attempting to > disgrace or belittle them. > It is spiritual fascism to come on like this. > Oh I should add,, IMHO
Yes, it can be a bit of a show stopper. And if someone perceives anger in another, it takes only a modest amount of maturity to recognize that that is their own impression, and other "explanations" may be in play. Unless its a quite visible anger, viewed in-person, for example a breaking dishes and shouting -- without rational basis -- type of anger, Then its beyond hypothesis. Regardless, for either type, it becomes pretty clear with life experiences, that people who are "suffering" anger (and I mean it in a similar way as "suffering a disease" -- are NOT doing it "on purpose", something tiggers it and it unfolds. No decision to do so is involved. Another insight I found unfolding in my teens, in having to deal with "angry people" -- as well as my own teen "anger" I found flaring up in myself -- is that a good way of dealing with persons in the throws of anger is NOT to react to them and the content of their anger. They are looking for something, anything, to get pissed off at, to vent the volcano of rage surging up in them. Confronting them, "you are angry" or engaging them on their level "I am NOT a stuid asshole!" are not productive. Its just throwing oil on the fire. Absorbing what ever they say, "sucking it up", letting their mud settle in your "ocean" is a means to difuse the situation. Often almost instantly. These are the life-lessons I learned as a teen. Thats why I find it surprising that a trained and licensed therapist acts in ways that seem devoid of any awareness of such simple andbasic insights. that is: i) confronts in absolutist terms, "you are angry", ii) does not recognize any other possibilities (even though the diagnosis is on-line for a person they have never met and know virtualy nothing about), iii) and directly engages with the person they feel is angry (instead of the "absorbson difussion" appraoch I know usually diffusses things quickly). It beomes, IMO, even funnier when the therapist misdiagnoses the anger, and yet stil directly engages with the phantom anger. Therapist: "You are angry. Absolutely without question." On-line Stranger: "No, thats not the case." Therapist: "Oh, yes you are. Don't give me that bullshit that you always do." On-line Stranger: Bullshit? Always give you? Therapist: "Don't give me of your passive-aggressive slams and bullshit. I won't stand for that, I won't STAND for THAT, I won't, I won't, I WON'T!!! You fucking asshole!" On-line Stranger: Um, ok. But maybe we could discuss the issue at hand. Therapist: "Bullshit! I absolutely refuse to discuss the issues with anyone who is so blatnatly insulting and passive-aggressively ANGRY. Such behaviors makes me SO MAD I could SCREAM. I refuse to interact with such people!" On-line Stranger: "Um, ok. Good luck with that." Therapist: "Shut up you fucking asshole!!" ------- I use mimicing and satire as a means to help diagnose such social dynamics. Its not to "hurt" the object of the satire, but to replay, to re-reflect "odd" behaviors in such a way that everyone can laugh. To provide an out "I get your point, put clearly I am not THAT bad. haha. " And taking real curcumstances and replaying them with a bit more edge, a bit more contrast, helps to isolate the key factors at play. Thats why I find it doubly odd that use of satire is critiziced as being a manifestation of latent anger (I think that is what Peter is say.). But its all grist for the mill of satire. Taken together, its all pretty funny, with lots of nice texture an duance. And lessons to chew on and absorb. > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, braaahmaan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > wrote: > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Peter <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > --- braaahmaan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > > > > Oh, yes. Sorry. I forgot to state the obvious > > > > prediction: you see rage > > > > and anger in my post. hahaha. What else is new? > > > > > > And what else is new in your denial! > > > > > > > Can you cite one post that pokes fun at you, or > > > > criticizes you, in > > > > which you don't, in YOUR EYES, see rage and anger in > > > > the poster? > > > > > > Absolutely. Someone who is straight forward in their > > > anger. You don't like what I say at times. Fine. But > > > instead of just stating that, you start on these > > > passive-aggressive satiric attack pieces that have > > > nothing to do with the topic under discussion. > > > > Ok. But that seems to have nothing to do with the current exchange. > > You appear to keep bringing up old business thats in your head and > > repeating it as if it has some contemporary relevance. > > > > Lets look at your current comments. > > > > > Absolutely. > > > Someone who is straight forward in their > > > anger. > > > > You know this to be true absoluetely? How? > > > > Your comments would be relevant in a conversation with someone who > is > > angry with you. Not someone who is pointing out some ironies with a > > chuckle. If anyone is angry here, it appears tht it may be you. Its > > like I have been walking on a nice clear day and you come up to me > and > > say why are you total wet? How to answer such? > > > > > You don't like what I say at times. > > > > I find somethings you say at times ironic and contradictory. As I do > > in myself, and others. That usually makes me laugh. Abd I may > disagree > > with some facts of yours or some logic. Which I do with myself (upon > > reviewz) and others. But this has nothing to do with "not liking" > you > > or what you say. Its not a personal thing. Its not an emtional thing > > (which "liking" refers to. Its an intellectual thing. An analytical > > thing. Do you see the distinction? > > > > > Fine. But instead of just stating that, you start on these > > > passive-aggressive satiric attack pieces > > > > I do use satire at times to bring some issue to light. It sems both > a > > gentler way and a more amusing way than dry analysis. > > > > That you find satire "passive-aggressive" is interesting. As asked > > before,do you find all satire as such? Or just what you find to be > > "bad satire"? Or just satire directed at you or your friends? > > > > That you find satire and "attack" in interesting to. Do you ever > laugh > > at yourself? Find your antics amusing? I find lots of folly in my > > life. I satirize myself. With great mirth. I recommend it. > > > > > that have > > > nothing to do with the topic under discussion. > > > > I am sorry that you are unable to find any relevance in my my > satiric > > pieces. Not being able to find relvance, brings you to an opinion > > "this has nothing to do with the discussion." Thats a opinion that I > > don't share. I find they have everything to do with the discussion. > > I can try to footnote what my satires are focussed on so yu can > follow > > along if that helps. > > > > Again, looking at the comment that started this exchange, whats not > > funny about someone proclaiming that Brahman is seing and writing > > through them, who then proceeds to tell every one off, "to go walk > the > > long plank or suck eggs". Mad TV or SNL, even in their better > moments, > > could not equal that. Sometimes satire is just THERE in life. > > Somethings are just funny. If you don't see the humor, you might > > consider "loosening up" a bit. > > > ------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor --------------------~--> Need Help? Get Help! 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