Sally, we have all felt this way at some point, where things don't make sense to us and we get hung up on what we missed or waited too long to do or couldn't afford to do. Because we can't all watch our furbabies every single moment, and because money is not an unlimited commodity, and because they're such good "hiders" when it comes to their illnesses, these things are *going* to happen. God knows I've lost a couple who might have lived longer if I had done something differently or noticed something sooner. Unfortunately, there's no cosmic law that what happens will be fair or make any sense at all. Know that Tiny loved you and had a good life with you and went without prolonged suffering. I know now you're unsure of your treatment of Junior, but it sounds like you're conscientious and there's lots of good advice on this list to guide you. Please don't drag yourself down with wondering, just do your homework and ask questions, questions, questions -- here and at the vet -- and, aside from providing good nutrition and supplements, take things as they come and try not to worry about what hasn't happened yet.
Oh, and about chat rooms, yes, they can be daunting but they can be enjoyed even if you're a slow typer. Just don't strike up conversations with everybody at once! ;-) May you have a better year ahead than the one just ended (and this goes to all of us). Diane R.