Well there's a few things that could do with some improvement. The interaction
between Naruto and Zel needs some refinement early on, but I'm not eloquent
enough to be able to explain how without basically doing it for you. The fact
Zel's blue should cause a little more reaction, this isn't England during the
era of the Roman Empire you don't see that many blue people running around.
The other thing is given Zel's manner of dress and that he usually does go into
towns in the Slayersverse with nary a comment him not being willing to at least
try to enter the village is stretching things. Especially if he just sits in
one area instead of continuing his quest to seperate a mixture of wine, juice,
and water back into their component parts.
I can't recall there ever being a Hammer of Justice in Slayers, usually it's
the Fists of Justice, Pacifist Fist, or Power of Justice in a speech. Fireball
practice in the middle of a forrest... even Lina considers that a big no-no.
Not to mention going from lighting to fireball without Flame arrow or
otherwise... Why not Wind Shamanism spells given the title? The Bram Fang
isn't as powerful although it has its uses, but given he's starting out
immediately handing out the really destructive stuff is like teaching Amelia
the Dragon Slave. Given Zel appeared to have broken the kunoichi's neck or
otherwise neutralized her and pwned her companions before the sudden scene
change with Naruto waking up that whole sequence just doesn't make a whole lot
of sense.
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