My "appreciation" of Ruth Bell Graham is the site lead at Beliefnet.com 
tonight. What a fascinating woman!What a life! 
 
I wrote this short esssay using my brand-new Word 2007 software, and don't 
know whether it will cause formatting problems for some of you. Let me know if 
so. If the glitches are too annoying, you can also read it on my website: 
 
_http://www.frederica.com/writings/ruth-bell-graham-an-appreciation.html_ 
(http://www.frederica.com/writings/ruth-bell-graham-an-appreciation.html) 
 
The third "episode" of my podcast will be broadcast tomorrow, and I'm still 
getting used to this kind of entity. I am realizing that what I'm missing is 
that there is no easy way to get feedback. So pls feel free to write me with 
any 
thoughts abt the podcasts that have already gone out, or any topics you 
recommend for the future. You can sign up here: 
_http://www.ancientfaithradio.com/podcasts/frederica/_ 
(http://www.ancientfaithradio.com/podcasts/frederica/) 
Just scroll down and you'll see iTunes and all the rest at the bottom. 
 
********
 
 
“If I marry Bill it must be with open eyes,” a 21-year-old Ruth Bell wrote 
in her diary. “After the joy of knowing that I am his by rights and his 
forever, I will slip into the background.”  
But a woman so bright and mischievous, and so profoundly committed to her 
faith, doesn’t disappear that easily. For over 63 years, Ruth was the wife of 
the 
world's most famous evangelist, and though she didn’t fight for the 
spotlight, she didn’t exactly disappear into mousy nonentity. In 2004 a 
collection of 
her poems, prayers, diary entries, and anecdotes was published under the title “
Footprints of a Pilgrim,” and it revealed a woman who was vital, charming, 
and who had her share of stubbornness. As she often told her children, "There 
comes a time to stop submitting and start outwitting."  
Stories about Ruth Bell Graham disclose both her unsubmitting and her 
outwitting, and whet the appetite to know better this 94-pound dynamo, mother 
of 
five, and poet. Once, for example, though well advanced in age, she tried to 
conceal from Bill that she had a broken arm; she didn't want him to find out 
she'd 
been hang gliding. Or there’s the story about the time, decades earlier, when 
LBJ asked her husband his advice about a running mate. His surprising response 
was "Ow!", because Ruth had kicked him under the table, a reminder of his 
promise that he’d stay away from giving political advice. Another tale depicts 
her motherly determination to teach a son not to oversleep: we’re given a 
glimpse of Ruth crawling across the roof with a cup of water gripped in her 
teeth, 
preparing to give the boy a good dousing.  
But such antics are only one side of her character; she was also a Christian 
who thought deeply and prayed hard. Ruth had a keen understanding of 
suffering. The first funeral Billy ever conducted was for a young boy, a 
situation that 
is difficult even for experienced pastors. Yet the poem Ruth wrote about that 
day, about dressing the boy for this final homecoming, is as clear, reserved, 
and poignant as Robert Frost's "'Out, Out--'."  
Another brief poem, from her dating years, included a neat turn reminiscent 
of the 17th-century poet George Herbert. At this time Ruth was resolved never 
to marry, and she intended to spend her life in Tibet as an "old-maid 
missionary." But that resolve was not always steady:  
Another date/ You held my hand/ and I,/ feeling a strange,/ sweet thrill,/ 
gave to my heart a sharp rebuke,/ and told it/ to be still./ You held me close/ 
and I gasped, "Oh, no!"/ Until/ I felt my heart within me rise/ and tell me/ 
to be still. 
Though evangelists’ empires can have a dauntingly corporate face, throughout 
six decades of marriage Ruth retained her own identity as a “Pilgrim,” one 
marked by diligence and delight. When the novelist Jan Karon visited the 
Grahams 
in their home, she came away with this memory of Ruth:  
"Here was this tiny, fragile, yet powerful woman coming toward me in her 
hallway in black tights, ballet slippers, and the most beautiful white blouse I 
think I have ever seen. I was swept off my feet by this woman. She had this 
enormous energy that preceded her down the hallway…And she was so naughty. She 
just teased [Billy] mercilessly…I thought they were the cutest, sexiest couple 
I 
had ever seen." 
We don’t see many examples of couples who made it through that many decades 
of marriage with all the lamps still blazing. Leave it to Ruth Bell Graham to 
show us, brilliantly, how it is done. 
 
********
Frederica Mathewes-Green
www.frederica.com



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