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F R E N D Z  of martian
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Deadly bread... :-)

martian


Surely this must be one of the Demons that have been tearing our
Families apart.  Stop this insidious agent of Satan from
destroying our
Great Country!!.  Write your Congressman and demand More Strict
Bread
Laws Now!!!..........Will Ivy

Important Warning for those who have been drawn
unsuspectingly into the
use of bread:

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons eat bread.

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in
bread-consuming households
score below average on standardized tests.

3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread
was baked in the home, the
average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant
mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women
died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid,
yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.

4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed
within 24 hours of eating bread.

5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has
been
proven that  as little as one pound of dough can be used
to
suffocate a mouse. The  average American eats more bread
than that in one month!

6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit
a low
incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease,
and osteoporosis.

7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects
deprived
of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread
after as
little as two days.

8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user
to "harder"  items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter,
and even cold cuts.

9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the
human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that
eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by
this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy,
gooey bread-pudding person.

10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.

11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees
Fahrenheit!  That kind of heat can kill an adult in less
than one minute.

12. Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to
distinguish between significant scientific fact and
meaningless
statistical babbling.




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Mailed to Martian <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> on 08/19/1999 at 08:44:29
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