SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE New year is about to come and no one become man enough to question matasanos retarded commentary on over the last year or so .. this include talk on retarded virtualization, good old humble hacker name dropping .. finger pointing and over all ridiculous security debate them carry out on poor unsuspecting people .. .. Let gobble and one decent English speaking friend explain to media about the whole story...
First there was Scut, Jimjones and Gobbles by far the very best ass kickers from 2001 to 2005. (Please not the exact time lines as Matasano retards love showing off there knowledge about the scene with rough time estimates and good old name dropping) This become evident with pointing Danny Dulia, Tim Newshman and Nergal in retarded blog. Before he stray, It was fun to watch everyone love these guys talking shots at security researcher who think listening to R&B music and security research go hand in hand. A classic example from 2003, was by Zen-parse aka Gregg McManus, now working in idefense. (matasano plz note respected security member name in diary. Gobble also advice to hang out on irc for better name throwing of mysterious hacker community like above). However Gobble also think that name throwing to public about old school hacker history dont allow rise in sales figures. Infact it make Dino leave to Investment banks in East USA for better money and overall well being in day to day life. Anyways, Zen parse do good job of shooting fat HD moor in his fat Achillis bitch tits about his dumb turkey like telnet AYT exploit discussions in public Now HD work hard, porting buffer overflow code from C to Perl and Perl to Ruby in metasploit. He do this to help hacker community from emerging country earn decent living. He lie in bed and wonder like Forest Gump, that one day, metasploit have all nice API feature of Core Impact, and Dave Aitels special CDE double free exploit. He beg lorian for 7350fun source as php_mime_slit() function confuse his straight thinking brain. It also cause hurt when he don't understand why memchr() function allow buffer overflow, but not always exploitable. However HD's first priority remain to reduce drastic weight after marriage first !!! Gobble suggestion: Hi HD, If one feels that he cant cope with the pressures of tracking lots of variables in C code function for buffer overflow analyses, one should hang on #c or eat some fruit. This is better than resigning to ones fate and copy core impact exploit code scavenged from limwire and emule!!! Gobble also give HD a small tip on code analysis .. don't just stare at C code if you don't understand. Paste complex code on #c once again under proxy name .. it allow quick relief and avoid brain damage of Texan breast face !! Now Gobble feel that being a matasano hate mail , oneself should not stray from point of focus and continue writing about main subject of this electronic e-mail's intention. As I feel strong feelings about matasano, I see Lot of people see there blog and get back onto doing better things like finishing OWASP executive summaries and recommendation tables for fun filled reports. This is because security consultants get paid for report writing, and not reading retarded blogs about security related pillow fights from matasano lemon boys .. Let gobble enlighten security community about various matasano profile .. It decide to start with Dave Gold smith .. the grumpy old idiot of matasano .. sorry dave, sad you make no money on @stake buyout .. His bio on matasano says the following Dave Goldsmith co-invented fire walking, Yes David, thanks for co-inventing fire walking, what else did you CO invent, oh yes you CO wrote the first i386 buffer overflow paper too eh ??? Oh wait a minute!!! Why not just CO SHUTUP for a change -- Gobble interruption in email -- Dave, he feel hiring portal- from security.is allow Matasano for better PR and give chance for original content that's not CO written. See Dave, portal write first format string paper, it known as "art.txt". This tactic allow better boasting of Matasano. Further, it increase drastic fan following level, in turn making Dave chuckle and cream his nappy at same time - Self Thanks for giving Dave good idea!!! Jeremy Rauch, F33r the B33r!! Jeremy come with "ORIGINAL" member dog tag of ISS ex-force. This is what he claim on matasano biographies. He become first hacker interior decorator and make ISS lab look cool with pet tarantula and DMZ LAN diagram. He co find bug in "Super" package in Debian and reproduce hidden SNMP community in HP OpenView ( Kidding Jeremy, we know you are the best ) Thanks to magnificent finding, Mark Dowd, Neel Mehta , Caddis take notice and get inspiration to join Jeremy's cute dream team. Sadly young members with bright mind make idiot Jeremy redundant. ISS then decide to rename ex-force to X force, sigh!!! Now Dinos turn. But hey … Gobble don't talk bad about Dino. They realize Dino know w00w00 and ADM member. Besides Dino have common friend ie junk yard warz hero, Danny Dulia … Gobble also convey warm hello from Dethy in Australia and Cold hello from teddi in Iceland to Dino for 0-day trickery on Mac. Gobble and all its fan thinks Dino is a smart man, who like working in ibanks, and earning good money at wealthy levels. Now gobble discuss the prized idiot of matasano: Thomas Attack !! Gobble love this retard. What he love even more is that massive head with sweat all over during black hat 2007. It remind gobble of distant cousin, the Dodo ..!! But Gobble turkey feel confused like a chicken hawk!!! It don't understand why Pattack feel so nervous over retarded talks with Juana Rustokava and her equally retarded viertualization talk ? Gobble solution to big fuss on virtualized root kit – Give Pattack a flying dizovi kick.. preferably on his big face. This create immense pain .. One more question from Gobble… he know very well that Thomas's mothers tongue is English, and this allow him to communicate well, but yet he get kicked out by DT in blackhat for not finishing silly talk in time .. Why ??? To Make Juana Rustokava get rid of her misery, support young polish girl to help conduct sex change operation. Gobble demand helpful penetration tester from emerging countries to donate monies for decent deeds toward our belovid sisters sex change operation. Gobble know this as it help sister Joana understand complex virtualization problem on retarded security concept, blown out of proportion by the size of super turkeys back side. Punt Punt !! -- Gobble interruption in email -- ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT Ok, this mail become too big to handle .. I go to holiday for thank givings now .. but he will be fucking back, and this time with a brilliant surprise. Everybody gets a Christmas present in form of cool blog .. this blog will shortly open to everybody .. every time the matasano retards comment or debate about security scene , a parallel post go on this blog .. Thomas, u fucking idiot .. better watch before you say something stupid else we shoot u down , with Dino flying kick special Regards, The Matasano hate machine (1,2,3,4,5) , brother Peter Shipley ! _______________________________________________ Full-Disclosure - We believe in it. Charter: http://lists.grok.org.uk/full-disclosure-charter.html Hosted and sponsored by Secunia - http://secunia.com/