IF MY BODY WERE A CAR...
 
 If my body were a car, this is the time I would be
 thinking about trading it in for a newer model. 
 I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish
 and my paint job is getting a little dull, but
 that's not the worst of it. 
 
 My headlights are out of focus and it's especially
 hard to see things up close. 
 
 My traction is not as graceful as it once was. 
 I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even
 in the best of weather. 
 
 My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. 
 
 It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. 
 
 My fuel burns inefficiently. 
 
 But here's the worst of it -- 
  
 Almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter...
 either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires! 


       
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