I read it..!! Thank you teacher...!!! On 1 March 2010 16:54, Aaditya ! <aaditya2...@yahoo.co.in> wrote:
> > > Nevertheless, I do agree and have noticed in the past myself that Aditya > B.'s comments, very often, are extremely insensitive and discouraging > especially to ppl who may be posting their early messages here on the list. > Intelligence, like all the virtues of the world, should be shown at the > right place and time. > > Regards, > Aditya > *if you can read THIS.... thank a teacher* > > > --- On *Mon, 3/1/10, Sanjay Lulla <sanjay_lulla2...@yahoo.com>* wrote: > > > From: Sanjay Lulla <sanjay_lulla2...@yahoo.com> > Subject: Re: g_b Strong protest Aditya let's not discuss individuals > > To: gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com > Date: Monday, March 1, 2010, 10:56 AM > > > > I strongly protest and dispute this > > "*We must remember and understand that we gays and people from the > so-called 3rd sex are psychologically not as strong as the male species per > se!! :) We 'guys' are of the sensitive type. Hope you will control your > emotional outbursts"* > > ** > > I do not agree wiht this generalisation. We are what we think we are. If I > feel/believe that I am squeamish lacking strenght and courage maybe I am all > of the above what Saurav akka Rohini says. This is sheer generalisation. > Strenght courage is not gender specific. > > Look at Aditya, he will know that someone or the other will pounce on him > but he does say things and none of what he says is wrong or incorrect. Maybe > he is blunt and too precise but as he is courageous enough to do so anyway, > should we say that as per Sauravs definition that Aditya is a straight in > the closet? Humbug Bladderdash. ......... ......... ..:p > > > little prince-Sanjay N Lulla > > > ------------------------------ > *From:* Saurav Kumar Das <sauravdas17@ yahoo.com> > *To:* gay_bom...@yahoogro ups.com > *Sent:* Sun, February 28, 2010 5:04:42 PM > *Subject:* g_b Aditya let's not discuss individuals > > > > Hi Aditya, > > Have been following your posts for sometime and feel strongly that by > discussing "Prashant" who is in Delhi and a member of this forum we are > unnecessarily getting into an individual's personal life. Maybe after > reading what you have posted below he may be psychologically traumatized. > > > > We must remember and understand that we gays and people from the so-called > 3rd sex are psychologically not as strong as the male species per se!! :) We > 'guys' are of the sensitive type. Hope you will control your emotional > outbursts. I am not saying however that you are wrong. > > > > All I am saying is let's not discuss individuals. > > > > Best wishes. > > > ------------------------------ > *From:* Manoj <zeus200...@yahoo. com> > *To:* gay_bom...@yahoogro ups.com > *Sent:* Sun, February 28, 2010 12:30:20 PM > *Subject:* Re: g_b post coming out problems > > > > > wow a veru nice response aditya ..... suddenly makes us realise why we like > u inspite of all the other bites :-D > --- On *Sat, 27/2/10, Aditya Bondyopadhyay <adit.b...@gmail. com>* wrote: > > > From: Aditya Bondyopadhyay <adit.b...@gmail. com> > Subject: Re: g_b post coming out problems > To: gay_bom...@yahoogro ups.com > Date: Saturday, 27 February, 2010, 11:33 AM > > > Dear Nish, > Every one's life is different, and every one's parents are different > charecters. If you had decided that your parents are people to whom you > could safely come out to, then that was the right decision for you. Do not > give that part of the issue another thought, irrespective of what your best > friend says. In any event, ultimately an honest life where nothing is hidden > and where you are being truthful to yourself and to others is the best life, > irrespective of the difficulties, sacrifices, and pain this involves. For if > you are truthful, then firstly you are not causing hurt to another by > deception, and secondly then no one can sneak up on you with unpleasant > surprises. Others may target you with prejudice when you are out, but that > is their folly, not yours. You will have preserved your own dignity as a > human being in your own eyes, and that will let you live life with your head > held high. > > You may have noticed on this list recently two people being discussed, > namely a person called Prashant and Profesor Siras of AMU. I am mentioning > them because they can be illustrative of how your life may turn out if you > do not stick to your commendable decision to not get married to a woman. > > Prashant, as per the story he has told about himself, is married, due to > social pressures most likely similar to the way your mom is now putting > presssure on you. And what is Prashant like today? He is a bitter, > disillusioned, hateful, prejudiced, and confused person. More than one > person has advised him to seek help from a competent psychiatrist. By his > own admission, his married life is not one of blissful companionship but of > bitterness and anger and pain all around. And his bitterness has affected > him to an extend where he cannot even see the fact that the very community > he claims to support and sacrifice his life for, namely LGBT, is severely > hurt by his public ravings and rantings, to an extent where he may even > jeopardise the most important fight the community is involved with, the 377 > battle in the Supreme Court. I want you to think if you would want that to > be your life 2 decades from now. > > Professor Siras was a closetted homosexual and the closest he came to being > out was via writing oblique and tangential poetry, where pining for the moon > was supposed to be understood as a desire by the poet for another man. When > I read one of his poems in translation, I read 'moon' not 'man'. And I read > nothing about him being out. But obviously, like life, truth always catches > up with you. So he was subjected to a sting operation by AMU and suspended. > Both his suspension and the sting are violations of his rights. They are > deplorable acts and need to be condemned. But just think, could the AMU have > done such a thing if Professor Siras had actually written 'man' instead of > 'moon'? Could the so called scandal have been a scandal in reality if there > had been nothing to hide? I think not. The naked man cannot be shamed. > Disrobing to dishonour can happen only when one is robed and therefore have > some things to hide. Blackmail can happen, only when someone can hold the > threat of disclosing a secret over your head. So ultimately, coming out and > being honest to yourself is probably one of the best decisions that you have > taken. You are because of this truthfulness a much stronger individual, much > less prone to hurt and injury. > > And finally, if your mom's pressure continues unabaited, and if at any > point you think you would fall for it, there is just one condition that you > should insist on as a non-negitiable with your mom. That condition is that > you would not wait till after you are married to disclose the fact of your > being gay to the girl that you are getting married to, but would do that > right at the very begining when the marriage is being negotiated. THat you > would explain to he girl everything that being gay means, and what you would > continue to do even if you are married. If after that full and complete > disclosure, the girl is still willing to get married to you, then you would > go ahead. > > I wish you all the best, > Aditya Bondyopadhyay > > On 27 February 2010 09:25, net.buddy6 <net.bud...@yahoo. > in<http://aa.mc533.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=net.bud...@yahoo.in> > > wrote: > >> >> Hello, >> >> This is the first time I am writing on this forum. Actually, I need help >> from you guys. >> >> I am 30 years old. I came out to my parents, sister and my best friend >> last year. Initially they were shocked. They took to me a psychiatrist. I >> went for 3-4 session, later I refused to go coz it was not serving any >> purpose. In last session, psychiatrist told my parents that I am normal and >> nothing wrong with me. >> >> I though everyone will come around with time however I was wrong. Everyone >> avoided talking on this topic and kept telling me to get married to a girl >> sooner or later. One week back, I was talking to Mom and tried to talk on >> this topic. She told me that it's ok to be gay but I have to get married coz >> I can't spend my whole life alone. According to her, I have spent 7-8 year >> for searching a partner but still I am single so there are very less chances >> that I will get a partner(guy) ever. My problem is that in a way she is >> telling truth. It's not easy to spend whole life alone. I stay alone, away >> from my parents and I don't really like to be alone. Every so often, I go >> into a phase where I get depressed. BUT, still I don't want to get married. >> I am going to meet her next week and I want to talk to her again. I don't >> want her to live in a false hope that one day I will get married to girl. I >> want to discuss with her that why it's not good for me to get married and >> choose a life of being alone rather than staying with a girl(wife) as >> friends. She claims that she knows one gay guy (I am sure she knows, must be >> one of relative) who is happily married to a women. She thinks that once I >> will start staying with a women and become father then I will get attached >> to my wife and child and everything will be OK. >> >> I am not getting any help from my sister or best friend coz they also >> think in the same way. In fact, my friend thinks that I should not have come >> out to my parents. According to him, if I don't want to get married then I >> should have told just that thing. I should not have told to parents that I >> am gay and creating so much tension and pain for them. >> >> I need some inputs from you guys. How should I talk to my parents and what >> should I say to make them realise that my both decisions are right - >> 1. It was right decision to come out to them. >> 2. It is better to be remain single rather than get married to a girl. >> >> Thanks and Regards, >> Nish >> >> > > > -- > Do not print this mail unless really necessary. > Save paper, save trees..!! > > If you loose your way while SCUBA diving, the safest direction to head for > is UP..!!! > > > ------------------------------ > Get your preferred Email name! > <http://sg.rd.yahoo.com/aa/mail/domainchoice/mail/signature/*http://mail.promotions.yahoo.com/newdomains/aa/> > Now you can @ymail.com and @rocketmail. com. > > Hi > > > > > -- Do not print this mail unless really necessary. Save paper, save trees..!! If you loose your way while SCUBA diving, the safest direction to head for is UP..!!!
