I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html).
Please wait for direction from your document shepherd or AD before posting a new version of the draft. Document: draft-ietf-isms-secshell-16.txt Reviewer: Francis Dupont Review Date: 2009-05-07 IESG Telechat date: 07 May 2009 Summary: none as draft-ietf-isms-secshell-17.txt was published before I finished the review... Comments are about the not-MIB part (i.e., not the section 7) and of course about the version before the update. Major issues: none in the read part Minor issues: - STD 62 (aka SNMPv3 aka RFC341[1-8]) must be explicitely cited Nits/editorial comments: - ToC page 3: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgements - 1 and 1.1 page 4: move the (SNMP) from 1.1 to 1. - 1.2 page 4: STD62 -> STD 62 (but it should be referenced in 1, not here) - 3.1.4 page 12: a SSH -> an SSH (based on "es es haish" pronunciation) - 5.1 page 16 (twice): e.g. -> e.g., - 5.1 page 17: move the ASI abbrev intro from 5.3 to here - 9.1 page 30: DH -> Diffie-Hellman exchange - 11 page 33: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgements - 12.1 page 34: bad page layout (I-D.ietf-isms-transport-security-model too long for the tool) - Authors' Addresses page 38: US -> USA Regards francis.dup...@fdupont.fr PS: note you have some comments about -17 version from IESG. As I've seen a "Revised ID Needed" I (or another gen-art reviewer) wait for a -18... _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list Gen-art@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
