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TidBits.004 ( Tourist Visa ) And any one wanting to visit India, especially the state of Kerala, must ensure the type of visa one is applying for. Indian Visas of late have become item specific and are not transferable, in that, if you are a businessman and if you are visiting India on a business visa, you must confine yourself to business activities only, good or bad. You can rest assured that no questions will be asked and no one is going to give you a notice to leave the country within seven days, far less put you behind bars even if you are peddling drugs. But if you so much as go to a church or a masjid to offer prayers, and if you are seen mixing around with other devotees, far less talking or preaching to them, be ready to be knifed, beaten blue and black and slapped with a notice to leave the country within seven days whether you are fit to travel or not. And even if the rouges who have knifed you and beat you up are put behind bars, they will be free before you take the first step of the ramp leading to the plane which is flying you home. And, there must be a long list of questions that go along with an application for a visa to visit India. Like, which hotel are you going to stay in. Who own's the hotel. What religion do the hotel owners belong to. Are you a Christian, a Muslim.? Do you have many Christian, Muslim, friends in India?. Are you a businessman? Will you be selling drugs?. Are you going to carry any with you? Which state in India will you be doing business in?. (Free extension of visa if you will do business in New Delhi, specially with the Defence Ministry). A demolition expert? Can you demolish churches and Mosques in record time? Will you be touring while'st on business?. Is it a legitimate or illegitimate business? Is this business anything to do with a Muslim or a Christian God? (If so, please note that all businesses relating to Gods other than the Hindu Gods are permanently closed down in India by virtue of India being a Hindu Rashtra and visas permanently denied). Are you a University professor, a doctor, a animal lover, an IIT'an? (Please note that while you are on a tourist visa in India, you will not be allowed to deliver a lecture in the university or a college or address fellow IIT'ans if you happen to be one, or engage in any academic events while'st on a tourist visa, likewise, you will not be allowed to attend to a serious accident victim to save a life even if you happen to be the only doctor available at the site of the accident. And if you are a animal lover, you are not allowed to kick a stray dog even if one is eyeing you in the intent of a decent meal. And if you are a pedophile, a bird watcher ( either the winged variety with two legs or the no wings variety with two legs), or any one of those many many varieties that come on tourist visas to do everything and anything, including over-staying in this country and even own houses and properties and running restaurants and bars and mini-businesses, you have nothing to worry about so long as you do not mouth the name of Jesus Christ even as a swear word much less dare to preach in His name cause you will be taken as wanting to convert them . And if you be unfortunate to do that, the same fate that has befallen the Rev. Joseph W. Cooper will make your day if you are lucky, but mostly expect to get roasted alive like the Staines in the state of Orissa. And I wonder what type of visa the US immigration department has given our dear Chief Minister, Manohar Parrikar to visit the U.S. of A. and to freely speak about his political ethics to gaping mouth ex -IIT'an audience where back home his winning streak was mainly due to his ingenuity of successfully deleting almost 3000 voters names from the Panjim constituency voter's list in the election that he boasts he won. He should be talking about the ethics of making a minister out of a person whom he wanted to put behind bars for sex scandal. And the American politicians must learn more from the IIT'an Goan Chief Minister how to persuade their state governors to disappear from the scene, if they are to retain their chairs while on foreign trips, like himself. And if that is not all, the American politicians must be given lessons on how well to finance their foreign jaunts, where Goan politicians successfully do just that by allowing crores of rupees worth of illegal Rave Parties on the Goan beaches to go un-hindered at the cost of the well-being of the people of Goa and in defiance of the Courts of law. And if I was a foreigner and if I was wanting to visit India, I would seek a visitor's visa. In that case, I would be able not only to mouth whichever God I wanted to mouth about to whoever, but I could also do some stint for the Devil too. And no police chief from no Kerala would be able to put me on a plane in a jiffy. Cheers Floriano
