Steffen, I hope you don't mind some munging:

Three strokes for Aussie folks, shifting to the top
   Seven for the Americans, in their maps and fors.
Nine for Europeans, doomed to chop
   One for the Dutchman on his golf course.
In the lands of Nether, where the left eyes pop
   One stroke to push them all, one to befunge them
   One stroke to match them all, and in the regexp munge them
In the lands of Nether, where the left eyes pop

Golfing lines 6-7:
   (One stroke) to push them all, one to befunge them
   \1 to match them all, and in the regexp munge them

It even scans, if you pronounce the "backslash" but not the parens!

[Improvements, hacks, etc. welcomed]

^m:r

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