--- ts <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> > --- In [email protected], Know Mystery > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > In one of your posts from late last night you > > mentioned something about how your feelings were > hurt > > that i did not thank you for creating the animated > > dolphin for me. > > > > ts, i don't remember you ever telling me that you > > created it for me - i have no recollection of that > at > > all. > > ~~~ > understood. > i know i did try to mention it to you then as it was > > truly meant to be a gift to you ... and i thought > that > would make you happy. > perhaps you never saw the message. it happens. > and of course ... i really do not think i saw the message at all. > my hurt feelings came as a result of expectations > not met ... > from anticipating something that did not manifest. > that is my doing, not yours. so, you should have just asked me about it instead of letting it fester and build up. Right? > more lessons ... > more grist for the mill. > ~~~ > > > i know that i have said that it is a lovely > animation > > here and in curlchat. > > ~~~ > yes ... > you have commented on many of my works ... > and i appreciate that. i do value your opinions ... > on art, music, the stars ... and more. > if i did not value them ... > i wouldn't care what you thought. ;) > if i didn't like you ... > i wouldn't care what you said. > but that is not the case. i do. > > i have tried to acknowledge your work as well ... > to comment on photos you have/had posted at the > wiki. > i even tried to encourage others to do likewise ... > not just for your work but to comment and support > all of our artists there ... > artists, photographers, poets, storytellers, jesters > ;) ... > for whtever reason, you resisted that ... > even removing the link encouraging folks to do so. > i didn't understand that. ts, i have a different sense of what i wanted the pages to feel like, and of white space and stillness. you go to an art museum and see paintings carefully presented (or not) but there is usually not a lot of extraneous stuff along with the paintings. i want to go to a page of the wiki as a sacred space. i want to feel the expansiveness and elevation of the art. i dont't want to see noise and distractions (and that is just me). what you perceive as helpful comments feels to me like noise that detracts from the experience. it is like listening to a church organ in church. i want to close my eyes and experience the sound of the sounds and the feelings of the sounds as they wash over me... i don't want to also hear a voice saying click here and go to this talk page and discuss how i feel about the sounds i am hearing. i don't want to see links to tech support on an art gallery page. i want more stillness there than you do, that is all. > > and of course i selected your photos when i began > to experiment with page layout options ... > as many of them speak to me ... > nature being my main guru. > and it hurt when you then refused to let me use > them. > i can't help but think that you were trying to hurt > me. > and that hurt even more. ;) it is the same thing about the stillness and sacred space - i wanted the art to not be presented in a noisy space, where the magic is removed ts, i was NOT trying to hurt you. i am not spiteful i do not have that in my repertoire people have different qualities - some people lack musical ability, some people lack physical coordination or gracefulness, some people lack empathy or compassion, others lack spitefulness or vengeance. i lack vengeance and spitefulness. for someone to say that we all are spiteful and vengeful is wrong. > does that justify my reactions to that hurt? you took offense when none was being given. > no. of course not. but i am only human. i think onlyhuman is someone else? > ~~~ > > > you know, back in november a friend got upset > because > > two of us had not acknowledged his birthday... BUT > i > > never knew when his birthday was, so it seems > hardly > > fair for someone to be upset with me... but the > > reality is that he was upset, and my not knowing > the > > date does not take away his upsetness. > > > > i am sorry that your feelings were hurt by my not > > thanking you for the graphic, but i did not know > it > > was for me specifically. > > ~~~ > it's ok. > as i said ... those pesky expectations. ;) > > i am being as open and transparent as i can joyce. > that is what i am trying to do. > and i'm sorry if it upsets you at times. please read the anger management link on the peace wiki, or at least the first linked piece there. it talks about how letting your anger all hang out is a counterproductive stragegy. > but i need to honestly look at how and why i react > to strongly to your and your actions/words. i have no idea why you react so strongly, but i wish it were otherwise. i am tired of bearing the brunt of this . > > i want very much to purge that from my system. > and the only way i know how to do so is to > look directly at it. > it is fine and well and good for you to look at it. it is not fine and well and good to drag others into it and smear them > it may not be pretty ... > but it does work. hmmmmm.... not so sure at all. smearing another person while you work on your own flaws is not the best approach and it does not seem ultimately useful > > i will continue to do that ... > being as honest as i can possible be. > i am after all, a *WIP. > [we all are] > > be peaceful > -ts- > [*Work In Progress] > good luck, love and peace, jocye > > > > __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? 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