My Experiences and How I Find that Islam does not Oppress Women
by Sister Noor
Department of Biology at the University of Essex, U. K.
I came from a purely Hindu family where we were always taught to regard
ourselves (i.e. women) as beings who were eventually to be married off and have
children and serve the husband - whether he was kind or not. Other than this I
found that there were a lot of things which really oppressed women, such as:
* If a woman was widowed, she would always have to wear a white sari (costume),
eat vegetarian meals, cut her hair short, and never re-marry. The bride always
had to pay the dowry (bridal money) to the husband's family. And the husband
could ask for anything, irrespective of whether the bride would have difficulty
giving it.
* Not only that, if after marriage she was not able to pay the full dowry she
would be both emotionally and physically tortured, and could end up being a
victim of "kitchen death" where the husband, or both the mother-in-law and the
husband try to set fire to the wife while she is cooking or is in the kitchen,
and try to make it look like an accidental death. More and more of these
instances are taking place. The daughter of a friend of my own father's had the
same fate last year!
* In addition to all this, men in Hinduism are treated literally as among the
gods. In one of the religious Hindu celebrations, unmarried girls pray for and
worship an idol representing a particular god (Shira) so that they may have
husbands like him. Even my own mother had asked me to do this. This made me see
that the Hindu religion which is based on superstitions and things that have no
manifest proof, but were merely traditions which oppressed women could not be
right.
Subsequently, when I came to England to study, I thought that at least this is
a country which gives equal rights to men and women, and does not oppress them.
We all have the freedom to do as we like, I thought. Well, as I started to meet
people and make new friends, learn about this new society, and go to all the
places my friends went to in order to "socialize" (bars, dance halls, etc.). I
realized that this "equality" was not so true in practice as it was in theory.
Outwardly, women were seen to be given equal rights in education, work, and so
forth, but in reality women were still oppressed in a different, more subtle
way. When I went with my friends to those places they hung out at, I found
everybody interested to talk to me and I thought that was normal. But it was
only later that I realized how naïve I was, and recognized what these people
were really looking for. I soon began to feel uncomfortable, as if I was not
myself: I had to dress in a certain way so that people would like me, and had
to talk in a certain way to please them. I soon found that I was feeling more
and more uncomfortable, less and less myself, yet I could not get out.
Everybody was saying they were enjoying themselves, but I don't call this
enjoying.
I think women in this way of life are oppressed; they have to dress in a
certain way in order to please and appear more appealing, and also talk in a
certain way so people like them. During this time I had not thought about
Islam, even though I had some Muslim acquaintances. But I felt I really had to
do something, to find something that I would be happy and secure with, and
would feel respected with. Something to believe in that is the right belief,
because everybody has a belief that they live according to. If having fun by
getting off with other people is someone's belief, they do this. If making
money is someone's belief, they do everything to achieve this. If they believe
drinking is one way to enjoy life then they do it. But I feel all this leads to
nowhere; no one is truly satisfied, and the respect women are looking for is
diminishing in this way.
In these days of so called "society of equal rights", you are expected to have
a boyfriend (or you're weird!) and to not be a virgin. So this is a form of
oppression even though some women do not realize it. When I came to Islam, it
was obvious that I had finally found permanent security. A religion, a belief
that was so complete and clear in every aspect of life. Many people have a
misconception that Islam is an oppressive religion, where women are covered
from head to toe, and are not allowed any freedom or rights. In fact, women in
Islam are given more rights, and have been for the past 1400 years, compared to
the only-recently rights given to non-Muslim women in some western and some
other societies. But there are, even now, societies where women are still
oppressed, as I mentioned earlier in relation to Hindu women.
Muslim women have the right to inheritance. They have the right to run their
own trade and business. They have the full right to ownership, property,
disposal over their wealth to which the husband has no right. They have the
right to education, a right to refuse marriage as long as this refusal is
according to reasonable and justifiable grounds. The Qur'an itself, which is
the Word of God, contains many verses commanding men to be kind to their wives
and stressing the rights of women. Islam gives the right set of rules, because
they are NOT made by men, but made by God; hence it is a perfect religion.
Quite often Muslim women are asked why they are covered from head to toe, and
are told that this is oppression - it is not. In Islam, marriage is an
important part of life, the making of the society. Therefore, a woman should
not go around showing herself to everybody, only for her husband. Even the man
is not allowed to show certain parts of his body to none but his wife. In
addition, God has commanded Muslim women to cover themselves for their modesty:
"O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers
to draw their cloaks (veils) over their bodies (when outdoors). That is most
convenient that they could be known as such (i.e. decent and chaste) and not
molested." (Qur'an 33:59)
If we look around at any other society, we find that in the majority of cases
women are attacked and molested because of how they are dressed. Another point
I'd like to comment on is that the rules and regulation laid down in Islam by
God do not apply just to women but to men also. There is no intermingling and
free-running between men and women for the benefit of both. Whatever God
commands is right, wholesome, pure and beneficial to mankind; there is no doubt
about that. A verse in the Qur'an explains this concept clearly:
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and protect their
private parts (i.e. from indecency, illegal sexual acts, etc.); that will make
for greater purity for them. And God is well aware of what they do. And say to
the believing women that they should lower their gaze and protect their private
parts (from indecency, illegal sexual intercourse, etc.); and that they should
not display their beauty and ornaments . . . " (Qur'an, Surah Al-Nur 24:31)
When I put on my hijab (veil), I was really happy to do it. In fact, I really
want to do it. When I put on the hijab, I felt a great sense of satisfaction
and happiness. Satisfied that I had obeyed God's command. And happy with the
good and blessings that come with it. I have felt secure and protected. In fact
people respect me more for it. I could really see the difference in behavior
towards me.
Finally, I'd like to say that I had accepted Islam not blindly, or under any
compulsion. In the Qur'an itself there is a verse which says "Let there be no
compulsion in religion". I accepted Islam with conviction. I have seen, been
there, done that, and seen both sides of the story. I know and have experienced
what the other side is like, and I know that I have done the right thing. Islam
does not oppress women, but rather Islam liberates them and gives them the
respect they deserve. Islam is the religion God has chosen for the whole of
mankind. Those who accept it are truly liberated from the chains and shackles
of mankind whose ruling and legislating necessitates nothing but the oppression
of one group by another and the exploitation and oppression of one sex by the
other. This is not the case of Islam which truly liberated women and gave them
an individuality not given by any other authority.
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Agora/4229/in5.html
____________________________________________________________________________________
Fussy? Opinionated? Impossible to please? Perfect. Join Yahoo!'s user panel
and lay it on us. http://surveylink.yahoo.com/gmrs/yahoo_panel_invite.asp?a=7
