Focus: Being a Revert, and a Woman © By Jeanette Mughal The title suggests separateness, individuality rather than the usual term of calling all women in Islam, Muslimahs. The dichotomy of being a revert to Islam is as unnecessary as the cultural dominance of certain ethnic groups within any of our religious communities. Most reverts are seen as a lower caste of Islam because of a lack of fluency in Arabic or a valid ethnic group to identify with (unless through marriage). In other words, we have more to prove. In the USA, one-third of Muslims are of African-American descent. From personal experiences, this fact does not (for some) make you a “true Muslim”. For some, they discriminately accept the imagined general consensus that a true Muslim is a white-skinned Arab. If one reflected back to our first muezzin, Bilal ibn Rabah (RA), of Ethopian origin yet born in Arabia, if not at the insistence of our Prophet (SAW), he would not have been given the chance to call all to prayers. Despite the numerous lectures and reassurances on what is Sunnah, race still plays a vital role in our Islamic society especially when the focus on selecting someone for marriage. The Revert Through my years of being in my communities here in the US, or living for some time in Pakistan, most men choose white-skinned women (if not their own native-born women). Most Muslim men select non-Muslim women (before their conversion) to marry them for their citizenship alliance to a First World country. It is the usual consensus that non-Muslim women who convert for marriage are dispensable. There is less likelihood for that man to undergo any type of retribution from family members if he got rid of her after he has fulfilled his own personal agenda. There have been native-born Muslimahs who have been discarded but are usually protected by the ethnic group that she has more lineage or connection. For the revert who has been discarded, she will in time, often welcome negative comments and ridicule. A few years ago, I met a revert sister during a women’s workshop in Washington state had just recently been given a divorce. She spoke to me about her divorce after enduring years of mistreatment by her Arab husband. I was more shocked at her relaying the harsh words stated to her by some of the men (associated with the husband) who told her “to go back” and “that she had no reason to be Muslim anymore”. Not only did the sister endure years of mistreatment but she was being teased “back to her own kind”. I still think about her, try to keep her in my dua, and will never forget how much I was not in a capacity to do more than show her my support. My first husband said the very same thing to me, except for our children who knew no other life than being Muslim—culturally and spiritually. Reverting from Reversion
Most reverts will tell you that to revert back to being a Christian is like saying that your skin will remain white after bleaching. Your bleached skin will only remain lighter if you continue to use the cream; but most of us know that this chemical can harm your skin and cause irreparable damage. For some of us to “return” will not be wholly acceptable—we will carry the stain of having left a religion for another then returning. To what? Usually the stigma of being “temporarily lost”, and still lost. After all, we have been tainted with a religion; possibly have been brain-washed—we would have been outcastes from one religion to another. Non-Muslim families are generally not accepting of family members who have left their religion for Islam. The revert endures years of non-communication with their own family members, and unaccepted within their newfound religion (by a few). When reverts try to remain to what is found to be true (Islam) despite personal heartache, beliefs are challenged by ridicule and rumor. Divorcees or reverts can become as desirable as lepers. If the subject of remarriage is addressed, often reverts are subject to marriages that is a multiple or muta’a type. With a divorce, the revert continues to endure more trials by both environments. It is often their faith and the few strong believers that Allah SWT brings forth to her (or him) for support that brings comfort and relief. There is truly no return! Searching for Answers Personally, I cannot give anyone the final outcome on choices to be made or the perfect road to take in this life; but, developing ones self-esteem through continuous prayers is a good plan. Nothing is perfect! To strive for perfection through days of heartache then joy is not a fault in judgment but a strengthening of ones character and pure reliance on Allah SWT. Islam was built on the foundation of conversion from the pagan to the perfection of our faith. It is this faith that one must give to every one new to Islam. Regardless of how one came to be Muslim—the fact remains that Allah SWT opened the door for one to revert to Islam. I have never regretted being Muslim, despite the personal challenges I have faced or seen in others. Reference: http://www.adherents.com/largecom/com_islam_usa.html http://copyright.ala.org/ala/home/copyright.htm http://www.answers.com/topic/islam-in-the-united-states http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islam_in_the_United_States http://www.saudiaramcoworld.com/issue/198304/the.first.muezzin.htm ************************************************************ Focus: Being a Revert, and a Woman © September 14, 2008 By Jeanette Mughal EdD candidate in Educational Leadership **Permission to use, copy, and distribute article delivered from this World Wide Web server is hereby granted for private, non-commercial and education purposes only, provided that the above copyright notice appears with the following notice: this document may be reprinted and distributed for non-commercial and educational purposes only, and not for resale. No resale use may be made of material on this web site at any time. All other rights reserved. j786SURAH22 ------------------------------------ *************************************************************************** {Invite (mankind, O Muhammad ) to the Way of your Lord (i.e. Islam) with wisdom (i.e. with the Divine Inspiration and the Qur'an) and fair preaching, and argue with them in a way that is better. Truly, your Lord knows best who has gone astray from His Path, and He is the Best Aware of those who are guided.} (Holy Quran-16:125) {And who is better in speech than he who [says: "My Lord is Allah (believes in His Oneness)," and then stands straight (acts upon His Order), and] invites (men) to Allah's (Islamic Monotheism), and does righteous deeds, and says: "I am one of the Muslims."} (Holy Quran-41:33) The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "By Allah, if Allah guides one person by you, it is better for you than the best types of camels." [al-Bukhaaree, Muslim] The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said, "Whoever calls to guidance will have a reward similar to the reward of the one who follows him, without the reward of either of them being lessened at all." [Muslim, Ahmad, Aboo Daawood, an-Nasaa'ee, at-Tirmidhee, Ibn Maajah] -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Recommended: http://www.ikhwanweb.com http://www.islamonline.net http://www.islam-guide.com http://www.prophetmuhammadforall.org -------------------------------------------------------------------------- All views expressed herein belong to the individuals concerned and do not in any way reflect the official views of IslamCity unless sanctioned or approved otherwise. 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