When I call my telephone or credit card company, I can never speak to a human immediately. For some reason, the humans are always busy with other customers, and I have to listen to a machine tell me something like this: "Please stay on the line. Your call is important to us. So important that we'll try our best to speak to you within the next year or so." Determined to speak to a human, I stay on the line for an eternity, carrying the phone around with me - to the kitchen, bedroom and bathroom - hoping that I won't have to take a shower with it. My phone has lots of useful features, but I don't think it's waterproof. And even if it was, I wouldn't feel comfortable speaking on the phone when I'm undressed. I just don't trust technology. But despite this concern, I remain on the line, until the machine has repeated its message at least 260 times and the company has realized that I'm not ready to hang up or die of old age. A human finally takes my call, greeting me with a cheery tone that's almost as annoying as the long wait. "Hello. May I help you?" "Thank God, a human," I say. "I was beginning to think all the humans had been replaced. Please help me remember why I called. "I have no idea why you called," the human says. "We're paid to read scripts, not minds. The reason I have to wait so long is obvious: companies just don't employ enough humans to answer their phones. They prefer using machines, partly because machines never get paid, never take coffee breaks, and never accuse the boss of sexual harassment. But some companies, thankfully, are trying to employ more humans, while cutting their costs. They're moving their call centers to a country with a great supply of humans: Pakistan. Yes, Pakistan is fast becoming the call center capital of the world. American companies are taking advantage of Pakistan's large pool of educated and English-speaking humans. And it's not because these Pakistani's are willing to work for peanuts. Even better, they're willing to work for rupees. For the cost of employing one overworked American, a company can employ five overjoyed Pakistanis. Before answering calls from America, these employees are required to not only speak with an American accent, but also learn about American culture, perhaps by watching several episodes of "Jerry Springer." They're also expected to Americanize their names. If they're Saima or Kalsoom, they become Sid or Sumi at work. .Some callers may not like the idea of speaking to Pakistanis personating Americans. As for me, I have no complaints. As long as I get to speak to a human, I don't care who answers my call - a Pakistani, an Australian, an Eskimo. Kathryn Whittaker, NY (from an email posting) ------------------------- ISPAK -------------------------- ISPAK Discussion List. Members are limited to officials of ISPs and ESPs of Pakistan and select media representatives. -------------- http://ispak.net.pk -----------------------
