-------------------------
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
---------------------------------------
Why does a man have a hole in his penis?
To get some air to his brain.
-------------------------------------------
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.
-----------------------------------
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One US leader.
------------------------------------
How can you tell when a man's had an orgasm?
>From the snoring.
----------------------------------
What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts.
----------------------------
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
------------------------------------
What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room
together?
100 people who don't do dick.
----------------------------
How did the tugboat get AIDs?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
-------------------------------------
A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon.
That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her worst.
-----------------------------------------
Define "Egghead:"
What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.
--------------------------------
What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?
Popeye almost killed him!
-----------------------------------
What's the definition of a teenager?
God's punishment for enjoying sex.
----------------------------
What's the definition of eternity?
4 blondes at a 4-way stop intersection.
--------------------------------
Mom's have Mother's Day,
father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
---------------------------------
Why is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a good hand, you don't need a partner.
-------------------------------------
What do a coffin and a condom have in common?
They're both filled with stiffs, only one's coming and one's going!
--------------------------------
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a blowjob!
--------------------------------
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your pecker.
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