From: "suyento" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
I Was a Daughter of Islam
What I discovered when I lifted the veil on my world
By Rockie; photograph by Dan Bryant
I was born in Jordan to a Muslim family, and was named Ruqaya after one of the
prophet Muhammad's daughters. My uncle, who'd moved to Chicago, told my dad
about the wonderful opportunities in the U.S., so my dad moved our family here
when I was eight years old. While he was excited about providing for his
family, my father worried that we'd grow up "Christian." So while my siblings
and I went to a public school during the week, we attended Islamic studies on
the weekends. The only friends I had were the Muslim kids who attended Islamic
studies with me.
As I grew older, my dad became more concerned about the possibility I'd become
"Americanized." So when I turned 14, my father decided I should return to
Jordan to live with my grandmother. I wasn't thrilled about living so far from
my family, but when I arrived in Jordan, I loved the people, the culture, and
Islam, so I was happy to stay.
More than 90 percent of Muslims are of the Sunni sect-those who strictly follow
the Qur'an and the Hadith (the sayings of Muhammad). Since my family was Sunni,
I prayed five times a day, fasted during the month of Ramadan, read the Qur'an
daily, wore the veil (covering my entire body, and showing only my hands, face,
and feet), and tried to imitate the prophet Muhammad in every way. But no
matter what I did for Allah, I felt I needed to do more to avoid his wrath. I
tried to earn his favor so I could go to heaven.
I spent three years in Jordan, but missed my family so much, I asked my dad if
I could return to live with them in the U.S. Once I returned, I stopped wearing
my head covering because I didn't want to look like an "oddball," but I still
kept strong in my prayers and my faith. And I was content-until my father
decided it was time for me to get married.
Arab culture dictates men and women are not allowed to date. When a man finds a
"suitable" woman, it's usually through family connections. The man and his
family visit the young girl's home to meet her family. The "couple" are allowed
to speak to each other, but only in the presence of both families. After
several similar visits, the couple decide if they want to get married. In
Islam, a woman has the right to say no, but in the culture, the family usually
pressures the girl to say yes. In both the culture and religion, a woman can
marry her first cousin. So when I turned 23, my dad pressured me to marry my
first cousin who lives in Jordan. While I was against the marriage and
certainly didn't want to spend the rest of my life married to someone I didn't
love, I didn't feel I had the choice to go against my father's wishes. My
father flew there ahead of me to prepare for the wedding. The rest of my family
couldn't afford to fly to Jordan, so my father would be the only immediate
family member at the ceremony.
A week later, my elder brother took me to the airport to ensure I got on the
plane. Because of tight security on international flights, my brother was
unable to take me directly to my gate, so he dropped me off at the main
terminal and went home.
As I waited for my flight, I thought about my future. I didn't want to marry my
first cousin! But if I didn't, I'd disgrace my family.
In Arab culture, when a woman disgraces her family-or is even rumored to have
done so-she deserves to die. I knew if I left the airport and ran away, my
family would come after me to kill me for disgracing them. But the longer I
thought about how miserable I'd be married to a man I didn't love or respect,
the more angry I became. I've fasted for you; I've prayed five times a day to
you; I've even studied the Qur'an for you, I inwardly screamed at Allah. And
this is what you allow to happen?! Right then, on February 10, 1990, I stopped
praying and worshiping Allah.
I grabbed my luggage and escaped to the nearest hotel to hide. I didn't have
much money and desperately tried to think of what to do next. I didn't have
many American friends because my father wouldn't allow me to be influenced by
their "Satanic ways." But I did know one American woman whom I called from the
hotel. I told her briefly what happened and asked if I could stay with her for
a while. She came immediately and picked me up.
When the plane landed in Jordan 16 hours later without me on it, my father
became furious. He called my brother and told him to find me.
I stayed with my friend for a few weeks, until one day my brother showed up at
her office with a gun. He told her, "I know you have my sister. Give her back
before anybody gets hurt!" A coworker called the police, but my brother left
before they arrived. My friend got home that night and told me it was too
dangerous for me to stay with her any longer, but recommended I stay at a
shelter for women suffering from domestic violence.
When I arrived at the shelter, they told me I couldn't stay there either
because they'd seen two men showing my photo at a nearby restaurant. They sent
me to another shelter an hour away.
After several weeks at that shelter, and only after I began to feel safe, did I
allow myself to feel any emotions. Everything I'd bottled up burst out of me,
and I sobbed as I mourned the loss of my family and my way of life.
Because I had a naturalized U.S. citizenship, I joined the National Guard for
the government's protection. After my training, I returned and found a job.
Miraculously, I hid from my family for four years. But I missed them so much, I
finally gathered my courage, contacted my mother, and met with her and my
younger sister. We spent most of our time together in tears. The rest of my
family had little to say to me. But slowly over time, my family and I began to
make peace, and I was amazed at how they finally accepted me back. I thought,
Allah didn't neglect me after all, and returned to my faith. I didn't pray five
times a day or worship him the way I had in the past, but I thanked him daily
and did nice things I thought would please him.
In february 1998, I accepted a job for a company based in Texas. Three days
after I moved, I met Robyn, who was walking her dog in front of my apartment.
We started talking and became fast friends. So when she invited me to go to her
church, I agreed. It's probably okay, I thought. My faith believes that Jesus
was a messenger of Allah, too. I'm sure Allah won't be upset if I go to church.
I enjoyed the pastor's sermon-except when he talked about Jesus. Sometimes he'd
say Jesus is God, and sometimes he'd say Jesus is the Son of God. How could
Jesus be both God and God's Son? But I continued to go to church with Robyn
until one day the pastor said the church was supporting missionaries in Muslim
countries where they don't know Jesus. I thought, Of course Muslims know Jesus.
I need to set the record straight. After the service, I introduced myself to
the pastor, Pete, and said, "I'm a Muslim, and I do know Jesus."
I was thoroughly convinced the prophet Muhammad was the last messenger and the
Qur'an was the last book sent by Allah. The Qur'an clearly states Jesus was a
messenger born of a virgin mother, Mary. He performed many miracles such as
bringing the dead to life, healing the sick, speaking when he was a baby, and
creating a bird out of clay. Allah loved him so much that when his enemies were
preparing to crucify him, he sent someone who looked like Jesus to be crucified
instead. Muslims believe Jesus never died, but was raised to heaven to be
protected from his enemies. Jesus, in the Qur'an, claims he never told anyone
to worship him but to worship the one true God, Allah. According to Muslims,
the Bible has been changed-and Christians and Jews don't really have the true
books. When Allah gave Muhammad the message, Allah preserved the Qur'an and
made sure no one changed it.
The more I attended church, the more I wondered why Christians had different
beliefs than Muslims; both the Bible and the Qur'an couldn't be right. As I
wrestled with Christianity, I asked Robyn and Pete: Was Jesus crucified? Did
Jesus die on the cross for our sins? Is Jesus God, or the Son of God? What is
meant by the Trinity? Is the Bible really accurate?
I read different books on Christianity and Islam and discovered the Bible
hadn't changed; its books were accurate. Then Pete introduced me to a Bible
professor, Dan, who took me through the messianic prophesies of the Old
Testament and showed me how they were fulfilled in the New Testament. At that
point I was able to believe Jesus was crucified for our sins. But I still
wrestled with whether or not Jesus was God. In Islam, to believe in any god
other than Allah is blasphemous and unforgivable.
On Sunday, August 2, 1998, several months after I started to investigate
Christianity, an Iranian Christian pastor named Iraj, whom I met through Pete,
called and said he'd like to meet to discuss our beliefs. That evening, I
visited with him and told him I believed in Jesus' crucifixion, but not in his
deity. I also told him I'd studied the life of Jesus and no one in history
compares to him. Iraj said, "Well, if you think Jesus is that wonderful and
that he died on the cross for your sins, will you confess that before God?" I
agreed, and we prayed together. That was the day I received Jesus as my Savior.
After that, God's Spirit began to open my eyes to the truth of Jesus' deity.
It's been almost four years since that day. My dad and elder sister refuse to
speak to me. I maintain a relationship with my mom, who doesn't mention my
conversion. My brother rejected me. The rest of my family tolerates my new
religion.
One of my deepest longings is to see my family and all Muslims accept Jesus as
their Savior and to see Christians burdened for the Muslim people, especially
the ones living in the U.S.
I'm so grateful Jesus led me to himself. He's been there for me when I needed
him-and even when I thought I didn't need him. In Islam, I had to work to earn
God's approval. Now I'm free to bask in God's unconditional love! Above all,
I'm amazed he loves me so much he died on the cross for me-so that now I'm a
daughter of God.
Rockie is a student majoring in biblical studies. Contact her at [EMAIL
PROTECTED] or join us for a live online chat with Rockie on May 21 at 9 p.m.
est. See details at www.todayschristianwoman.net.
4 Ways to Reach Out to Muslims
There are more than 1 billion Muslims in the world, and more than 5 million in
the U.S., making Islam one of the fastest-growing religions in America-quickly
emerging as the second-largest religion behind Christianity. Here's what you
can do to make an impact.
Pray for them. The only way a Muslim will ever come to Christ is if the Holy
Spirit works in her heart to draw her to the truth. Pray specifically that:
Muslims would be open to reading the Bible and would believe the Bible is the
preserved, authentic Word of God; they'll believe Jesus was crucified for their
sins and resurrected from the dead; God will remove any misconceptions they
have about Christianity; God will give them courage to surrender to Christ.
Know your faith. It isn't as important to a Muslim what you know about Islam
as it is important for you to know about your own faith. Steep yourself in
God's Word so you can address any questions a Muslim may have about what the
Bible and Christianity teach.
Remove any misconceptions about Muslims. Not all Muslims are extremists,
such as the Taliban. Not all of them hate Americans or Jews. Basically, they
want the same good things from life we want. Many Christians assume all Muslims
know Islam and the Qur'an very well. The fact is, however, most Muslims are
Muslim in name only; they know little of their faith.
Befriend them. The best way to reach out to a Muslim is to show her Christ's
love. Sharing the gospel isn't enough to reach a Muslim. She has on spiritual
blinders (2 Corinthians 4:4) that require time, prayer, and the outpouring of
Christ's love working through you. But the results of your persistence will be
worth it (Galatians 6:9).
Copyright © 2002 by the author or Christianity Today International/Today's
Christian Woman magazine.
Click here for reprint information on Today's Christian Woman.
May/June 2002, Vol. 24, No. 3, Page 29
Taken from www.christianitytoday.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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