I don't know how to write what i am feeling without it sounding like I am telling you all what you should do. I am not. You must all do as you please.
The issue at hand has been done to death. Those who undertsand it always did and those who don't or won't still don't or won't. The frequent use of 'petty' to descirbe the situation shows this. The guilt trips laid on by people quitting are just that. each of is responsible for our actions and reactions. If people choose to leave, that is their action for which they are responsible for. The complaints about subject matter. You know, before the Only Joni list, there were many complaints about NJC. There still are and by people who chose NOT to go only joni! What arrogance! Then we get others complaining they didn't get defended over a perceived sleight yet have remained silent on this. I am completely baffled by all this. I do think this has been done to death. We have had argu,ments before and got thru all of them. This one is now worrying me. I think al those points people have to make have been made and I for one see little point in repeating them again and again and again and again. it is frustrating and I fear a waste of time. people will think what they want to think. I think the terribly dark act of the 11th has left a dark cloud over all of us and whilst it is not what casued this situation on the list, it may have exacerbated it. I love this list. i wouldn't have remained for over 4 years now if I didn't. I think genrally the people on this list are good and open hearted and sensitive-hence i think why this situation. I am NOT saying we should let situations such as this arise and do nothing and say nothing-after all that is how this got out of hand in the first place. No we should ALL defend our list. however, this war has been fought, there has been an outcome and like in all wars, some are happy and some are not. For the record, i am not happy it came to this. But I also cannot see how it could have been different. It is sad, really sad, it came to this. so much anger and pain caused thru one person's inability to deal with pain appropriately. Whlist this whole situation sadden's me I will not accept any responsibilty for another's beahviour, nor should Debra, Azeem, Chris, Ashara, Kate or anybody else that had the courage to stand against it. I know at least some of us did knowing we would bring down wrath upon ourselves. By the way, if you met my father, you would like him very much. Funny, charming, polite, friendly. You would never believe he fucked his children. you would never believe he knocked them unconcious. No you wouldn't believe. If you met my mother, you would think she was gracious and attractive and warm. you would never have believed that she would be cruel to her children, that she would defend her man, would allow him to do what he did and not only that but blame it on her 'naguhty' boys. That would fill their hearts with fear of hell and damnation and 'childrens homes'. And, no she was not timid nor did he ever hit her so it wasn't fear. The point I am making here, is that people have different experiences of people. people do not want to believe the bad stuff. Simply, it is too uncomfortable. And I am pretty sure I need to add this: I am not imply ing here that marcel did anything worse than he did. I merely use my own experiece because it is such a good example of how people who appear to the world as truly nice and good people, can do such truly bad things. -- bw colin DAK,BRO GC, 950i 940,860,864, 260, 890,Silver 830 and 270, Passap 6000 Duo80 [EMAIL PROTECTED] http://www.tantra-apso.com
