A long time ago, a Native American was sent to the
west coast to keep watch, there was a rumour on one of the cable drum beat
channels, that Pilgrims were coming, he didnbt know what they were, but
things were grim enough already, "I Love Lucy" had been axed, nothing to do
with ratings, he who eats Mexican food (Grumbleguts) put his tomahawk through
the set, when he heard the Redskins had lost again
For days he looked out to sea, then gradually a sail
began to appear on the horizon, an hour later there were rowing boats heading
for shore, the native parked his Harley under a tree and walked down the
beach. The boats crunched into the beach, the Native said How!! the boat went
over his foot.. In the distance there was a loud wailing sound, the Pilgrim
asked if the Police were coming, ah no said the Native, thatbs just a couple
of Fire Injuns..
The head Pilgrim explained they had come to build
Disneyland, good enough for me man, said the native, his favourite film was
"Snow White" ,I like the bit where the seven dwarfs get to bb the Pilgrim
stopped him quickly," thatbs not the Disney version "he said," ah well
thatb
s ok" said the native, and he allowed them to leave the boat one by one. As
the boats emptied the native spotted three odd characters at the back of one
of the boats, a giant bird of prey throwing up over the side of the boat, an
ugly pig making all sorts noises, and a parrot that was constantly scratching
He called the head Pilgrim over and said they canbt come
in man, the Pilgrims asked why, and the native said pointing at them one by
one - "Him ill eagle, him he grunts, and I donbt want no Polly Tics man"
So even way back then, Americans didnbt like illegal
immigrants or politics, I rest my case your Honour, and every word of this is
true, cause George Burns told me, and he was old enough to have been
there(wasnbt he great) FRED
Poem by the late great Spike Milligan One for the Religious discussion.
Itbs
about a fire in a Church called "Holly Smoke" You must adopt your best frail
old vicar voice when reading it, not so much to make it work, but people will
laugh twice as much at you, those who know Spike will know the voice you
need.
I am the vicar of St Pauls, and Ibm ringing the
steeple
bell
The floor of the church is on fire, or the lid has come
off hell,
Should I call the fire brigade, or should I pray to the
lord,
Oh, I just remembered, I donbt think that webre
insured.
In rushed the fire chief, he said "Is this church C of
E,"
"It is then we canbt put it out, my lads are all RC.
TTFN - Fred
