I hope you all enjoy this...i know i did cos its so on point about nigerians
 
Razaq Adegboyega Elegbede Mnitp, Rtp< Razzy> 

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From: Jide Olaiya <[email protected]>
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Sent: Thursday, September 22, 2011 4:07 PM
Subject: [isololasumba2006] LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS


  
Dear All, 
 
This is a must-read for every parent and parent to be. Our children must be 
taught the virtues of humility and hard work. We must go back to the basics!! I 
didn’t write it but this writer spoke my mind!
 
 
Jide Olaiya 
 
YOA Insurance Brokers Limited
13 Abraham Adesanya Road
Apapa, Lagos
Nigeria
T: + 234 (0) 1 271 1345/ 734 9687
M: + (0) 234 802 398 2180
E: [email protected]
www.yoainsurance.com
 
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--- On Tue, 9/20/11, oladokun funke <[email protected]> wrote:
 
Subject:LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS
 
 
LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS

Friends,

Let me add the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK - 
and I live in Lagos now. The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, 
white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job 
to support themselves - including the children of millionaires amongst them. It 
is the norm over there - regardless how wealthy their parents are. And I soon 
discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same - the 
exception being those of us status-conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the 
Biography Channel and, to my amazement; he said that his young children travel 
in the economy class -even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper 
class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound Sterling. A quick survey would 
show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to 
commence their studies in the UK . No other foreign students do this. There is 
no aircraft attached to the office of the prime minister in the UK - he travels 
on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft 
for her exclusive use. 

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries 
forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton the lass married to Prince 
William drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there's one core 
difference in them and us (generally speaking). They - the billionaires among 
them work for their money, we steal ours! 

If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying 
for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let's begin now and 
teach them to work hard so that they can stand alone and most importantly be 
content, and not have to "steal". This seems to be the norm these days.

"30 is the new 18", which seems to be the new age for testing out the world in 
Nigeria now. That seems to be an unspoken but widely accepted mindset among the 
last 2 generations of parents in Nigeria . 

At age 18 years, a typical young adult in the UK leaves the clutches of his/her 
parents for the University, chances are, that's the last time those parents 
will ever play "landlord" to their son or daughter except of course the 
occasional home visits during the academic year.

At 21 years and above or below, the now fully grown and independent minded 
adult graduates from University, searches for employment, gets a job and shares 
a flat with other young people on a journey into becoming fully fledged adults.

I can hear the echo of parents saying, well, that is because the UK economy is 
thriving, safe, well structured and jobs are everywhere? I beg to differ and I 
ask that you kindly hear me out. I am UK trained Recruitment Consultant and I 
have been practicing for the past 10 years in Nigeria . I have a broad range of 
experience from recruiting graduates to executive director level of large 
corporations. In addition, I talk from the point of view of someone with 
relatively privileged upbringing. 

Driven to school every day, had my clothes washed for me, was barred from 
taking any part-time job during my A-levels so that I could concentrate on 
studying for my exams?! BUT, I got the opportunity to live apart from my 
parents from age 18 and the only time I came back home to stay was for 3 months 
before I got married!

Am I saying that every parent should wash their hands off their children at age 
18? No, not at all, of course, I enjoyed the savings that I made from living on 
and off at my parent's house in London - indeed that is the primary reason for 
my being able to buy myself a 3 bedroom flat in London at age 25 with 
absolutely no direct financial help from my parents!

For me, pocket money stopped at age 22, not that it was ever enough for my 
lifestyle to compete with Paris Hilton's or Victoria Beckham's. Meanwhile 
today, we have Nigerian children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their 
lives insisting on flying "only" first or business class, carrying the latest 
Louis Vuitton ensemble, Victoria 's Secret underwear and wearing Jimmy Choo's, 
fully paid for by their "loving" parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents, my son graduated 2 years ago and is 
still looking for a job, can you please assist! Oh really! So where exactly 
this “child” is my usual question. Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and me, chances are that 
big boy is cruising around Lagos with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad's 
spanking new SUV with enough "pocket money" to put your salary to shame. It is 
not at all strange to have a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his 
or her life in Nigeria but "earns" a six figure "salary" from parents for doing 
absolutely nothing. 
I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skills 
to sell, apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad's secretary in the office. 
Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job 
interview. We have a fairly decent conversation and we get to the inevitable 
question - so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out - 
N250,000.00. I ask if that is per month or per annum.

Of course it is per month. Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much 
on your first job? Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I 
feel that an employer should be able to pay me more than my parents. I try very 
hard to compose myself, over parenting is in my opinion the greatest evil 
handicapping the Nigerian youth. It is at the root of our national malaise. 

We have a youth population of tens of millions of who are being "breastfed and 
diapered" well into their 30s. Even though the examples I have given above are 
from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from 
Abeokuta to Adamawa! Wake up mum! Wake up dad! You practically love your 
children to death! No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society 
of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if 
it were a birth right.

I want to encourage you to send your young men and women (anyone over 20 can 
hardly be called a child!) out into the world, maybe even consider reducing or 
stopping the pocket money to encourage them to think, explore and strive. Let 
them know that it is possible for them to succeed without your "help".

Take a moment to think back to your own time as a young man/woman, what if 
someone had kept spoon feeding you, would you be where you are today? No tree 
grows well under another tree, children that are not exposed to challenges, 
don't cook well. That is why you see adults complaining, "my parents didn't buy 
clothes for me this Christmas", ask him/her how old are you? 30 years +. 
Because of the challenges we faced in our youth, we are where and what we are 
today. This syndrome-my children will not suffer what I suffered is destroying 
our tomorrow. 

Deliberately, reduce their allowance or mum-don't cook on Saturday till late 
afternoon or evening-do as occasion deserve.

I learnt the children of a former Nigerian head of state with all the stolen 
(billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as 
wrecks. They are on drugs, several times because of the drug, they collapse in 
public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go, what a life! 
No one wants to marry them. Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty 
or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.The greatest thing in life is 
to keep your mind young.- Henry Ford. Hard work does not kill;everything in 
Nigeria is going down, including family settings. It is time to cook our 
children, preparing them for tomorrow. We are approaching the season in Nigeria 
where only the RUGGED, will survive. How will your ward fare? 

If the present generation of Nigerian pilots retires, will you fly a plane 
flown by a young Nigerian pilot, If trained in Nigeria ? People now have first 
class, who cannot spell GRADUATE or read an article without bomb blast! Which 
Way Nigeria ?, Which Way Nigerians!! Is this how we will ALL sit and watch this 
country SINK?
 
(Please forward to as many Nigerian parents as you know)
 


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