From: R.P.
Penguins accept same-sex commitments. Why do some people have so much trouble with the idea?
Feb. 23 - Birds do it. Bees do it. And, it turns out, even the penguins at
the Central Park Zoo do it. So let's do it: Let's let gay people make a
lifelong commitment to each other marry openly, legally and in public.
I reached this Cole Porter-esque conclusion on Valentine's Day when, in my
ongoing quest to understand why some heterosexuals believe that gay marriage
will destroy their "traditional" marriages, I stopped by the Central Park Zoo
to interview the famously gay penguins, Roy and Silo.
You may not know about Roy and Silo, but we New Yorkers have been mighty
proud since they came out in 1998. Finally, instead of having New York's
collective sex life defined by the floozy, commitment-challenged
heterosexual women of "Sex and the City" or the pages of personal ads taken
out by single losers, we finally had a First Couple of Monogamy that would
show the world that love and fidelity could still conquer all (plus, they
looked great in their little tuxedos).
Roy and Silo's love is a story for the ages. Like so many great lovers, Roy
and Silo met in a zoo holding tank in 1998. They were young then, and unsure
of themselves sexually, like many adolescents (and when I say "adolescents,"
of course, I mean me). But their attraction could not be denied, and they have
remained inseparable, according to Central Park Zoo penguin keeper Rob
Gramzay.
Gramzay knew that Roy and Silo had paired off, because at breeding time,
they did everything the "straight" penguins did: they built a nest, they
defended it from others and engaged in what zookeepers euphemistically call
"ecstatic display." It sounds kinky, but it simply means that the penguins stand
straight up, stretch out their wings and entwine their necks. It's the penguin
equivalent of going to City Hall in San Francisco.
(As an aside, isn't S.F. mayor Gavin Newsom a genius? By allowing gays to
marry, not only is he sending a powerful civil rights message, but every one
of those gay couples had to buy a marriage license. At $82 a pop, Newsom has
added almost $400,000 to the strapped civic treasury-money that certainly
won't be refunded when President Bush amends the Constitution to do
something no reasonable compassionate conservative would ever do: Make it
less protective of individual freedom and personal liberty rather than more).
Back in the tank, Roy and Silo's behavior indicated that they really wanted
a kid. Zookeepers gave them a dummy penguin egg, just to see if they'd
actually incubate it. When they did, zookeepers gave them an actual egg,
which Roy and Silo again incubated. When the baby chick was born, Roy and
Silo cared for it, feeding it yummy regurgitated smelt and keeping it warm
until it could survive on its own.
Years later, Roy and Silo are still going strong. And so are all their
heterosexual penguin pals who share the tank with them. So, that dispels one
myth about gay marriage: Roy and Silo's commitment to each other has not
destroyed the sanctity of the other penguin marriages. Gramzay said the
penguin divorce rate remains the same as it was before Roy and Silo hooked
up.
Not that you see much "hooking up." I'll admit it, I had gone to Central
Park in hopes of seeing some hot gay penguin sex, but it turns out that
penguins pretty much ignore each other until mating season, which begins in
about six weeks. So when I visited the tank last week, Roy was puttering
around with a rock while Silo swam and barely made eye contact. In other words, they
looked liked an old married couple.
Besides, sex in the penguin world - straight or gay-isn't all that hot (and
it's barely sex). Penguins don't have genitals, per se, so gay penguin sex
is exactly the same as straight penguin sex (not to be graphic here, but it
basically involves the locking of cloacae. Can I say "cloacae" on a family
Web site?). The only difference, Gramzay said, is that Roy and Silo unlock
before, um, "completion."
That sounded strange to me, so I called my thespian friend, Eric Oleson
(it's okay to call him that because he's openly thespian). As a gay man,
Oleson was impressed by Roy and Silo's commitment to each other, despite a
climax-free sex life. "It's actually kind of sweet," Oleson said. "They realize that
they don't have the equipment, yet they're still devoted to each other. It shows
that gay marriage is not just about sex." (Another gay-marriage myth dispelled!
Just because a couple can't breed, doesn't mean it can't love. And, after all, Roy
and Silo successfully adopted.)
So if Roy and Silo can do it, why can't humans? Indeed, if homosexual
marriages exist in the animal kingdom, they must be normal. Then again, many
opponents of gay marriage say that anything animals do is, well, animalistic
and they want no part of it. But by that logic, we should give up straight
sex, too, because animals pretty much invented it (and the French perfected it). And
if Roy and Silo haven't destroyed the other penguins' heterosexual relationships,
why do so many human heterosexuals feel that their marriages will be undermined
just because a few thousand gays in San Francisco are pledging to spend the rest
of their lives together?
After all, human marriage has somehow survived a 50-percent divorce rate. As
Roy and Silo prove in their tank in Central Park, marriage will survive
letting gays into the imperfect club, too.
----- Tamara P Duvall Lexington, Virginia, USA Formerly of Warsaw, Poland http://lorien.emufarm.org/~tpd/
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